A Whole New World
by burgandy.heart
Summary: When Voldemort was defeated, many of Harry Potter's loved ones were resurrected. Follow their journey as they make new friends, accept new love, and overcome their own personal struggles. It is a whole new world, after all. *Mostly focuses on Severus Snape, Sirius Black, and eventually Fred Weasley*
1. Chapter 1

Severus 

Severus Snape unwillingly walked towards the staff common room. Now that the war was over, there would be a new year at Hogwarts where the students would be completing the year they had missed.

The events that took place after Lord Voldemort was defeated brought back many of those who lost their lives in the war. Severus, Albus Dumbledore, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, James and Lily Potter and countless others were alive. Severus could not believe his eyes when he saw Lily in the flesh. Lily whom he loved more than his own life, who _was_ his life. She was alive, and she had forgiven Severus for his greatest mistake. Lily's return, however, was bittersweet. She was still married to James Potter and there was no changing that. James had reached out to Severus and thanked him for protecting Harry. In fact, everybody thanked Severus for his bravery and considered him a Hero, which embarrassed him to no end.

Severus continued to walk at a steady pace, still in thought, when he felt a small push.

"Ouch" cried a soft voice.

Severus looked in front of him. A woman, who was now on the ground. Her luggage was sprawled over the ground as well, and amid everything that had just happened, she was struggling to get up. _Great, another Nymphadora_, Severus thought with a groan. Severus held out his hand to her and she took it clumsily. With significant effort on her part, she finally stood up and Severus was able to look at her. The woman appeared to be quite young, she was at least a foot shorter than Severus, with wavy honey coloured hair. She had an extremely beautiful face, and Severus had to wonder if she was Veela. Her eyes were the most striking feature on her face, a warm golden brown that he lingered more than he wanted to.

"I am so, so sorry!" exclaimed the woman frantically. "I think I packed too much…it's just…sort of everywhere". She looked hopelessly at the ground.

"May I ask who you are?"

"Oh! Yes, of course, I'm sorry - I'm Amaryllis Swan." She held out her hand. "I'm going to be teaching Muggle Studies this year."

"I see" said Severus flatly. He took her hand for only a moment, and tried not to let his thoughts wander to Charity Burbage, the previous Muggle Studies Professor.

"You can call me Milly if you prefer, I know Amaryllis can be a mouthful". She laughed nervously.

"I am Professor Severus Snape. I teach –"

"Defence Against the Dark Arts" Amaryllis said quickly. She looked bashful. "I did my research on all the staff before I got here." Severus said nothing. "Could you please you please direct me to the staff room?"

Severus groaned internally but nodded. She tried to pick up her belongings but seemed flustered, and Severus got the feeling that she felt nervous under his gaze, like many of his students. Exasperated and impatient, Severus waved his hand and her belongings packed themselves neatly into her suitcase, it then drifted off in the direction of Dumbledore's office. "It's fine" he said when he saw her startled expression. "It will return to you when your living quarters are allocated".

After what felt like an eternity of small talk, Severus and Amaryllis had finally reached the staff common room. Severus narrowed his eyes at Dumbledore whose expression seemed to be very amused at the sight of Severus and the younger woman. He took a seat next to Minerva McGonagall, who thankfully remained expressionless, and Amaryllis sat on his other. Horace Slughorn smiled widely at him from across the room.

"Thank you for joining us" said Dumbledore. "As you all know, the war is over, _but_, there is still fear amongst our students. There are families, who have with great difficulty, decided to allow their children to return to Hogwarts and it is our responsibility to ensure their safety and wellbeing. Death Eaters are still in hiding and while the Ministry is doing their best to find them, we should still be on alert here at Hogwarts. There will be students from Slytherin who will also be returning, and we must welcome them with open arms and not alienate them from the other students. There will also be two new students joining us that will be getting sorted today." Severus shared the same surprised expression the other staff members had upon hearing the last part of the news. Dumbledore, however, continued speaking. "At this time, I would like to welcome Amaryllis Swan, our new Muggle Studies Professor". He gestured for Amaryllis to stand up.

"Hi, I'm Amaryllis – as you heard just before." She laughed nervously again. "But you can call me Milly. I look forward to getting to know you all and working with you." She sat down almost immediately.

"Thank you, Amaryllis" said Dumbledore, smiling at her. "I would also like to welcome Sirius Black to our staff as our new flying instructor. I hope you all can make him feel welcome."

Severus's extremities felt numb in anger, he was sure Dumbledore had purposely chosen to not mention this to him before the school year began.

"Amaryllis" said Dumbledore, now looking at her. "I take it you will want to get settled into your living quarters. I hope you do not mind living in the quarters of our previous Muggle Studies Professor."

"Of course not, Albus" she said warmly. Her tone seemed eager to please.

"The password is 'buckbeak'. You may change it when you enter - Severus, if you don't mind, could you please show Amaryllis to her room?" he suggested. His blue eyes twinkled merrily.

"_Of course, Headmaster_" Severus answered sarcastically. He stood up. "This way." Without waiting on her answer, he spun on his heel, retreating from everybody before they could get the change to speak to him.

"I'm sorry that Albus is making you do this" said Amaryllis as she quickened her pace to keep up with him. "If you just give me the directions, I'm sure I can find it myself". Severus heard the doubt in her voice and slowed his pace, they walked silently before reaching Charity Burbage's old living quarters.

"This is your room" said Severus. He turned to leave when a loud bark stopped him in his tracks. _That better not be Black_, he thought with a sneer. He turned again to Amaryllis's direction, and watched a large, furry sheep dog run towards her happily.

"There you are!" exclaimed Amaryllis crossly, even though she was smiling. "I thought I'd have to send out a search party". She kneeled on the ground to pat the dog and it licked her face. Severus crinkld his nose. "This is Momo" she said, looking up at him. "I was scared I wasn't allowed to bring him to Hogwarts but Albus said he didn't mind thankfully!" _Momo_ left Amaryllis and began to sniff Severus's trousers with interest.

"Momo" she hissed and quickly pulled Momo away.

Amaryllis 

Though a little bare, her iving quarters looked quite homely.

"What do you think, Momo?' asked Amaryllis. She found the bedroom and flopped on to the bed. She patted the spot next to her, giving Momo permission to come on to the bed, he jumped up and curled himself next to her. As she began to pat him, Amaryllis thought about her interaction with Severus Snape, the Hogwarts staff member she felt the most nervous to meet. She guessed that he would be quiet, not much for small talk but he seemed polite. Albus and the rest of the staff seemed nice as well. She seemed to get on well with Minerva and Horace Slughorn, though the former, much like Severus, did not speak much. The exact opposite of Slughorn.

Amaryllis was excited to be going to the welcoming feast, she decided to wander the school grounds to help her relax. She walked slowly through the corridor, taking her time to look at every portrait. Near the staircase she saw Dumbledore talking to a dark-haired man.

"Amaryllis! I would like to introduce you to Sirius Black" said Dumbledore, when she neared them.

Sirius looked at her and smirked, and Amaryllis had to admit he was very attractive. She watched his grey eyes move up her body to her face, and while she wasn't vain, she could tell he was impressed. Having met men like Sirius before, Amaryllis merely smiled and held out her hand.

"Nice to meet you, Sirius" she said, as Sirius took her hand. "You can call me Milly if you like. I'll be teaching Muggle Studies."

"Likewise, _Milly"_ he said with a wink. Amaryllis internally rolled her eyes and let go of his hand. "You seem pretty young to be a professor."

"I'm not that young" insisted Amaryllis. "I'm 25."

"Well, I'm older than you and I consider myself pretty young, so you must be _really_ young" said Sirius. Amaryllis laughed awkwardly, not knowing what more to say.

"Anyway, I should get going" she said and pretended to look apologetic. "I was going to have a bit of a wander before the feast. It was nice meeting you" she quickly added. Sirius smirked at her again before turning his attention back to Dumbledore.

Severus 

It was almost 7pm, the students would arrive soon, and Severus would be seeing Sirius Black. _Typical_, he thought, that Sirius did not attend the staff meeting.

Severus arrived at the Great Hall to see students swarm in and fill the seats of their respective House tables. He took his seat on the right side of Dumbledore. Amaryllis Swan walked awkwardly to the table, clueless as to where she could sit.

"You may sit next to Severus, if you wish" suggested Dumbledore. He ignored the visible scowl Severus was giving him. Amaryllis looked apologetic as she sat down on the empty chair on Severus's other side. Sirius casually walked in to the Great Hall, snapping the attention from almost every female student, he sat next to Amaryllis.

"Snape" he acknowledged. Perhaps he was the only person whose opinion of Severus did not change. Sirius looked at him momentarily before turning his attention to Amaryllis.

"I'm so nervous!" She whispered loud enough that Severus could hear.

"Oh please, I'm sure they'll love you" replied Sirius. Severus rolled his eyes. He overlooked the students before catching Harry Potter's eye at the Gryffindor table. Unlike Sirius, Harry had developed respect for Severus. He noticed that Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger were looking at him as well, they looked away immediately as the three fell in to a whisper.

The two new students that Dumbledore had mentioned were both sorted in to Gryffindor.

After Dumbledore's annual speech, he introduced Sirius as the new flying instructor, which, as expected, was received with a loud cheer, especially from the Gryffindor table. Next, Amaryllis was introduced. She was well received as well, though she received additional catcalls and whistles, that the staff seemed displeased with and gave the students a warning glare. The feast began, and the Great Hall was filled with chatter and laughter. For the first time Severus was not bothered.

"So what school did you go to, Milly?" asked Sirius through a mouthful of chicken.

"I didn't actually go to school" replied Amaryllis "I mean I did - at the start - but then I dropped out". Severus's interest peeked. Sirius opened his mouth to respond but the booming voice of Rubeus Hagrid cut across him from the opposite end of the table.

"Nice ter meet yer, Am-pril-iz. Rubeus Hagrid" he introduced himself "I'm the Keeper o' Keys and Grounds here at Hogwarts, an' Professor o' Care o' Magical Creatures!" Severus noticed that Minerva looked particularly exasperated at Hagrid's voice so close to her ears.

"It's really nice to meet you!" Amaryllis yelled back. "It's actually Am-a-ri- liss but you can call me 'Milly!"

"Milly it is! I'll talk ter yeh later" said Hagrid.

Severus was relieved that they weren't talking to each other across him anymore, but it was short lived when he heard Sirius's voice.

"How are you settling in" he asked Amaryllis.

"Good!" she replied happily. "My room is nice and Momo's settling in well too."

"Who's Momo?"

"He's my dog -"

"Yeh got a dog?" Hagrid loudly interjected. Initially annoyed, Severus felt astounded that the the half man-half giant could hear Amaryllis from that distance.

"His name is Momo!" she yelled back to him.

"Yeh'll have ter introduce him ter my Fluffy!" Hagrid said in excitement. "I'm sure they'll ge' along!"

Severus pinched the bridge of his nose. He would be happy once the feast finished so he could go back to his quarters and be in solitude once again. He had done enough socialising for one day.

Harry 

Harry, Ron and Hermione were surprised that there were two new students at Hogwarts. He looked at his girlfriend Ginny Weasley, her expression was quizzical. The two students, both female and in seventh year, sat a couple of seats down from him. Harry noticed that they were being stared at by almost every student in the Great Hall. Neville Longbottom, who sat closest to the girls, spoke first.

"Hi, I'm Neville Longbottom" he said kindly. "Welcome to Gryffindor."

"I'm Anna Lindsay" one of the girls said shyly. She gave Neville a small smile. Harry noted that she was smaller than the other girl, with dirty blonde hair that was bushy like Hermione's. "This is Isabella Parish." She gestured to the other girl.

Isabella was taller and more athletically built than Anna. She also had blonde hair, but it was the colour of champagne, sleek and tied in to a tight ponytail. She was very attractive. Isabella didn't acknowledge Neville at all. She stood up, with a haughty expression painted on her face, and left the table without a word.

"Yeah, she barely spoke to me when we first met…" said Anna, she looked uneasily at Neville.

"Did she say her name was Parish?" whispered Ron so that only Harry and Hermione could hear him.

"Yes, why?" Hermione whispered back.

"The Parish's are a pure blood family, _like the Malfoys_" Ron said lowly. He looked at the spot Isabella had just vacated. "I wonder what she's doing here".


	2. Chapter 2

Harry

"I wonder what we're going to learn this year!" chirped Hermione excitedly, as she walked with Harry and Ron to Transfiguration.

"I don't even know why we're coming to school this year" Ron grumbled. "Wasn't the war class enough?"

"Ronald, we have to graduate - we've come so far."

"Come on, Fred and George didn't graduate and look at them!"

As they walked in to McGonagall's classroom, Harry saw Anna sitting by herself. He left Ron and Hermione, who were now bickering, and sat in the empty chair next to her.

"How are you liking Hogwarts so far?" he asked.

Anna looked startled. "Um...it's…Ok" she said. Ter voice was so quiet that Harry had to lean in to hear her. "I've barely gotten to know anyone to be honest."

"You can come sit with us any time, we'd love to get to know you better" Harry assured her. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Isabella walk in to the classroom. She had the same haughty expression she had at the welcoming feast and when her eyes met Harry's, she wrinkled her nose in distaste. Nevertheless, she sat in front of him and Anna.

"Hi Isabella" said Anna, her voice a little louder. Isabella turned to acknowledge her but said nothing, she turned to the front again.

"How are you finding Hogwarts" Harry asked. He decided he would not hold Isabella to her family's reputation. Maybe they could be friends too.

Isabella's shoulders slumped, as if exasperated, and she turned around with annoyed expression on her face. "Boring, I hate being here" she said, and with that she pushed her blonde hair to the side, turned around and didn't talk again for the rest of the class.

Severus 

It was lunch time and Severus had already grown tiresome of his students. His students for first period were first year Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff and then third year Slytherin and Gryffindor for second period. He had already handed out at least seven detentions. Walking at a steady pace to the Great Hall, he hoped he would not be bothered by anybody on his way to lunch. Unfortunately for him, Amaryllis had just stepped out of a classroom, not looking where she was going, as he found was a common occurrence for her, and she almost walked right in to him. She realised quickly this time but she dropped her books by surprise on Severus's feet.

"Sorry!" Amaryllis cried apologetically. She crouched to gather her books. "I'm such a klutz."

Severus said nothing with the hope that she would not try to further engage in conversation with him.

It was in vain.

"How's your morning been?" she asked while hurrying to keep in step with him as he continued to walk.

"How it has always been" replied Severus, not trying to hide the boredom dripping in his voice. "Yours?" he asked. He would at least attempt to be civil.

"It's been good!" she said in delight. "The students seem very interested. It's funny what seems normal to me is fascinating to them – they were so intrigued when I showed them a telephone!"

Severus, whose father was a Muggle, grew up in a household where muggle items were used frequently, and he was quite familiar with the telephone. "You find it normal, do you use one often?" he asked.

"Yeah, all the time. My phone bill can get pretty bad!"

Severus was surprised to hear she had close Muggle friends. He and Lily had also grown up around Muggles but neither were very close to them.

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis was relieved to reach the staff table. Talking to Severus was awkward, and she had gotten the distinct impression after their first meeting that he wasn't interested in any sort of friendship with her. Still, Amaryllis tried.

"What are you having for lunch today?"

"A sandwich" Severus replied. He gestured to his plate his place as if it were obvious.

"What class do you have after lunch?"

"Fifth years Hufflepuff and Slytherin."

"What are you teaching them?"

"Blocking spells."

"What blocking spells?"

Severus turned to her with narrowed eyes.

"Sorry, you probably want to eat" she mumbled. Severus turned his attention to his lunch. Thankfully in that same moment Sirius arrived. _Just in time to save me from further embarrassment_, Amaryllis thought grimly. "How was your morning?" she asked him.

"Really good" answered Sirius, he looked at the lunch options with visible distaste. "I mean it's a hell of a lot better than being stuck in an attic all day, that's for sure." Severus scoffed loudly from his seat on the other side of Amaryllis. "Oh yeah, got something to say Sniv – Snape?"

"No" he sneered.

"So what are you doing after lunch, Sirius?" said Amaryllis abruptly, hoping to steer the conversation.

"Free period!" Sirius exclaimed happily. "Might go see Hagrid, he's always a lot of fun."

Amaryllis had been meaning to visit Hagrid, but she hadn't had the time yet, she wished she also had a free period so she and Sirius could go see Hagrid together.

"How about you?"

"Fourth years Gryffindor and Ravenclaw. I hope they like the class."

"I'm sure they will, Muggle things are odd" said Sirius.

"I'm sure that's what Muggles think of our things" retorted Amaryllis in amusement. "What do you do in the night time? I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing when class isn't on."

"I don't know" said Sirius, shrugging. "Up to you - prepare for your next class, I guess." He stopped suddenly, and raised his eyebrows suggestively at her. "Or you could have fun…" Amaryllis rolled her eyes. "Well you know where I am" he continued when she didn't reply. "Except for tonight, I've got a hot date."

Sirius 

Sirius did not have a hot date. Instead, Dumbledore had organised for the members of the Order of the Phoenix to meet at Grimmauld Place to discuss the Death Eater situation. Sirius felt happy however to be seeing James, Remus, Lily, Tonks and Teddy who were all living there now. Only three years ago had he been living in an empty house, alone with a Hippogriff and a bitter house elf. Now, his best friends were back, and his house finally felt like a home. Harry also lived at Grimmauld Place and regularly invited the Weasley's and Hermione over, so the house was full almost every night.

"Sirius!"

Sirius spun around quickly recognizing Harry's voice.

"Harry! Ron!" he said cheerfully as they caught up to him. "How does it feel being back at Hogwarts?"

"Good…strange to be back to be honest" replied Harry thoughtfully. "Especially with Snape. Had him for Defence, it was sort of awkward."

"Yeah" agreed Ron. "_R__eally_ awkward."

"Can't say I've had a different experience" said Sirius, he tried to keep bitterness out of his voice. "Where's Hermione?"

"Library probably" replied Ron. "You'd think after everything she'd want to relax a bit." He paused for a moment. "What's the new Muggle Studies professor like?"

"Amar – I mean _Professor Swan_?" Sirius quickly corrected himself. "She's alright, nice, kind of chatty." He contemplated for a moment on whether to tell Harry about the Order meeting. Choosing in favour of his godson, he dropped his voice so that only Harry and Ron could hear. "Dumbledore wants us all to meet tonight."

"What?" said Harry, now frowning. "We never heard about it."

"I'm sure he didn't want to bother you" Sirius reasoned at once, sensing Harry's annoyance.

"Right. Yeah, because it's not like I defeated Voldemort or anything" said Harry lowly. "Guess he doesn't have to include me anymore."

Ron looked from Harry and Sirius tentatively, "We should get going" he said to Harry. "Mione's probably waiting for us. We'll see you later, Sirius."

"Yeah" muttered Harry.

"I'll bring it up tonight, Harry" said Sirius solemnly. "I promise."

Severus 

"Severus!" crowed the voice of Molly Weasley upon seeing him. "We just had dinner, would you like me to take you out a plate?"

"No thank you" replied Severus curtly.

"If you're sure" said Molly, her tone was laced with obvious disapproval. "Everybody is in the dining room."

Severus saw Lily straight away, his heart fluttered.

"You look tired, Sev" she joked when Severus sat down. He merely grinned at her in response. At the same time, James, who sat on her other side, turned to Severus and gave him a quick nod in greeting before turning back to Sirius, who seemed to be choking on his own laughter, and thumped his back.

"Thank God you're here now" said Lily lowly. "I've had to listen to this all night." She jerked her thumb at the group next to her. "How were classes today?

"Terrible" groaned Severus. "All the students are twits".

"I'm sure you're exaggerating" said Lily. She was silent after that, and Severus could tell she was having an internal debate with herself. "I saw Petunia today" she said finally.

"And?"

"It was…weird. I don't know how to act around her" explained Lily, she bit her lip. "I don't know whether to be happy to see her, grateful to her for keeping Harry under her roof or angry for the way she treated him…James and I only stayed for ten minutes."

Severus said nothing in response. His opinion of Petunia hadn't changed since the last time he saw her. Truthfully, he wanted to tell Lily to cut Petunia out of her life forever.

"Anyway." She shrugged, but then she inched closer to Severus. "How's things at school now that Sirius is there" she asked quietly so only he could hear her.

"I take no notice of him" Severus replied. "Especially now with the new Muggle Studies professor."

"Oh yes. I heard she's very attractive." She cocked an eyebrow at Severus.

_Of course_ Severus thought Amaryllis was attractive, but he felt uncomfortable telling Lily that.

"She's young. Talks too much" he said instead, and it wasn't an exaggeration.

Dumbledore walked in to the dining room then and all noise ceased.

"Thank you all for coming" he said, taking a seat. "As you know, Voldemort's followers are still –"

"Sorry, I'm late" interrupted Bill Weasley, He and his wife Fleur walked to the dining room, he looked at Dumbledore bashfully and mumbled a small "_Sorry_" before taking a seat next to Molly.

"As I was saying" Dumbledore continued. "Voldemort's followers are still a risk. The Ministry are utilizing their every efforts to find them but it's proving difficult. We have reason to believe they are in gathering headed by Bellatrix Lestrange".

Sirius snorted. "Great, I'd love to see her again" he said vehemently. "So what's the plan?"

"We must remain vigilant" Dumbledore instructed.

There was a long stretch of silence.

"That's it?" Sirius asked incredulously. "Bloody hell, if we wanted _that_ advice we could have just asked Mad Eye." He jerked his thumb in the mentioned wizard's direction. Severus noted that Nymphadora looked away at once and Bill seemed to be smothering a fit of laughter.

"This is all I have to say on the matter at this time" Dumbledore said calmly. Severus sensed that the Headmaster knew a great deal more but was concealing it from the members of the Order.

"Fine" snapped Sirius, as impatient as he was before. "What about Harry, why couldn't he be included in this meeting?"

"He's at _school_, Sirius" Molly cut in quickly, before Dumbledore could answer.

"He defeated Voldemort, Molly!" Sirius shot back just as quickly. "He should be included in all of this."

"I agree with Sirius" said James.

Sirius opened his mouth again to speak but Dumbledore had already stood up.

"For now this is my request" he said with finality, and he exited the dining room with nothing more.

"What was the point in this meeting?" asked Nymphadora, just as confused as everybody else.


	3. Chapter 3

Amaryllis 

The Christmas snow had begun to fall and soon many students would be leaving to go home for Christmas break. Amaryllis had enjoyed her time at Hogwarts and had become well acquainted with many of the members of staff, Sirius especially. Their friendship had blossomed unexpectedly, and most of their free time was spent together.

"So what are you doing for Christmas?" Sirius asked Amaryllis one afternoon. It was the weekend and together they visited Hagrid.

"Probably nothing" Amaryllis answered truthfully.

"If that's the case, come spend it at my place!" Sirius offered eagerly. "Everyone will be there."

"I don't want to intrude…" She took a sip of her tea quickly so she didn't have to say more.

"Come off it, plus you won't have to see Snape."

Amaryllis had told Sirius of the tension between her and Severus, it still hadn't changed after so many months and she was convinced he didn't like her. She turned to Hagrid, hoping to change the subject.

"What are you doing Ha – No, don't give him any food, he's been getting fed too much!" cried Amaryllis, pulling Momo away from the table.

"Probably will be 'ere" replied Hagrid, chuckling when Momo ran away from Amaryllis back to his side.

"Hagrid, you'll be spending Christmas with us too" Sirius said sincerely.

...

It was late at night and after leaving an intoxicated Sirius at Hagrid's hut, Amaryllis walked back to her quarters. When she heard a loud groan, she spun around quickly to where the sound came from and found Severus hunching over in pain near the stairs.

"Severus!" she shrieked, and rushed over to him. She gasped when she saw that his front was covered in blood. "Severus, what happened?"

When he said nothing, Amaryllis, without thinking, quickly put her hands on his chest and a white light emerged. Severus whipped out his wand in lightning speed, though it was obvious doing so had caused him immense pain, and pointed it straight at her.

"What did you do?" he asked menacingly.

"Severus please!" cried Amaryllis. "I'm not trying to hurt you, I just want to help. I can heal you, _I promise_". Severus looked at her, narrowing his eyes, before he carefully lowered his wand, although slightly. She took it as a good sign and cautiously touched Severus's arm and led him to the nearest empty classroom where she sat him on a chair and closed the door.

"Can I just?" asked Amaryllis, motioning to Severus's chest. He grunted his permission. She unbuttoned his coat so that he was only wearing his undershirt, then put her hands on his chest once again. The white light emerged and she closed her eyes and waited until she felt his wounds had completely healed. When she was satisfied, she took her hands off Severus's chest and took a step back.

"Are you OK?" she asked warily. She tried not to make any sudden movements in case it alarmed him.

"Yes."

"What happened to you?"

"Nothing" he answered bluntly, but he looked at her curiously. "How did you do that?"

"You answer my question first" quipped Amaryllis. "What happened to you?" she repeated.

_"My enemies_" he replied sarcastically. "Now answer my question."

She sighed at that. "I don't know to be honest" Amaryllis answered truthfully. "I've just always been able to do it."

"I see" was all Severus said, and without saying anymore, he walked to the door, but he stopped momentarily before opening it. "Thank you." Then he was gone.

Severus 

Severus had gone to Dumbledore straight after his encounter with Amaryllis and told him the events of the night, that he had been attacked in Knockturn Alley, but more importantly, that Amaryllis had healed him with her hands.

He left his quarters in the morning and headed to the Great Hall for breakfast. When he turned the corner, he, unsurprisingly, almost ran in to Amaryllis.

"We really should stop meeting like this" she joked, and as if she had just realised her surroundings, her expression became serious. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine."

"Sorry if freaked you out last night" Amaryllis said dejectedly. "I just got really scared when I saw you."

Severus felt guilty then, that even after he was constantly rude to her, she was still willing to help him, and was always nice to him. "No need to apologize" he said. "Thank you for last night". Amaryllis's eyebrows raised for a moment, perhaps in surprise to his gratitude.

"You're welcome" she said. "And if anything ever happens like that again, you could always come to me - though I'll probably have to start charging if it happens too often." She laughed when Severus narrowed his eyes at her. "I should get going" she said after sobering up. "Albus wants to see me."

"I did tell him about last night" Severus admitted.

Amaryllis smiled weakly at him before walking away in the direction of Dumbledore's office.

Amaryllis

Amaryllis felt nervous walking into Albus's office. There was a reason she didn't tell people about her healing abilities, she was scared they would think she was _different_. Amaryllis heard a quiet screech and smiled when she saw a Phoenix bird in the middle of the office. She walked carefully to the bird, so not to scare it, and gently stroked its feathers. "Hey" she said softly.

"She is beautiful, isn't she?" said Albus fondly. Amaryllis jumped slightly and she looked around until she found him admiring the Phoenix from the staircase winding up in the office. "How are you this morning?"

"I'm well" Amaryllis answered with a steady voice. "I know Severus told you about last night" she added quickly, and then chided herself mentally for not asking Albus how he was.

"If you are concerned, you needn't be" said Albus calmly. "I just wanted to speak to you to understand how your abilities work."

Amaryllis bit her lip."Like I said to Severus, it's just always been there, I guess. I don't know how I do it, I just can." She didn't know what more to tell Albus, she could barely understand it herself.

"May I see how it works?" he asked politely.

"Sure…I mean I can't just do it like that. I need a wound" she said hesitantly. Albus waved his hand leisurely and a deep gash appeared on his other hand. Amaryllis, alarmed, rushed to him in an instant and took his hand in her own. She held his hand with her left hand and put her right hand over the gash, she focused on healing him and a white light emerged, and she waited until she felt the wound had healed before letting his hand go. She waited for him patiently. Albus seemed unbothered when he inspected his hand. Amaryllis, on the other hand, felt extremely nervous. Moments passed in silence until Albus spoke finally.

"I would like to invite you to join the Order of the Phoenix" he said simply. "It's a secret society I assembled to oppose Voldemort during his terror. I believe you would be an asset to it."

Amaryllis took a second to comprehend what had just been said to her. "I – of course I would" she said quickly. "But I don't know what I could bring to it…Sure, I can heal people, but healing can be done by anyone."

"It can, but not as instantaneous or as thorough as you can do it" said Albus, then he smiled. "You'll be our very own Phoenix."

Severus 

Severus was irritated when he spoke to Dumbledore that afternoon, he was not pleased at the idea of Amaryllis joining the Order.

"I should never have told you about her" he spat.

"I believe Amaryllis would be an asset to the Order" said Dumbledore, unphased by Severus's tone. "Think of how immediate her healing ability is."

"Why is the Order still running at all?" asked Severus. "The Dark Lord has been defeated, this is the Ministry's business now."

"The Ministry is still rebuilding, Severus. I trust the Order."

Severus said nothing, he only hoped Dumbledore knew what he was doing.

Amaryllis 

"So you can heal people" said Sirius doubtfully. "With your hands?"

"Yes" sighed Amaryllis. She had invited Sirius to her living quarters in the evening to fill him in on the events of the previous night.

"Can you show me?" he asked curiously. She said nothing but put her hand on his knuckles where there were some visible cuts. The white light emerged, and she waited until she felt the cuts were healed. She looked up at Sirius whose eyebrows were now so high it almost reached his hair line.

"_What the –_" he yelped.

"Don't freak out!"

Sirius shut his eyes for a few moments before he became calm again. "So what did Dumbledore say?" he asked Amaryllis warily.

"Not much" she lied. Albus had told her that the Order of the Phoenix was a secret society, and she was half sure Sirius knew about it but didn't mention it just in case.

"That's…I mean, OK" muttered Sirius. He stopped suddenly and adopted a more serious expression. "So someone attacked Snape?"

"Apparently" sighed Amaryllis. "Though he didn't say much more about it, as you can imagine."

Sirius didn't say anything and Amaryllis could tell he was still processing all this new information.

"Have you given any more thought to spending Christmas at my place?" he asked suddenly.

Amaryllis racked her brains for any excuse she could give Sirius. "I have things to do" she said lamely, but when Sirius looked at her doubtfully, she threw her hands up in defeat. "Oh, alright then, but as long as it's OK with everyone!"

"Of course! Everyone will be happy to have you there" replied Sirius cheerfully.


	4. Chapter 4

Harry

Harry was excited to be going home for Christmas. He would of course miss Christmas at Hogwarts, which he had grown to enjoy since his first year, but this would be the first holiday he spent with his parents. He closed his suitcase and headed to breakfast. Hogwarts had been decorated in its usual festivity and Harry couldn't help but feel a little nostalgic that this would be the last time he would see it. He was about to go to the Gryffindor table when he saw Luna Lovegood sitting by herself at the Ravenclaw table.

"Hi Luna" said Harry, taking a seat next to her. "Going home for Christmas?"

"Oh yes" she replied in her dreamy voice. "Daddy and I will be looking for Crumple-Horned Snorkacks."

"Oh right" said Harry. "Well Mum wanted me to ask you and your Dad over for Christmas, but if you two have other plans…I'll send you an owl anyway."

"I'll ask Daddy when I go home – Oh hello, Bella."

"Going home?" asked Isabella. She didn't acknowledge Harry.

"Yes, Daddy and I will be looking for Crumple-Horned Snorkacks" repeated Luna. "Are you going home?"

Isabella sighed, "I guess so. Anyway, have a good Christmas" she said, before walking off in the direction of Gryffindor Tower.

Harry was surprised, he hadn't seen Isabella talk to anybody since she had arrived. "What's she like" he asked Luna curiously.

"Oh, she's lovely" said Luna, and she smiled.

Sirius 

It was Christmas Day and Sirius couldn't be happier. It was a full house with James, Remus, Lily, Tonks, Teddy, Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny, with the rest of the Weasleys and members of the Order coming over later in the day. Everybody had gathered in the living room to open gifts, the atmosphere was filled with laughter and Christmas cheer.

"Teddy gets to open the first gift!" James suggested over the noise. Everybody agreed, and Sirius went to the Christmas tree and found his gift for Teddy.

"There you go, Mr Lupin" said Sirius kneeling to Teddy's height. Everybody watched as the small child opened his gift, it was a mini broomstick, much like the one Sirius had given to Harry for his first Christmas. Sirius caught Lily's eye and she gave him a knowing look while James patted him on the back affectionately. After Teddy, everybody opened their gifts and went in to the dining room to have Christmas breakfast.

"So who's yet to come?" asked Remus, passing Tonks a piece of toast.

"The Weasleys" replied Sirius through a mouthful of eggs. "And the Order, and Milly" he finished.

Lily looked at Sirius's table manners and shook her head. "Hopefully you won't be talking with your mouth full when Amaryllis is here" she said.

"Nah, she's seen me eat plenty of times" reasoned Sirius. "I asked her to come over earlier, but she thought maybe you lot," Sirius looked at Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny, "would find it odd having a teacher at home".

"She shouldn't have" said Hermione frowning. "Ginny's the only one who has her class."

"Do you know everyone thinks you and Professor Swan are dating, Sirius?" said Ginny.

"Sirius? _Dating_?" James spluttered; his food began to fall out of his mouth in coughs. Lily thumped his back.

"Shut up Prongs" laughed Sirius. "I've heard, but it's nothing like that, she's a really good friend, kind of like a little sister to be honest."

"Keekee" babbled Teddy happily when Kreacher came to the table. Sirius had noticed that Kreacher had become very fond of the small child and was never far from him. He assumed Kreacher was reminded of Regulus when he saw Teddy, who was also the youngest member of the Black family.

"Happy Christmas, Kreacher" said Sirius, holding his goblet up to the elf.

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis was feeling extremely nervous about spending Christmas with Sirius's family. She looked in the mirror and straightened out her outfit. It was a dark green mid length dress that she had made specially for the season. She took the hair rollers out of her hair and fixed it in to loose waves. Her makeup was very simple, with a bright red lip colour. Sirius has also invited Momo, so she tied a little red bowtie on his collar. She didn't know what gift to get Sirius's family, so she just put together a Christmas hamper full of sweets. She took one last look at herself and apparated to Grimmauld Place.

When she arrived Amaryllis was greeted by at least ten red heads. A short, plump woman pushed through the crowd and smiled warmly at her, pulling her inside the dining room.

"You must be Amaryllis" she said kindly. "I'm Molly Weasley, my daughter Ginny is in one your classes."

"Very nice to meet you Molly, Ginny is a wonderful student!" exclaimed Amaryllis. "Happy Christmas!" she added and gave Molly the hamper. She waved at Sirius when she spotted him and made her way towards him. Momo ran in to the crowd.

"Happy Christmas, Sirius" said Amaryllis cheerfully, as Sirius engulfed her in a hug.

"Happy Christmas to you too" he replied. "Thanks for coming. You could put your things…" he looked around, "wherever you can find a place" he laughed. "I'll introduce you to everyone!"

"Everyone!" he shouted suddenly, so that everybody stopped what they were doing and looked in his direction. "This is Amaryllis Swan – Milly for short" he added, giving her a wink. "And Milly, this is," he gestured to each person, "James, Lily, Tonks – who will hex you if you call her Nymphadora, Remus, Teddy, Bill, Fleur, Charlie, Molly, Arthur, Kingsley and you already know Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny". Amaryllis waved hello to them weakly before they all dispersed again. She saw Tonks and sat down in the empty chair next to her.

"Wotcher Amy" said the pink-haired woman. Amaryllis laughed.

"It's Amaryllis – but like Sirius said, you can just call me Milly."

"That'll do it" said Tonks sheepishly. "So, how are you liking Hogwarts?"

"It's great, I love it and I love teaching my class."

"Oh yeah, heard its Muggle Studies. Dad's a Muggleborn so we used Muggle stuff growing up" Tonks explained. "It's easier to use than some magic, ya know?"

"Definitely. Do you still use anything?"

"Mm, not really. I mean it is a little easier, but magic is just so convenient."

"Severus! Glad you could make it!" boomed a voice through the room.

Amaryllis, who had just put a glass of pumpkin juice to her lips, almost choked. She turned around and saw Severus standing in the doorway in his usual stoic manner. Arthur shook his hand "Happy Christmas" he said, smiling warmly as he led Severus inside

"Didn't think he'd come," said Tonks in low voice. "But he probably did for Lily."

Amaryllis felt a slight pang of jealousy when she heard Tonks say that, but she ignored it and tried to take a drink again. She looked to where Severus was again and saw he was talking to Lily now. She felt the pang again, though she couldn't understand why.

"Yeah, probably" she muttered. "What's Lily like?" she asked suddenly, though casually.

"She's really nice" answered Tonks. "Everything we've heard about her and all. Do you want me to introduce you two?"

"No!" Amaryllis cried at once. "I mean, she's already busy" she added quickly when Tonks raised her eyebrows.

"Come on" said Tonk. She handed Teddy to Remus and pulled Amaryllis up by the hand, "Seriously, let's just…walk around".

Amaryllis rolled her eyes. "Feels like I'm in school again" she said sarcastically.

Tonks laughed. "How old are you anyway?"

"25"

"Me too!"

They walked around the room and spoke to a couple of people before reaching Severus and Lily.

"Wotcher Lily" said Tonks, pulling Amaryllis unsubtly so she stood next to Severus. She turned to Lily, "This is Amaryllis, she's been wanting to meet you."

Amaryllis blushed.

"Yeah, you're one my Heroes" she stammered lamely, before realising how stupid she sounded.

Lily laughed. "Oh that's very kind of you to say" she said. "So how are you finding Hogwarts? Hope Sev hasn't given you any trouble." She grinned at Severus, but he only rolled his eyes.

Amaryllis, who had purposely not looked in the direction of Severus the whole time, finally looked up at him and gave him a weak smile. "Umm, yeah, Hogwarts is great. Severus is…nice" she said, ignoring Tonks who was silently sniggering next to her. "Anyway, I just wanted to say Hello – and Happy Christmas, um – to both of you. I'll see you later." And with that she grabbed Tonks's hand and left. When they returned to their seats, Tonks burst out laughing.

"I just met you, but I already hate you" grumbled Amaryllis.

"God, you were worse than me when I first met Remus" said Tonks, after sobering up. "So you fancy Snape, eh?"

"What?!" spluttered Amaryllis. "I do not." Tonks looked her doubtfully. "He just intimidates me, that's all."

"Sure sure…Anyway, he seemed pretty impressed with you. He gave you a good once over."

"No, he did not"

"He did! I saw him!" said Tonks triumphantly. "You are wearing his House colours after all…"

In that moment she noticed that Albus had arrived and everybody was waiting their turn to give him their Christmas wishes. When she approached him, he asked if he could speak privately with her.

"There will be an Order meeting tomorrow night, I hope you will make it" he said. Out of the corner of Amaryllis's eye, she could see Severus looking in their direction.

"Yeah sure, where is it?" she asked.

"Here. Everybody here is a member of the Order" said Albus. "Oh, and Amaryllis -" She looked at him. "Happy Christmas."

Severus

Severus had enjoyed Christmas for the first time in years, and he was the happiest to have spent it in part with Lily, even if she was with her husband and son. He decided to spend the next couple of days at Spinners End to tidy up his house.

And then it was raining, and he wanted nothing more than to relax before the Order meeting. He decided to open the gifts he had received the day before at the party and via owl. He opened Lily's first: it was a dark green leather-bound diary with his name embossed on the cover in black. He opened the book and breathed in the scent of the pages for a long stretch of time before putting it down. He opened his other gifts more books and even a watch from Harry. He put the watch on his wrist and hid it under the cuff of his coat. Finally, he saw a gift from Amaryllis. He felt guilty as he had not even thought about getting her a gift. He opened the delicate wrapping paper and saw that she had gotten him a new undershirt, much like the one he had been wearing the day he had been attacked. It was very thoughtful; he would thank her when he saw her at the meeting. Severus thought about Amaryllis then, she had looked exceptionally beautiful at the Christmas party.

He heard a knock on his door. Confused, as he didn't regularly have guests, he walked downstairs and opened the door. It was Lily.

"Hi Sev." She appeared to be wet from the rain. "Is it Ok if I came in?"

"Of course" replied Severus automatically. Lily walked inside and stood in the middle of his living room, she waved her wand and became dry instantly. "Is everything alright, Lily?"

"Oh! Yes, everything is fine. I just – I just feel like we haven't had a proper chance to talk since this all has happened" explained Lily. And then suddenly, she threw her arms around him and began to sob, burying her face in to his chest. Severus was caught by surprise but welcomed her embrace, they stood like that several minutes. When she pulled away from him, there were still tears running down her cheeks. "Severus, I am so, _so_ _sorry _for not forgiving you in school, and I am _so thankful_ for everything you did for Harry" she cried.

"I did it for you" Severus said bluntly.

Lily sat down on a sofa and put her face in her hands. "Where does this leave us though? I feel so _awful _that you have to always see James and I together."

"Nothing has to change, Lily" said Severus. He bent on one knee so that he was on the level as Lily. "Seeing you with Potter, it does hurt but I have accepted that you are in love with him, that you are married, and you have a son. You will always be my best friend, and nothing will ever change that."


	5. Chapter 5

Harry

Harry was glad to be included in the Order again. It was almost 6pm and most members had gathered around the dining room. He had also been informed earlier that Amaryllis Swan had been asked by Dumbledore to join the Order, she and Snape were yet to arrive. Harry heard a loud crack and Amaryllis entered the room, she smiled at everybody and sat in the closest chair available next to Remus, who courteously switched seats with Tonks, so she could sit next to Amaryllis. Snape arrived shortly after that and sat in his usual seat closest to Dumbledore.

"I wonder what Dumbledore has to tell us" Hermione whispered to Harry and Ron.

"Don't know, everyone looks worried though" Harry whispered back.

There was another loud crack and Dumbledore walked in to the room, behind him was Isabella Parish. Harry looked at Ron and Hermione who equally shared his shock.

"Thank you all for coming tonight. I would like to firstly welcome our two new members Amaryllis Swan _and _Isabella Parish" said Dumbledore. He paused. "Isabella has been acting as a spy for me to know Death Eater intel."

There was a moment of silence and suddenly, as Dumbledore was sure to have expected, an outburst of protest.

_"You can't be serious, Albus!"_

_"She's only a girl!"_

_"Are you out of your mind?!"_

"Isabella knows what she is doing," said Dumbledore calmly. "If you would please?" He gestured for Isabella to talk.

"Look, I know you all thinking I'm crazy" she said impatiently. "But like Dum – _Professor _Dumbledore said, I know what I'm doing. Everyone trusts me because my family are pureblood, they think I feel the same way as they do –"

"How can they trust you if you're in Gryffindor?" Harry interjected.

"I've made them believe I purposely got sorted in Gryffindor to get closer to you –"

"Well, how do we know we can trust you?"

"Well, it's me or nothing" Isabella countered. "Besides, it's a good thing I've gotten to talk to you all now. Bellatrix has a hard on for Professor Swan – maybe because she's a Muggleborn, maybe because she thinks you're dating Professor Black. I don't know, but I wouldn't be anywhere alone for a while, they know where you live". Everybody turned to Amaryllis, who was stunned.

"Ok firstly, Milly and I aren't seeing each other" said Sirius exasperated. "secondly, what are we supposed to do now then? Milly, you're living here" he decided.

"Sirius, you're being overdramatic" said Amaryllis. "I can take care of myself, I'll just have to put more wards up around my house."

"I don't think you're taking this seriously, Bellatrix _killed _me…and I'm her flesh and blood!" exclaimed Sirius. "And you're a Muggleborn so who knows what she'll do to you."

"Look, I gotta get back home before anybody notices I've been away for too long" said Isabella, impatiently. She looked at Harry. "Don't try and talk to me at all school, got it? There are still eyes everywhere." And with that, she nodded at Dumbledore and quickly exited the room. There was a loud crack, before another outburst of protests.

Severus 

Severus was furious at Dumbledore for allowing Isabella to become a spy for him.

"Are you out of your mind, Headmaster!" h fumed. "She's a student, she could get killed! Are you sure you want that on your conscience?"

"I have full faith in Isabella" said Dumbledore evenly.

"But full faith doesn't guarantee her safety" Severus spat, continuing his tirade. "What will happen if they find out about her? I've met her mother and father; they won't hesitate to kill her –"

"We will protect her in any case –"

"And how do you know you can even trust her?" asked Severus. He too angry to let Dumbledore speak.

"I met Isabella after I received sources that, unbeknownst to her family, she was hiding Muggleborns in her family's summer house" explained Dumbledore calmly. "I approached her privately and spoke to her about becoming a spy and she was more than happy to do it. I believe she is like Sirius, a black sheep in her family. I trust her, and so should you Severus."

Severus didn't say anything, not trusting what would come out anymore. "What about Amaryllis Swan?" he asked instead.

"I have increased the warding in her house and she feels competent enough to remain living in there safely" replied Dumbledore.

Severus didn't seem as convinced. He had never seen Amaryllis raise her voice let alone fight somebody.

"Severus, if you are worried about her, perhaps you should pay her a visit" suggested Dumbledore. Severus said nothing, leaving Dumbledore angrier than when he arrived.

….

Severus had many things on his mind but the one thing that bothered him the most was that he wasn't in control anymore as he had been when he had been a spy. In a twisted way, Severus almost felt _envious_ that Isabella was now the spy. She would be the one who knew everything, she would be reporting to Dumbledore. There was a weird power surge that came with being the position.

He sighed and sat back in his chair. Now time went slow for him, and he had far _too much_ of it. Severus concluded after much internal debate, that while he could not help Isabella, he could still help Amaryllis and decided to check the wards around her house and see if she was safe. He had noted that after Sirius had announced that he and Amaryllis were not together, she had come more frequently in to Severus's thoughts and he suddenly noticed more of her attributes. Severus scoffed, the idea of being with Amaryllis was absurd, he was still in love with Lily, and even if he wasn't, Amaryllis was young and beautiful and nice – what would she want with someone like _him_? He hesitated at the thought of going to her house but convinced himself it was a matter of her safety.

Severus apparated to the address Dumbledore had given him, she lived in an apartment building. He knocked on her door and heard a dog's bark in the distance, that came closer and closer. Amaryllis opened the door and immediately whipped out her wand when she saw him.

"What was the first password to my quarters?" asked Amaryllis emotionlessly. Severus was impressed that she had used this tactic to identify him.

"_Buckbeak_" he answered. Amaryllis lowered her wand and gave Severus a sheepish smile.

"Sorry, just have to do it for precautionary reasons" she said and opened her door wider so he could come inside.

"No need to apologise." He looked around her home, it was quite small. He noticed that there were newspapers and books piled on every corner, clothes hanging off the furniture.

"Sorry about the mess" Amaryllis said, sheepish again. She quickly picked up clothes from the chair that was closest to Severus. "I swear I'm not this messy, I'm just trying to clean up the house before I go back to Hogwarts – I'll make some tea!"

"No need, I'll be leaving shortly" said Severus "I just wanted to check if everything was alright here."

"Oh please Severus, it's the first time you've come to my house, just one drink?" she pleaded. Severus was used to drinks stronger than tea but nodded his approval and Amaryllis quickly disappeared. He looked around her house and saw several photographs on one wall, he noticed that none of them moved and deduced they were all memories Amaryllis had made with her Muggle friends. No one in any of the photos looked to be older than her and Severus wondered where the photos of her parents were.

"They're all the poor souls that have had to deal with me over the years" said Amaryllis. She brought over to him a tray with two cups of tea and a plate of cakes on it. "Try the cake, I made the it this morning!"

Severus sat down on the cleared chair and Amaryllis placed his cup of tea and a saucer with a piece of cake on it on his side of the table. With his fork, he broke off a piece of the cake and put it in his mouth. It was _terrible_. He quickly swallowed it and grabbed his cup of tea, taking a giant swig of it to wash down the taste of the cake. Severus almost gagged when the tea tasted just as awful. He cleared his throat.

"It's good" he lied. Amaryllis picked off a piece of her own cake and gave it to Momo, he took it in his mouth but dropped it moments later behind Amaryllis's chair.

"How's the rest of your break gone" she asked.

"Uneventful" replied Severus. He crossed his ankles in front of him. "I haven't had this much spare time to myself in years."

"Ah, so now I know the real reason why you came here" jested Amaryllis. And then she suddenly stopped smiling. "It's pretty scary about Isabella Parish, huh? How do you feel about it?"

"I think Dumbledore is out of his mind" said Severus truthfully. "_But_ I'm sure he knows what he's doing – How do you feel about being a target?"

"I'm not that shocked to be honest. I'm a Muggleborn, was born to the life" she replied coolly. Severus rolled his eyes.

"I don't like to agree with Black, but you should be taking it more seriously" he said.

"I know, I know" sighed Amaryllis. "And I am! Didn't you see how I greeted you earlier?"

Severus raised his eyebrows but chose to drop the topic, "I see you don't have any photos of your parents" he said, fractioning his head slightly to the wall of photos.

"I didn't really know my parents to be honest" said Amaryllis. "They died when I was really young. I was raised in an orphanage."

Severus did not expect that. "I'm sorry to hear that" he said.

"It's OK, I've never really felt their absence to be honest" said Amaryllis. She shrugged. "Are you looking forward to going back to school tomorrow?"

"It's something to kill the time" scoffed Severus. "In fact, I should be leaving to prepare myself for tomorrow's onslaught."

Amaryllis laughed. "Come on, it's not that bad" she said, shaking her head in amusement. "Thanks for coming over Severus, it was nice getting to talk to you for once." She smiled at him. Severus nodded curtly, apparating back to Spinner's End once Amaryllis closed her door.

Isabella 

Isabella was glad to be going back to Hogwarts soon. In her mind, Christmas break couldn't end soon enough. She folded the last item of clothing and closed her suitcase, then flopped on to her bed. She closed her eyes and gripped the beaded necklace she was wearing hidden under her blouse. Suddenly, there were footsteps outside her door and she sensed somebody was about to come in to her bedroom. She sat up quickly, grabbed her hairbrush from on top of her nightstand and began brushing her hair. She heard her doorknob turn and her mother, Calista, entered the room. Saying nothing, she handed Isabella a card.

_'You are invited to celebrate the renewal of vows of Wes and Calista Parish'_

Isabella internally snorted; how her parents could believe that there was still love in the family was beyond her. She stood up and forced a wide smile.

"How exciting, Mother! When did you and Father decide to do this?" she asked, her voice dripping with fake enthusiasm.

Calista sniffed, and she wiped her nose daintily with a tissue. "Just last night. Bellatrix would like us all to have a _meeting_, but we can't meet all together with the Ministry watching our every move. Your father planned this _event_ as cover it up."

_Of course._ "Oh, of course" said Isabella. "When is it?"

"Soon" replied Calista. "Not enough time to prepare the decorations though, unfortunately."

_Who cares._ "I'm sure you'll figure it out, Mother – besides, it shouldn't really matter if there isn't going to be a real event."

Calista looked at her daughter as if she had just called her a derogatory name. "It is a matter of our family's reputation, Isabella" she in a clipped tone. "Bellatrix has given us the honour of holding the meeting in _our_ house."

Isabella internally snorted again. "Of course, Mother. My apologies. What is it?" she repeated.

"Wednesday evening" sighed Calista.

Isabella's fists clenched beside her. "What?" she cried. "But I'll miss out on it, Mother!"

She panicked. If she couldn't be at the meeting, she wouldn't be able to know what Bellatrix was planning. Calista sighed again and took the hairbrush still in Isabella's hand, and gestured for Isabella to sit down so she could brush her hair.

"It will be alright, Bella. It's just a meeting" said Calista.

"But Mother, I would like to go" pleaded Isabella. She winced in pain as her mother gripped her hair tightly in her hands to tie it into a sleek ponytail. "I have to make a good impression on Bellatrix!"

"Isabella, enough" snapped Calista, gripping her hair tighter.

"Can you at least tell me what happens in the meeting by owl?" Isabella asked. Her eyes were watering now – the pain was almost unbearable. She could feel hair strands snap from the root.

"No, it would be far too risky to have it in writing" her mother concluded. She finished tying the elastic in Isabella's hair and turned her around. "Isabella, you are acting like a brat."

"Sorry Mother, I just want to be a part of it" mumbled Isabella. Calista considered her daughter for a moment, in what Isabella thought was _sadness, _but it was short lived, and she stood up as if she had just realised where she was and walked out of the room without closing the door. Isabella stood up and closed the door herself before collapsing weakly on to her bed. She would have to tell Dumbledore as soon as possible.


	6. Chapter 6

Amaryllis

Amaryllis was glad to be back at Hogwarts. She was eager to start her classes again and was looking forward to what the new term would bring. She was especially happy now that she had moved past her awkward phase with Severus and she hoped that they could become better friends with time.

She set up her classroom; this term she would be teaching her fifth-year students about Muggle Wars, focusing especially on World War II and comparing Voldemort's terror to that of Adolf Hitler, to help the students get some perspective.

She was finishing up a poster when there was a knock on the door. She looked up and saw it was Severus, and gestured for him to enter.

"Just getting ready for class" Amaryllis said happily. "I'm really excited for this term. How are you feeling?"

Severus grunted in response. He picked up one of the posters on her desk. "Hitler?"

"Yeah, he's the Muggle equivalent to Voldemort" described Amaryllis. She then quickly looked around. "Have you heard anything from Albus?" she asked quietly.

"No" said Severus. "I would assume it would be very difficult for _them_ to meet with him without it looking suspicious – It was always easy with me because I was staff member."

"Maybe they can talk to their _Head of House_, and they could talk to Albus for them?" suggested Amaryllis.

"Again, too suspicious" said Severus. "They're in that House for a reason, they have no business with the Head of House."

"What if –"

"Hey Milly" Sirius interrupted, walking in to the classroom now. "I hope you weren't planning on eating all the sweets that were in your –" He stopped short when he saw Severus. "Snape."

"Black."

"We were just discussing what happened over the Christmas" Amaryllis said, sensing tension. "And we were trying to figure out how _they_ are going to talk to Albus."

"Well I'm surprised you're still racking your brains" said Sirius dryly. "You'd think Snape would have all the answers."

Severus didn't respond. He merely turned on his heel and exited the classroom.

Amaryllis frowned at Sirius. "Sirius, did you have to say all that?" she asked.

"Honestly, am I the only one who sees Snape for what he really is?" growled Sirius. He threw his hands up in frustration. "I don't know why we're all _kissing his arse_ suddenly. He was a Death Eater, Milly. Dumbledore didn't _ask_ him to become a Death Eater, he was one already. That was his own choice." He paused for a moment. "And what if Harry hadn't been the Chosen One? What if it were the Longbottoms who were in place of Lily? He wouldn't have cared then, would he have?"

" I don't know, Sirius" said Amaryllis patiently. "Look, he made a mistake and he's made up for it now – why can't you move past it?"

_"Move past it?"_ seethed Sirius, and then – "MOVE PAST IT? YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING! I SPENT TWELVE YEARS IN AZKABAN FOR A CRIME I DIDN'T COMMIT AND HE WAS LIVING IT UP AS A DEATH EATER – FREE! AND I'M SUPPOSED TO MOVE PAST IT?" He kicked a desk in anger, now breathing heavily.

Amaryllis stood, frozen, and wide eyed with shock. "I – I don't know what to say to you, Sirius" she said in small voice. "I'm sorry for what happened to you. I just – I just don't know what blaming Severus will do. That was all I was trying –"

"Of course you wouldn't get it, now you're all _cosy_ with him" Sirius spat.

"What are you talking about, Sirius?"

"Oh, don't try to play innocent" he said lowly. I saw you and Tonks at the Christmas party. Honestly, you looked like a fool."

Amaryllis was hurt. "Sirius, why are you fighting with me? We're friends!" she cried. "I'm just trying to talk to you –"

"_No_" he objected; his voice was dangerously quiet now. "You're _telling_ me to get over something you know nothing about."

"Sirius, I'm sorry if I offended –" she began to say, but Sirius turned on his heel, as Severus had before him, and stormed out of the classroom.

Amaryllis was taken aback by the entire exchange. After a long time, she sat down at her desk and closed her eyes, sinking back in to her chair as she thought about what Sirius said. '_You're telling me to get over something you know nothing about'_. It was true, Amaryllis could admit, that she had known only of what she had read in the papers. She silently scolded herself, she knew better than to tell Sirius to move past what he was feeling, that never helped. What did help though, was talking. Her friend Maddison was a trained psychologist and she wondered if she could convince Sirius to see her, or anyone for that matter, but hopefully Maddison as was aware of the wizarding world. Amaryllis took out a piece of parchment and her quill and began to write.

Isabella

Isabella needed to speak to Dumbledore as soon as possible, the meeting at her home would be in two days and she still had no idea how to convince her parents to let her attend. She thought about speaking to Hermione when nobody was looking but she didn't know when she could get the chance. Suddenly she had an idea. _Detention_. Detention would be a way for her to deliver her message to Dumbledore. Of course, Dumbledore did not hand out detentions, nor would any student be sent to him for it, but there were four Professors at Hogwarts that were members of the Order of the Phoenix that she could talk to. As Isabella walked into the Great Hall, she thanked her lucky stars when she saw Sirius, Harry and Hermione already talking near Gryffindor table – close by to them was Vincent Crabbe and Pansy Parkinson. Taking advantage of the opportunity, she pushed herself into Hermione.

"Watch it, _Mudblood_" she snapped loudly. Hermione looked at her with wide eyes while Harry gaped at her. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Crabbe and Pansy watching her. She ignored the others and caught Sirius's eye, and hoped he would understand her intentions.

"Miss Parish, that is one week's detention. Report to my office at 7pm" he ordered.

"_Whatever_" Isabella bit back and she turned on her heel and walked towards Crabbe and Pansy. She rolled her eyes at them and Crabbe smirked. Once she was out of their sight, she took a deep breath. Detention couldn't come soon enough.

Sirius 

"I'm guessing she wants to get a message across to you" said Sirius. He had gone straight to Dumbledore and spoke to him. "I have to give it to her…she must have been pretty desperate to _want _a detention."

….

It was almost 7pm and Sirius waited in his office for Isabella. Right on time, Isabella knocked on his door.

"Oh God, finally" she said breathlessly as she closed the door behind her. She collapsed on a chair across from Sirius. "My parents are going to be hosting a meeting – Bellatrix will be there."

"When?" he demanded.

"Wednesday night!" cried Isabella. "I tried to ask my mother to attend but she's refusing – I don't know what to do now!" She sobbed in her hands.

Sirius walked around his desk and crouched down in front of her, so he was at her level. "Isabella, I will go to Professor Dumbledore now and we will figure it out" he said soothingly. "Just remember that you're not alone". Isabella smiled weakly at him.

"You can't go now, I'm supposed to be in detention" she joked, wiping her nose with her sleeve. "What if someone sees me or you leave?"

Sirius sighed and stood up. "Well, you can do some homework" he said, sitting back in to chair.

"I've already done it – I have!" insisted Isabella, when Sirius gave her a doubtful look. "There's nothing to do here and I'm not allowed to talk to anyone in Gryffindor."

"Isabella, what made you feel differently from your family?" Sirius asked curiously.

"I don't know. I always knew there was something wrong with them" she replied thoughtfully. "And I've felt so…stuck and now I feel like I'm actually doing something."

Severus 

Severus, Minerva, Sirius and Amaryllis had gathered in Dumbledore's office to discuss what action they were to take in response to what Isabella had told Sirius.

"What should we do, Albus?" asked Minerva worriedly.

"I think we should alert the Ministry" Dumbledore concluded. Everybody looked at him in shock. He stood up from his desk. "We cannot afford to miss this opportunity. The main threat is Bellatrix Lestrange, but there are still many out there and if they are all to be meeting at the Parish residence then we must be prepared."

"What if it doesn't go according to plan?" Sirius asked. "And Isabella's family finds out that she told us."

"I doubt they will suspect her, Sirius" replied Dumbledore. "They will probably think there is a traitor amongst themselves. And on the chance that they do find out, she is safe at Hogwarts."

"Yeah, until she graduates" scoffed Sirius.

"Albus is right" said Severus. "Isabella Parish is safe here". Truthfully, Severus wasn't entirely certain of Dumbledore's plan, but he knew that if things went successfully, Bellatrix would be in Azkaban, and Isabella would be free, as he was.

"Are you sure we should leave this to the Ministry?" Sirius asked. "I think we could take them." He puffed his chest. Severus rolled his eyes.

"Didn't you _die_, Sirius?" asked Amaryllis humorously. "The last time you saw Bellatrix?" Severus snorted. Sirius narrowed his eyes at her, before he let out a bark of laughter.

"Shut up, Milly" he replied. "I don't recall you going up against any Death Eaters". They grinned at each other.

"Yes Sirius" Dumbledore answered with certainty. "I myself will speak to Kingsley tonight."

Amaryllis 

Hoping to catch Sirius in a better mood, Amaryllis waited for him outside Albus's office.

"A lot going on, huh?" she said when Sirius walked out. "Tea at mine?"

"Sure."

Amaryllis made tea, while Sirius sat on the carpet and patted Momo. She brought two tea cups over to him and sat on the carpet as well.

"Thanks" he said. He took a sip of his tea and coughed.

"Everything Ok?" Amaryllis asked.

"Yeah, fine" Sirius answered. He put his tea cup down and looked at her sheepishly. "Milly, I just wanted to apologise…for this morning. I shouldn't have blown up the way I did." Momo rested his chin on Sirius's lap.

"But you were right" said Amaryllis, and she put her hand of Sirius's. "It's true. I don't know what you've gone through. And it was wrong of me to tell you to get over your feelings about Severus." She gave Sirius's hand a small squeeze, which he returned. "I was thinking actually" she began carefully. "That, maybe you would benefit in talking to someone about it."

"What do you mean?" asked Sirius in confusion "Talk to who?"

"A psychologist" Amaryllis answered. "Someone you could talk to – kind of like a healer, but for your head" she explained.

"Like a shrink?" Sirius asked. Amaryllis raised her eyebrows at him. "I saw it when I watched the telestation once" he muttered.

She bit back a laugh at his pronunciation of 'television' but nodded, "Yeah, a shrink" she confirmed.

"Come on, Milly, I don't need to do that" said Sirius sceptically. He laid down on the carpet. "I have my friends to talk to."

"I know you do, but it's also beneficial to talk to someone who has an objective view of your life – Just think about it at least."

"Ok Mills" said Sirius. "But no promises."


	7. Chapter 7

Amaryllis 

It was early in the morning and Amaryllis left her quarters hoping to see Albus before breakfast. Realising it was Severus's birthday soon, she wanted to plan something for him. As she walked along the corridor, she saw Hermione and waved at her, before walking up to greet her.

"You're up quite early" Amaryllis said, smiling at young witch.

"I was hoping to go to the library before breakfast" said Hermione. "Is everything going alright?" she added quietly. "I saw Isabella had a detention with Siri – uh Professor Black".

Amaryllis hesitated. "Isabella said that there would be a meeting with Bellatrix at her house. Professor Dumbledore has decided to inform Kingsley and the Ministry about it, so they can ambush them."

Hermione frowned at that. "How are we even sure we can trust the Ministry with it?" she asked. "They haven't exactly been helpful in the past."

"Sirius said that as well" said Amaryllis. She heard voices and saw two students walking in their direction. "Anyway, that's as much as I know."

"Thanks Professor" said Hermione. She gave Amaryllis a small smile before walking away in the opposite direction, and Amaryllis had a feeling that the young witch would make a detour back to the Gryffindor common room before she went to the library.

Albus smiled at Amaryllis as she entered his office. "Good morning Amaryllis" he said and waved his hand forward as a gesture for her to take a seat.

"Morning Albus." She opened her mouth again to speak but hesitated, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. "I know we have a lot going on right now" she said slowly. "But it's Severus's birthday in a couple of days and I was wondering if I – _we_ – could do something for it." Her cheeks grew hot.

"Of course!" said Albus, putting his hands together in delight. "That is a wonderful idea, Amaryllis. Very thoughtful of you."

"I was thinking maybe something with the Order – a small gathering?" proposed Amaryllis. "I'm sure he'd enjoy it – especially if Lily was there" she added lamely.

"I think he would." He gave her a knowing look.

"Great!" She quickly stood up, cutting herself off from Albus's gaze. "I'll organise it – I mean, obviously we'll see how tonight goes. I was thinking of making it a surprise because I doubt Severus would go if I told him about it. Could you please tell him we're having a meeting on that night?"

"Of course, Amaryllis" promised Albus. His blue eyes twinkled.

Severus 

Finally the day of the Death Eater meeting had arrived, and Severus was feeling apprehensive. Dumbledore hadn't said anything more about the planned ambush which made him question if it would happen at all. He reached the Great Hall just in time for breakfast and noticed Amaryllis was missing from the table.

"Have you seen Milly this morning, Snape?" asked Sirius. Severus gave him a blank look and turned back to the food in front of him. He heard Sirius grumble something incomprehensible but chose to ignore him.

Minerva stood up to leave from the table and stopped to stand in between Severus and Sirius, "Albus would like to see you two after breakfast" she said in a quiet voice, and then she was gone. Severus ate his breakfast at a steady pace while Sirius scoffed it down and left the table quickly. He rolled his eyes, Sirius knew nothing about tact. He decided to leave the table later so it looked less suspicious. When his breakfast finished, he stood up, pushed in his chair, and made his way to Dumbledore's office. Entering the office, he saw Sirius and Amaryllis, he nodded at Amaryllis before addressing Dumbledore.

"What is it, Albus?" he asked directly.

"You, Sirius and I will ambush the meeting tonight" said Dumbledore. "Amaryllis will be at Grimmauld Place, ready, in case we get into trouble. Be ready at 6pm."

Sirius 

Sirius could not think of a time where he felt more ready for a battle than right now. He would be facing Bellatrix, and he would be doing it alongside James and Remus. Going in to the ambush from with them was Lily, Tonks and Kingsley, as well as the Aurors of the Ministry. Sirius felt prepared, this was it.

"You ready, Padfoot?" asked James, clapping him in the back.

"Definitely" said Sirius. "You?"

"Absolutely."

Sirius pulled James in to a fierce embrace. Once he let go of James, Amaryllis approached him.

"If you die tonight, I'm going to be really angry" she joked. He laughed before she engulfed him in a hug that left him struggling for air.

"Bloody Hell, Milly, I didn't know you had that much strength" said Sirius, coughing when she had let go of him. She went to Snape next.

"Don't die" she said seriously, then she hugged him as well.

Sirius bit back a laugh at Snape's expression of both surprise and awkwardness. Tonks coughed dramatically before Amaryllis pulled away, glaring at her.

"We go straight for Bellatrix" confirmed Dumbledore. Everybody nodded their understanding. Sirius waited until Dumbledore apparated and then followed suit.

Isabella's home was chaos. Sirius looked for Bellatrix but couldn't see her, he watched as many witches and wizards apparated out of the home. "WHERE IS SHE?" he bellowed. In the distance, he saw Lily duelling with a wizard he did not recognise. He turned then and saw a bright red light hit Tonks square in the chest, she collapsed. He ran to her side before turning to the person who hit her. Bellatrix.

"I'm right here, _cousin_" she sang in a sickly sweet voice that made Sirius grit his teeth. "Come for round two?"

"_DEPRIMO_" he roared. Bellatrix countered the spell with a wave of her wand.

"_Everte Statum_" shouted Rodolphus Lestrange, coming to Bellatrix's side. Sirius felt himself thrown backwards. With all of his force, he tried to stand up, but Rodolphus hit him with another curse. "_CRUCIO_" Sirius felt intense agony, his back arched in pain.

"_Finite Incantatem!_" he heard Snape shout and Rodolphus's curse ceased. Snape pointed his wand at Rodolphus. _Glacius tria." _ Rodolphus turned in to ice. Bellatrix screamed in anger.

"TRAITOR" Bellatrix screamed viciously at Snape. She raised her wand, but Snape was quicker than her.

"_Impedimenta!_" yelled Snape, knocking her backwards. Members of the Order circled her.

"_Incarcerous!_" Lily screamed. Rope wrapped around Bellatrix, but she waved her wand and it came undone.

"_Colloshoo!_" Remus shouted next, as soles of her shoes stuck to the ground with ectoplasm.

"_Expelliarmus!" _James shouted, and Bellatrix's wand came flying out of her hand. Sirius's heart was beating a mile a minute, they were so close.

Dumbledore wordlessly waved his wand and Bellatrix froze and fell to the ground.

It was over. Finally. They had got her.

Severus 

On Kingsley's instruction, the Aurors took Bellatrix and Rodolphus into custody, and Isabella's parents Wes and Calista.

Severus apparated back to Grimmauld Place. The first thing he saw was Amaryllis on the floor next to an unconscious Nymphadora. Lupin sat on his wife's other side, worry etched all over his face. Severus watched the white light from Amaryllis's hands become a shield over Nymphadora's chest. Moments passed and finally her eyes fluttered open.

"Did we win?" she asked groggily, turning her head to Lupin.

"Yes" he choked, and then he smiled warmly at her.

Amaryllis noticed Severus and gave him a small smile. She moved to Sirius then and put her hands on him.

"I've done about as much as I can" she said after a few minutes. "He's going to need to take healing potion as well." She looked at Severus, he nodded.

She went to him then and hugged him straight away. "Are you OK?" she asked, when she let go of him.

"I'm fine" said Severus awkwardly.

Amaryllis laughed. "Severus, it's just a hug" she said. "So what happened to Bellatrix?"

"She has been arrested," replied Severus, he leaned his back on the wall. "As well as her husband and Isabella's parents."

"Oh." She looked at him, confused. "I thought she was, you know...with Voldemort?" Severus said nothing. "What do you think will happen to Isabella now?"

"She'll be protected at Hogwarts." He opened his mouth to say more but Molly interrupted him, demanding everybody stay for tea. "I have to go back to Hogwarts" he said quickly.

"And just when Molly's getting everyone to socialise" joked Amaryllis. Severus narrowed his eyes at her. He bid his farewell to Molly and apparated back to Hogwarts.

Amaryllis 

"Hi Molly, did you want me to do anything?" asked Amaryllis, walking in to the kitchen. "I could make tea?"

"Oh no, dear" said Molly quickly. "I can manage." Amaryllis sat down on a stool and rested her head on the kitchen counter. "I see you've become very good friends with Severus" the older witch remarked nonchalantly.

Amaryllis snorted. "I don't about _good friends_" she said truthfully. "I mean, we talk but it's mostly work, or Order related."

"It's still more than most people here" said Molly, a small smile forming on her lips.

"I guess so. She stretched her back. "I should get going too. I'll just go and see Sirius before I leave – Oh! Is everything still Ok for tomorrow night? The birthday, I mean."

"Yes yes" Molly assured her. "And I'll make the cake as well."

"Oh shoot!" exclaimed Amaryllis. "I completely forgot about the cake!" She walked over to Molly and hugged her and wished her goodnight. She then went to Sirius's room and smiled when she saw him resting. "Where's James?" she asked, sitting on the end of the bed.

"I told him to stop fussing over me" replied Sirius. "Thanks for tonight."

"I'll send you the bill tomorrow."

He laughed loudly, before wincing in pain. "Damn Rodolphus" he said darkly. "I hope he enjoys Azkaban."


	8. Chapter 8

Amaryllis 

"Happy Birthday!" exclaimed Amaryllis, when Severus opened the door to his quarters. She ignored his stone expression and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Oh, at least try to look happy today." She thrusted a bouquet of balloons at him which she had spent all morning blowing up and writing his name on.

"You did not need to do all this" said Severus. He held the balloons at a distance as if they were a bomb.

Amaryllis rolled her eyes at him. "Honestly, when are you going to loosen up, huh?" she joked. "What are your plans for today?"

"Breakfast, class, lunch, class, dinner, sleep."

"Severus, you're only 39 years old and you sound as if you're an elderly old man, heck – I'm sure even Albus probably has more fun than you!" She ignored his glare. "Anyway, I should get going. I'll probably miss breakfast, but I'll see you at lunch."

Amaryllis went Sirius's quarters next, upon learning that, against all advice that he should rest, he had returned to Hogwarts in the early morning. She knocked on his door. It opened but Sirius was nowhere in sight. She walked in cautiously, and quickly found him sprawled on the carpet in the middle of his lounge room.

"You know, I could have been a Death Eater for all you know" reprimanded Amaryllis. She noticed he was wearing the same clothes she had seen him in the night before. "Have you even bathed since last night?"

"Milly, I used to roam the streets as a _mutt_" he scoffed.

"Yeah, well you don't anymore - why are you back here anyway? You should be resting."

"I've rested enough, thanks _Amarylliss_" said Sirius, drawing out her name. He looked slyly at her. "Besides, I think the real question is what's going on with and _Snape_?"

Amaryllis felt her cheeks grow hot as they had done when she saw Albus. "Nothing" she snapped. Sirius raised his eyebrows her. She blushed. "Sorry, I went to bed really late last night and I had to get up early this morning."

"Maybe _you_ should be the one seeing the shrink" joked Sirius.

"Siri –" began Amaryllis, but Sirius interjected before she could finish her sentence.

"I'll see Maddison" he said. "I spoke to Remus about it last night and he thinks it's a good idea." Amaryllis felt elated. She ran to Sirius and hugged him tightly,. "Again with the strength, Milly" he laughed, while simultaneously wincing.

….

Classes went by fast and already it was lunch time. Amaryllis gathered the assessment papers she had just received from her students and began reading. She heard a knock and looked up to find Sirius.

"Not coming to lunch?" he asked. He pulled out a chair from under one of the student desks and took a seat.

"I have papers that need to be marked by tomorrow" sighed Amaryllis. "And with the birthday later on, I won't have any time aside from now. Why aren't you at lunch?"

"I'm about to go now." He leant back on the chair, tilting it so it was on two legs. "Still got it" he smirked. But then the chair wobbled, and took Sirius to the ground with it as it fell backwards. Amaryllis burst out laughing. "Shut up, Milly" he muttered. He picked up the chair and pushed it back in to the desk roughly. "I'm going to lunch. Make sure you eat something."

….

It was late afternoon and Amaryllis had finally finished her work. She was starving so she decided to go to the kitchens to get something to eat and take it back to her quarters. Greeted by at least a dozen house elves, she smiled as one of the smaller elves ran up to her and bowed.

"What can Dewey do for Professor Swan?" said the small elf.

"Have you got any soup, Dewey?"

"Of course, ma'am! Pumpkin or chicken and corn?"

"Hmm, pumpkin!" Amaryllis chose happily. Dewey disappeared and quickly returned with a steaming hot bowl of soup. "Thank you very much, Dewey" she said. The small elf bowed and disappeared again.

When she walked carefully back to her quarters, Amaryllis saw Severus nearing her from the opposite direction; as she got closed to him, Peeves flew past her and knocked her forward, and her soup spilt on Severus. She opened her mouth to apologise but Severus spoke first.

"_You fool_" he snapped.

Amaryllis blinked, taken aback. She watched as he held forward a dark green book, inspecting it closely. They both saw that the soup had drenched the pages.

"Severus, I'm sorry, I can dry –" Amaryllis began to say, but he cut across her.

"Your _stupidity_ has no bounds" he sneered, still inspecting the book. Amaryllis felt her eyes sting and left before she embarrassed herself by crying in front of him. She walked to her quarters briskly.

Once inside, Amaryllis's tears began to flow. She felt hurt and humiliated at Severus's reaction, and even worse she felt stupid thinking that they had finally become friends. She walked in to the bathroom and splashed water on to her face, grabbing her bottle of makeup remover and pouring the contents of it in to her hand before smearing it roughly on to her face. The makeup she had on her face mixed together, and when she looked at the mirror she almost laughed at her reflection. She splashed water on to her face again until all the residue of her makeup had disappeared and wiped her face with a towel.

When she heard a knock on her door, she was relieved to find Sirius. Amaryllis said nothing to him in greeting but opened her door wider so he could enter.

"And hello to you too" he said slowly. "You OK?"

"Nothing Sirius" she replied. But then her voice cracked and she began to cry again, she put her hands over her face.

Sirius, alarmed, rushed to her quickly. "Milly, why – what happened?!" he asked, and tried to pull her hands so he could see her face.

"Nothing." She felt stupid. "I'm just being a baby."

"Amaryllis, what happened?" Sirius repeated, though sternly this time.

"I don't know...Peeves bumped in to me and I dropped soup on Severus's book and he got really mad at me."

"I'm sorry to hear he treated you that way, Milly. You didn't deserve it" Sirius said sincerely. "But I'm not surprised at Snape's behaviour –"

"Just say 'I told you so" and be done with it," Amaryllis interjected angrily. Sirius took a step back from her and shook his head.

"I'm not here to say that" he said, grimacing. and then he paused. "Are you still planning on the party?"

"I don't know," replied Amaryllis. Her tears had stopped thankfully. "I'm sure Lily and Molly would still like to go ahead with it. They can do it, I just won't be there."

"Then I won't either" said Sirius at once.

Amaryllis laughed weakly. "It's at _your_ house, you have to go."

"And _you're_ the one who organised this whole thing."

"You have to go" said Amaryllis softly. "If not for anything else, at least you'll get to see James and Remus."

Sirius huffed. "Fine. But what am I supposed to say when they ask about you?"

"Just tell them I'm sick."

Severus 

Severus finished drying his diary with his wand. He inspected the front and back cover and then flipped the pages inside to make sure all residue of the soup Amaryllis has spilled on it had disappeared. He knew he had overreacted but at that moment, he was far more concerned about the diary that Lily had gifted him. He carefully placed the diary inside his desk and began to get ready for the Order meeting. Annoyed initially at having to attend, he was happy at the prospect of seeing Lily again.

Severus apparated to Grimmauld Place and was greeted with darkness. He immediately whipped out his, cautiously entering the dining room.

"SURPRISE!" came a dozen voices and suddenly the entire room lit up revealing many members of the Order. Severus felt overwhelmed as they wished him Happy Birthday one by one. He was embraced by Lily and Molly and was approached by James, Lupin, Arthur and Kingsley, who all shook his hand. From across the table, he glared at Dumbledore, who in turn merely raised his goblet to him. Severus noted that the only person who hadn't wished him was Sirius. Molly grabbed his arm and led him over to sit at the end of the table, opposite to Dumbledore, then she and everybody else took their seats. Lily remained standing, and she tapped her goblet with a spoon and cleared her throat.

"I just want to make a toast to Severus Snape, my best friend and one of the bravest people I know." She raised her goblet, and everybody followed.

"Here here!" they all chorused, and clanked goblets with each other.

"Speech, speech, speech" Fred and George both chanted. Everybody looked at Severus expectedly, and he internally groaned.

"This was all very unnecessary" he said. The whole room burst in to laughter.

"Hey, don't blame us" said Nymphadora, raising her hands in defence,. "Milly was the one who planned it – Where is she anyway?" she asked, looking around the room.

"She's sick" said Sirius, finally speaking.

"That's a shame" said Lily sadly. "She was really excited for it."

"I'll say" said Sirius. "She didn't even eat until this afternoon, but I guess _soup_ is the best thing to have when you're sick."

Guilt washed over Severus. If he had thought that Amaryllis wasn't affected by his behaviour, then he was dead wrong. He thought back to the afternoon and remembered her hurt expression. Details that he hadn't realised then, that were all flooding back to him now. He felt touched that Amaryllis had organised the party for him; he remembered the balloons that she had given to him early in the morning, they had his name on them.

"Is everything Ok, Sev?" asked Lily.

"Yes."

...

It was past 10pm when Severus apparated back to Hogwarts. He decided that he would go to Amaryllis's quarters to apologise to her before retiring for the night.

"Yes?" said Amaryllis coldly, when she opened the door.

For a brief moment Severus said nothing, too taken aback by this new tone of hers that he didn't think she was capable of.

"I wanted to apologise" he said. "For my behaviour this afternoon."

"You should be sorry." And then she closed the door without another word.


	9. Chapter 9

**_Hey guys, sorry for the re-upload. I just went through and fixed some grammatical errors I had noticed!_**

**_..._**

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis looked in the mirror and straightened out her dress, she would be attending her Muggle friend Elissa's wedding later in the day. She quickly grabbed her purse and ushered Momo out the door. Hagrid had more than happily agreed to look after him while she was out, as Momo and Fang had become good friends.

"Hi Hagrid" she said, as she walked in to the warm hut. She smiled when Momo ran to Fang and licked him in greeting. "Thanks for taking Momo today."

"It's fine, Fang loves havin' him 'ere!" Hagrid replied, chuckling. "Yeh should keep an eye on him though. He was runnin' towards the Whompin' Willow – if Severus Snape hadn't gotten teh him in time…"

"Momo!" Amaryllis exclaimed. He quickly hid behind Hagrid and whimpered. "Thanks for letting me know, Hagrid."

Amaryllis had invited Sirius to the wedding as her guest and they would be meeting in front of Albus's office to apparate to the botanical gardens where the ceremony would be held. As she neared the office, she saw Minerva talking to Severus and immediately felt her stomach drop; she hadn't spoken to Severus in almost a week.

"Amaryllis, you look very nice" Minerva noted, when Amaryllis approached them. "Where are you off to?"

"A friend's wedding" Amaryllis replied, blushing at the compliment. She didn't look at Severus. "I'm just waiting for Sirius, he's coming with me." As she spoke, a group of loud students ran past them casting paper planes through the windows of the classes down the corridor. Muttering as she rushed to catch them, Minerva left Amaryllis alone to stand with Severus.

She looked at her shoes at once. Deeply, she was thankful that he had saved Momo from getting hurt, but she still felt wounded from his behaviour.

Finally, Amaryllis looked up. "Hagrid told me about Momo. Thank you, Severus." She could still hear in her voice some reservation and she didn't smile at him. He nodded his head at her once before turning on his heel and leaving in the same direction as Minerva.

Amaryllis watched him depart with a small pit of guilt in her stomach. She knew it was unfounded, and yet it existed; it was not in her nature to speak to people impolitely or hold grudges.

Thankfully she saw Sirius jogging towards her then and she quickly buried her thoughts. "Sorry, I'm late" he said breathlessly. Two Ravenclaw students giggled as they walked past them. From what she had overheard in her classes, _many _of the female students at Hogwarts had developed a crush on him. She snorted. Sirius gave her a quizzical look in response, but she shook her head in dismissal. Together they apparated and arrived at the botanical gardens; the wedding party were still setting up.

"_Milly!_" Amaryllis turned to the voice and saw a small blonde-haired woman running towards her and Sirius.

"Hey Ruby!" said Amaryllis cheerfully and engulfed her friend in a tight embrace.

"I feel like I haven't seen you in ages!" cried Ruby, once they had let go of each other. She quickly looked at Sirius and then back to Amaryllis expectedly. "Is this your boyfriend?"

Amaryllis laughed. "No, this is my friend Sirius, we work together" she replied. Ruby eyed him with more interest. "Where's Elissa?"

"In the bridal tent" replied Ruby, though her eyes didn't leave Sirius. Amaryllis left them and entered the bridal tent.

"_Lissie!_" she squealed excitedly.

The brunette, who was getting her makeup done, turned around quickly. "Milly!" she cried, and took a step towards Amaryllis, but almost tripped on the train of her white gown. Amaryllis instead walked to her, carefully, so she wouldn't step on the dress, and engulfed Elissa in a hug that lasted for at least a whole minute.

"You look so beautiful" she gushed, once she let go of her friend. "I honestly can't believe you're getting married! I feel like only yesterday we were at your 21st birthday and I was cleaning vomit out of your hair."

"Oh God, that was a wild night!" Elissa laughed.

Amaryllis left Elissa to finish getting ready and looked for Sirius. She saw a group of women crowded in a circle and rolled her eyes when she saw he was the main attraction. She broke into the circle and grabbed him by the arm to be seated with her for the ceremony, ignoring every glare she got.

"Can you behave?" she hissed.

"What?" Sirius hissed back, "_I didn't even do anything!_"

Amaryllis shushed him and turned her attention to the groom, Jacob, who took his place at the altar. Elissa walked down the aisle and said, or more fittingly _cried_, her vows. Amaryllis turned to Sirius and gave him a teary smile when they were finally pronounced as married.

After the ceremony, everybody left their seats to eat, drink and dance. Amaryllis laughed out loud when a slightly intoxicated Ruby pulled Sirius on to the dance floor. She was sitting by herself when Elissa came and took a seat in the empty chair beside her.

"You know, you may just lose your boyfriend tonight" she said, jerking her head towards the dancing couple.

"Sirius isn't my boyfriend" sighed Amaryllis. "We work together."

"_Of course you are_" said Elissa, rolling her eyes. She sat back further on her chair. "You know, every guy who's ever asked me about you always think I'm lying when I tell them you've never had a boyfriend".

Amaryllis narrowed her eyes at her. "Nobody asks about me."

Elissa snorted in defiance. "Don't act ignorant. How many times have you said no when I've tried to set you up with someone. Hell, Brodie may just break the _Guinness World Book of Records_ for 'how many times someone's asked someone out and they've said no'."

"I don't want anyone."

"Sure."

"Just because you're married now doesn't mean you're some relationship guru, you know" scoffed Amaryllis. She sighed again, but irritably this time, when Elissa made no other response. "I _thought_ I made a _friend_ at least" she said finally. "But it's never going to work out now."

"And why is that?"

"He has a short temper that I won't tolerate" said Amaryllis at once.

"And you shouldn't" agreed Elissa. "Did you tell him off?"

"I did, and then I stopped talking to him for a week."

"Would you be willing to let him grow?" reasoned Elissa.

"He shouldn't need to, _not at his age_" scoffed Amaryllis.

"You say that as if you're perfect."

Amaryllis put her nose in the air in mock seriousness. "I am, thank you" she said loftily. Elissa rolled her eyes but laughed heartily, before Jacob pulled her back on to the dancefloor.

Isabella

Isabella left Dumbledore's office feeling lighter than she had felt in years. She had informed him that she had written to her parents about her involvement in the ambush at her house. She didn't care about the consequences. Bellatrix Lestrange was in Azkaban now, and she was away from her parents. Isabella was finally free.

"_Traitor!_"

She casually turned around and saw Pansy Parkinson and a small group of Slytherin students walking towards her; they looked mutinous.

"Yes?"

"_Blood traitor!_" screeched Pansy. "Dumbledore's _dog!_"

"I'm a traitor?" said Isabella lowly. "Look at _you._ You're all supposedly opposed to Dumbledore and yet you're all here, _with_ Dumbledore. All of you are _cowards_, too scared to go out in to the real world so you're sheltering yourselves here at Hogwarts. I may be a traitor but at least I've chosen a side!". A crowd of students had formed around them, watching the exchange with keen interest.

Pansy glared at her. Isabella shrugged and turned around to walk away but she was knocked in to the corridor wall. She regained her composure quickly and looked at Pansy who was smirking in accomplishment. Isabella waved her wand and her opponent turned in to a large green slug. Raising her wand again, she looked at the rest of the Slytherin group, challenging them to take the next move.

"Miss Parish!" came McGonagall's scolding voice. She broke through the crowd. "You do_ not_ use magic on other students at Hogwarts! That will be 50 points from Gryffindor and Slytherin and detention tonight for you and Miss Parkinson" McGonagall said sternly, though Isabella noted that her Head of House did not look entirely upset. Isabella turned to leave and saw Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Anna all looking at her with awe. She walked up to them, smirking.

"I've been wanting to do that to Parkinson since I got here."

Harry, Ron and Ginny burst out laughing.

"You're _definitely_ a Gryffindor" said Ron.

Isabella grinned. "Damn right – Want to go get lunch? I'm starving." Everybody nodded their approval and they headed to the Great Hall, together.

Severus 

There was loud laughter coming from the next corridor. Severus silently groaned at the thought of having to deal with out-of-bed students when he was about to retire for the night. When he turned the corner and saw the culprits, he realised they were not students at all. Sirius Amaryllis walked together, _closely_, smiling and laughing. A familiar wave of jealously hit him all at once, and he couldn't decipher whether it was because Sirius was that close to Amaryllis as friends, or romantically.

He allowed himself to look at her, and she held his eyes whole, effortlessly beautiful in her Muggle dress. His lip curled in bitterness when he remembered that she wasn't talking to him anymore.

Sirius and Amaryllis must have noticed his presence because their laughter had ceased. Then Sirius, whom Severus had expected was overjoyed at the prospect of Amaryllis no longer speaking to him, leisurely slung an arm over her shoulder. They eyed each other, like two territorial dogs, though Severus was sure that neither he nor Sirius knew why. Severus was the first to look away, more confused than defeated. He left them without saying a word.

"_Severus!_"

He stopped in his place but did not turn around to face her. He heard her shoes as they briskly walked to him; only one pair, she must have left Sirius behind.

And when he blinked, Amaryllis was in his vision again.

"So I've been thinking" she said, and she wrung her hands together nervously. "That I would really still like to be friends." Severus was sure his pupils dilated slightly, but other than that he did not react. She continued. "But I'm still mad at how you spoke to me. It's unacceptable."

Severus, who had not apologised, _not really_, to anybody since he apologised to Lily so long ago, was stumped. His pride itched and he could not tolerate hearing Amaryllis reprimand him for behaviour he had not changed for anyone in over twenty years, especially not when she didn't matter to him _as much_ as Lily did. But, she was _giving_ Severus a second chance and he knew that if he did not take it now, he would lose it forever.

"I understand" Severus said finally. And with every ounce of strength he could muster, he buried his pride and uttered the next words: "I am sorry, truly." And he was.

Amaryllis considered him closely, as if searching for a lie, or a façade, but then her face broke gently into a smile, the familiar one that Severus hadn't realised he got used to, and he knew their friendship was whole again.

"Good" was all she said.

They walked together to their quarters, theirs being so close to each other, and Severus noticed after some time that Amaryllis was struggling to match his long strides and so he slowed down. It only gave him more time to think unfortunately, and he realised, with both intense embarrassment and exhilaration, that he would be 'walking her to her door'.

Nothing happened, of course.

"Oh!" she exclaimed, right before she went inside. "I probably won't be at lunch every Tuesday for the next few weeks. I'm gong to hold revision classes."

Severus scoffed. "You're wasting your time" he said snidely. "They shouldn't need revision classes if they actually pay attention."

"Just because they're finding it difficult doesn't mean that they're not trying" said Amaryllis gently. "Some students take a little longer than others to get something, and I don't believe in punishing them for that. Instead, I want to help them so they can succeed too."

Amaryllis Swan's kindness was the quality of hers that impressed Severus the most. She had many good qualities, he admitted, and he indulgently kept her in his thoughts until slumber took them away from him.


	10. Chapter 10

Isabella 

"Finally, something to look forward to" said Isabella happily, as she ate breakfast at the Gryffindor table. "The Valentine's Day Ball is just what we need right now, it'll be fun!"

"Yeah, _heaps on fun_" groaned Ron, slumping in his seat.

"Well I totally agree with Bella" Ginny approved, shooting Isabella a smile. "Especially considering the mixed bag of a year we had last year." Everybody nodded in agreement.

"As long as I don't have to wear my old dress robes" complained Ron.

"I always thought they looked nice" said Hermione quietly. He gave her a small smile.

"Aww, you guys are cute" teased Isabella. They both glared at her, but she ignored them. She sighed dramatically. "Alone _again_ for Valentine's Day."

"You've never had a Valentine?" scoffed Ginny doubtfully.

"Nope" replied Isabella. "It was slim pickings, really. I had only to choose from pureblood_s _and wannabe Death Eaters."

Ginny shuddered. "Definitely slim pickings." She looked at Anna. "What about you?"

Anna blushed bright pink. "Uh, not really" she said softly. "At the orphanage we used to have a Secret Valentine's thing. Like Secret Santa."

"You lived in an orphanage?" Harry asked quietly.

"Yeah, all my life."

"What happened to your parents?" Hermione asked gently.

"I don't know" said Anna, and then she shrugged. "I don't know anything about them." She cleared her throat. "What are you guys doing after dinner?"

"Quidditch practice" sighed Harry, looking a Ron and Ginny. They both groaned.

Anna turned to Isabella and Hermione. "Want to go to the library?" Hermione nodded enthusiastically at her.

"As much as I would _love_ to, ladies" said Isabella sarcastically, as Harry, Ron and Ginny sniggered. "I have detention with McGonagall tonight. You know, _for Pansy_."

Sirius 

McGonagall had asked Sirius to supervise Isabella's detention for her, and to avoid confusion, had allowed for the detention to take place in her office. Sirius heard a knock on the door and waited for Isabella to enter. He smiled at her.

"Oh" said Isabella, seemingly confused upon seeing Sirius. "I'm actually supposed to be seeing Professor McGonagall for detention tonight – have you swapped offices?"

"I'm taking over for her tonight" he explained.

"So I guess it's not really going to be detention, huh?" She took the seat opposite of Sirius. He looked at her mock-offended.

"On the contrary, Miss Parish" Sirius replied. "You'll be writing 10,000 lines tonight saying 'I will not turn Pansy Parkinson in to a giant green slug'."

"It was worth it" Isabella laughed.

Sirius shook his head, amused, but then he remembered her circumstances. "How did your family take it when you told them?" he asked.

"Not good, _obviously"_ replied Isabella. "I'm sure they've disowned me too, but meh". She shrugged.

Sirius grimaced, having complete empathy to her situation – which was very similar to his own in his youth. "Well, you're out now" he said gently.

She was silent. "Yeah…I just hope they rot in Azkaban."

He raised his eyebrows. "You hate them that much?"

"And then some."

Sirius sat forward in his chair. "What happened to make you feel this way, Isabella?"

"It's nothing" said Isabella roughly. She opened her bag and took out piece of parchment and a quill. "So it's 10,000 lines?"

"What happened to you, Isabella?"

She looked at him, pained. "They didn't do anything to _me_" she whispered, and for a moment Sirius thought she was going to say more but she closed her mouth firmly and put the parchment on her desk.

"Isabella, please."

She looked at him again. "My parents, they're bad people" she said, her voice was barely above a whisper. "And they _killed _him." Her voice broke. "They killed my little brother because he was a Squib."

Sirius paled.

"He was only 8 years old" she continued. "And I was 12. I didn't know what was going on, or I would have run away with him. Everyone was always talking, people came over. And then it happened. My mother…I could tell she didn't want…I don't think she ever recovered…" Tears began to fall down her cheeks. "He could have done so many things…Gone to school, have friends, maybe he could have been good at football."

She put her face in her hands and Sirius left his seat and crouched down in front of her.

"What you've done, Isabella…You've been so brave. Your brother would be proud of you" he said gently. "What was your brother's name?"

Isabella smiled sadly. "Sam."

Isabella 

Isabella had felt lighter after talking to Sirius. The next morning, she told her friends.

"Isabella, I'm so sorry" said Hermione tearfully. They all sat in the Gryffindor common room. Harry, Ron and Ginny looked grim and Anna left her spot on an arm chair to sit next to Isabella on the carpet. Isabella rested her head on her shoulder.

"It still doesn't feel real" she whispered. "Nothing does."

"I get it" Harry comforted her. "We all do."

"So what now?" asked Isabella, as she pulled her head from Anna's shoulder. "We all just go back to our daily lives, like none of this happened?"

"Not at all" said Ron at once. "We remember everything that happened, and we believe what we've done…it's so nothing like this happens again. You should be proud of yourself, Bella. I know I am – we all are." He paused. "And so is Sam." Isabella felt a lump form in her throat, and suddenly she felt a rush of affection for Ron. Hermione looked at him admiringly.

"Yeah" agreed Ginny. "You've lost Sam, and your parents, but we…" She gestured to everyone. "We're your family now."

Isabella's vision was blurry from tears she had finally allowed to fall. She gripped her beaded necklace, the one that Sam had made for her, and felt peace, for the first time since his death.

Amaryllis 

"So you're looking forward to the Valentine's Day Ball, I'm sure" said Amaryllis sarcastically. Severus glared at her. They were sitting in his classroom marking papers after dinner; it had become a routine. "Any plans?"

"No" he replied, not looking up from his paper. "Yourself?"

"Of course" she answered at once. He looked up. "It's a yearly tradition that I spend with Momo, eating junk food and watching movies – It's a shame I can't watch TV here."

"I would have thought you would be busy."

"And what does that mean?" Amaryllis said defensively.

Severus must have picked up on her tone, because he said then: "You have…good attributes."

She blushed and looked away, and when she looked at him again, he had turned his attention to the paper in front of him again. Amaryllis looked at her paper as well and tried to stop the smile forming on her lips.


	11. Chapter 11

Harry 

Valentine's Day was fast approaching, and Hogwarts was decorated for the occasion. Harry, Ron and Ginny had just finished Quidditch practice and were waiting in the Great Hall for Hermione, Anna and Isabella.

"So apparently Seamus asked Anna to the Ball tomorrow night" said Ginny. She rested her back on Harry's chest. "Oh get over it, Ron" she added sharply, seeing her brother's expression of disgust.

"I'm still not used to this" he grumbled. And then his face changed. "Wait, did you say Seamus?"

"Yeah, why?"

"_Why?_ He's a git!"

"Agreed" said Harry. "Did she say yes?"

"Ask her yourself" said Ginny. Hermione, Anna and Isabella approached the table and took a seat.

"Oi Anna, are you going with Seamus to the Ball?" asked Ron bluntly.

She flushed bright pink. "Yes" she answered. "Why?"

"He's a git."

"Oh, he is not" objected Hermione. "Besides, it's not up to _you._ Anna likes him, so she's going with him."

"Well, I don't _like_ him" said Anna quickly. "We're friends."

"I agree with Ron" piped in Isabella. "He's a git."

Anna looked hurt.

"Maybe he's not _that_ bad" reasoned Harry, and he stood firmly on Ron's foot with the heel of his shoe.

"_What?_" yelped Ron. Harry jerked his head at Anna when she wasn't looking. "Oh – sorry Anna" said Ron, looking sheepish. "I was just overreacting."

At that same moment, Sirius walked in to the Great Hall and suddenly the room filled with loud whispers and giggling.

Ron snorted. "I bet there's a bunch of girls who wish they could ask Sirius to the Ball."

"Apparently somebody_ did_" whispered Ginny excitedly.

His head snapped in her direction. "No way!" he exclaimed. "What happened?!"

"Well obviously Sirius declined" replied Ginny, rolling her eyes. "And McGonagall apparently got up them."

"Who was it?" asked Harry.

"No idea" Ginny replied. "I heard it in the bathroom."

Ron slumped back in to his chair, seemingly disappointed.

"Who are you going with, Bells?" asked Ginny.

"Nobody" sighed Isabella, and she theatrically clutched her heart and pretended to feint. Hermione and Anna laughed.

"Oh, come on" said Ginny, rolling her eyes again. "As if no one's asked _you _out."

"Ok fine" said Isabella. "I've had a few people ask me, but I'm just not interested." Suddenly, she leaned in on the table. "Besides, I've been _way_ more interested in whatever's been going on with Snape and Swan."

Harry, who had just taken a sip of pumpkin juice, almost choked. "What?" he spluttered in between breaths.

"Don't tell me you guys haven't noticed?!" exclaimed Isabella. Nobody reacted. "There's definitely something going on!"

"Come off it" waved off Harry.

"Yeah" scoffed Ron. "That's as bad as Anna and Seamus." Harry stomped on his foot again. "Sorry – it's just that Swan is nice, and Snape is…"

"A hero?" offered Isabella, sarcastically.

"It's just weird" said Ron. "Snape with _anyone_ is weird." He looked as if he was about to say more but when his eyes met Harry's, quickly shut his mouth.

"Who knows" said Hermione briskly, and she stood up. "We should get to the library, and _you_ need to start on your Transfiguration paper" she finished, looking at Ron.

"Fine" he huffed.

"Coming Harry?" asked Hermione. She gave him a knowing look. "You haven't started on it either." He nodded quickly and hoped the others wouldn't ask to join them.

Once seated in the library, Hermione rounded on Harry. "Was that uncomfortable for you?" she asked. Ron looked sheepish.

"I don't know" replied Harry. "I guess, sort of."

"It's all come out of nowhere, right?" she said. "We never even considered Snape to be with anyone _ever,_ and suddenly we know about him and your Mum, and now him and Swan…"

"I'll say" muttered Ron. "But still – him and _Swan_?"

"It's not all about looks, Ronald" said Hermione crossly. She edged away from him.

"That's not what I mean, Mione" sighed Ron, shaking his head. "She's like the nicest professor here, and Snape, well, he's still a git."

"He's done so much though!" protested Hermione.

"But think of all the times he hurt your feelings" countered Ron. "He was Neville's _boggart_ for crying out loud!"

"It doesn't matter" said Harry quickly, before Hermione could respond. "Any of it. I _saw_ Snape's Pensieve, he's been in love with my Mum for almost all his life. I doubt he'll be getting over her any time soon."

Amaryllis 

It was after dinner and Amaryllis and Severus had gathered in his class room to mark papers. Amaryllis technically didn't have _any_ papers to mark, but she enjoyed Severus's company, even if it was in silence. From her seat across from him, she looked at him closely and she concluded after some time that she was completely attracted to him. But she couldn't understand why. He was certainly no Prince Charming by the stretch of any imagination, or even a gentleman by society's standards. No, Severus was a total enigma. A mixture of all four seasons all at the same time, unpredictable and unarming. And that terrified her.

Friendship would be best for them.

And safe for her.

But still her mind probed possibilities, and suddenly it sopped on the knowledge that tomorrow was the Valentine's Day Ball. She wondered if he had ever had a date…

Perhaps she must have become caught in some kind of trance, because the next few words that left Amaryllis Swan's lips did not get any approval from her brain: "Severus, would you like to go to the ball with me?"

Severus did not answer for at least ten seconds, though it felt much longer to her. Finally: "No." He did not say it unkindly but Amaryllis felt a wave of humiliation wash over her. She looked away from him and cleared her throat to ground herself.

"Yeah, of course…" said Amaryllis. "I don't know why I thought…just…forget I said anything." She stood up hastily. "I should probably get going…um, I'll see you tomorrow." And she all but ran out of the dungeons, back to her quarters.

Once she was inside, she burst out laughing. She didn't know why; it certainly wasn't funny.

Before dinner, she had asked Sirius to come to her quarters to help her choose a dress to wear to the Ball. When she heard the door knock, she rushed to answer it.

"No wonder everyone thinks we're together" he joked, when Amaryllis opened the door. "I must spend _at least_ five nights here a week."

"I've made a terrible mistake" she groaned.

"What did you do?" She opened the door wider, so he could enter.

"So you just…asked him to the Ball, like a date?" said Sirius from the kitchen; he had offered to make tea.

"No, just as friends" replied Amaryllis hastily. "It all happened so fast; I didn't even think of clarifying to him." She put her hands over her face. "I suppose I wasn't thinking at all."

Sirius brought two cups of tea in to her bedroom. He carefully put them on to the coffee table before flopping on to her bed.

"What about this one?" asked Amaryllis, and she showed him a navy-blue floor length gown. He scrunched his face and she tossed it on the chair next to her. She showed him four more dresses before finally picking up an emerald green gown.

"I like this" approved Sirius, sitting up.

I don't know…" said Amaryllis slowly. "I wore green to the Christmas party." Truthfully, she didn't want to wear green or anything else that would remind Severus of _Lily_.

"So?" said Sirius. "Who cares if you wear the same colour again? Besides, only a couple of us were at the Christmas party."

"I just want to wear another colour" she answered quickly. Sirius looked at her with a calculating expression for a moment, but then he shrugged, and laid down on the bed again.

"That's nice" he said, when Amaryllis showed him a black gown. It was floor length with a flowing skirt, high neck and no sleeves.

"Are you sure it's appropriate to wear without the sleeves?" she asked nervously.

"Definitely" said Sirius. "It's a Ball, you're supposed to wear _non-work_ attire".

"I do like it…" said Amaryllis. She held the gown against her body. "OK, this is the one." She hung it on her dresser, and then laid down next to Sirius. They were face to face. "What have I done?" she murmured. "I finally had my friendship back, and now I've blown it."

"Don't even worry about it" said Sirius gently. "Snape's daft anyway." She looked at him doubtfully. "OK, maybe he's not _that_ daft."

"So what do I do?"

"Live your life" he said simply. She laughed. "_Seriously_" he continued. "See friends, get to know new people…enjoy your days. Life is too short to spend it worrying over stupid _boys_." They laughed after that, even though nothing was funny anymore, and Amaryllis Swan felt a rush of affection for Sirius Black, far greater than she had already felt for him. He truly was a good friend.


	12. Chapter 12

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis sleepily pushed away Momo's face; it was far too early for him to be giving her his morning sniff. But when she looked at her watch on the night stand, her eyes widened in panic. She and Sirius, who had stayed the night on her sofa, had overslept. She jumped out of bed and quickly ran to the living room where he was sleeping. She shook him awake.

"W-what?" grumbled Sirius, blinking several times as he adjusted to the light.

"It's 8:30!" Amaryllis cried. "We're so late!" She ran to her bedroom and frantically started to pull clothes out of her wardrobe.

"We're not that late" said Sirius, from the living room. He didn't sound disturbed by their tardiness in the least. "Just put on some clothes and head down to breakfast."

"Yeah, that's easy for you to say" Amaryllis murmured to herself. "All you have to do is put on a different shirt." She quickly changed and ran into the bathroom to brush her teeth. She pulled her hair in to a messy ponytail, and moisturised her face, having no time to put on any makeup. She ran back in to living room where Sirius was still laying on the sofa.

"Sirius! You haven't even gotten up!" she exclaimed. "Breakfast is about to finish!"

"It's fine, Mills" he replied casually. "Let's just go to breakfast."

"You're not even going to change? Or brush your teeth?"

Sirius shook his head.

She sighed. "Fine, let's go".

Amaryllis walked speedily to breakfast, while Sirius walked at a slower pace. When they entered the Great Hall, she felt extremely self-conscious, that, with her and Sirius's dishevelled appearances, the students and staff would jump to conclusions. However, much to Amaryllis's relief, the students had barely even noticed the two of them enter.

But then she approached the staff table, and she immediately felt her stomach drop.

Severus.

In the rush of getting ready, Amaryllis had forgotten all about him and the events of the previous night. She suddenly became self-conscious again.

"Morning" she said briskly, when she took her seat next to him "How was your sleep?"

"Fine" replied Severus. "Yours?" he asked with a slight arch of his eyebrow.

Amaryllis almost kicked herself; of all the things she could have said to him, she just _had_ to ask how his sleep was.

"Fine" she answered and turned her attention quickly to the food in front of her; she was unsure how she was supposed to act around Severus now. Many of her friends who had been in this situation before had chosen to ignore or cut off their connection with the person, but Amaryllis thought that was an unfair and immature way of handling things. After all, it wasn't Severus's fault that he didn't want to go with her.

"Oh!"

Amaryllis jumped in surprise, having momentarily forgotten Sirius's presence next to her.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Milly" he said, and bowed in his seat.

Amaryllis laughed. "Happy Valentine's Day to you too" she said. She was glad her first smile on Valentine's Day had been to Sirius. Then she turned to Severus reluctantly. "Happy Valentine's Day" she said quietly. "Excited for the day?" she quickly added.

He didn't respond for a moment. "Not particularly" he replied, with his usual deadpanned expression.

Amaryllis had to laugh at that.

Classes had finished for the day and it was time to get ready for the Ball. Amaryllis decided to spend extra time doing her hair and makeup, and she was happy with the result. Her overall look was very romantic; simple makeup and her hair had been styled in to a low bun, with some loose curls framing her face. She heard a knock on her door and quickly ran out of her bedroom, knowing it would be Sirius. They had agreed to go to the Great Hall together. Amaryllis opened the door and laughed when she saw Sirius with a yellow rose.

"For you, madam" he said with a cockney accent. She took the rose, and lightly bumped his head with it.

"Shall we?" she asked, matching his accent. Sirius held out his arm for her to take and together they walked to the Ball. Amaryllis felt enchanted by the Great Hall as they walked in; it had been decorated in the most beautiful, ethereal way. Many of the students had arrived and were already dancing, and Amaryllis laughed out loud when she saw Seamus Finnigan dancing wildly next to Anna Lindsay, who was barely moving in comparison.

"You look lovely, Amaryllis" said Albus kindly, as she and Sirius approached the members of staff.

She blushed. "Thank you, Albus." At that same moment, Severus had also appeared.

"Severus, good of you to join us" Albus greeted him. "I was just telling Amaryllis how lovely she looks, don't you think?" Even with the dark lighting, Amaryllis could see his blue eyes twinkle in mirth. Instead of looking at Severus then, she quickly turned her attention to the dance floor.

"The Hall looks nice" she noted lamely. "did it take long to decorate?"

Albus opened his mouth to answer, but suddenly a loud cheer erupted. And then catcalling. Amaryllis turned to where the noise came from and saw Isabella Parish standing at the entrance of the Hall. She was wearing a gold evening gown, that Amaryllis thought was beautiful, but it was extremely low cut and most likely inappropriate for a school function. She watched as Minerva pushed through the crowd and took Isabella outside the Hall. After a few moments, she and a resentful-looking Isabella returned, and Isabella's neckline was higher. Amaryllis turned her attention back to the staff.

"Want to dance?" asked Sirius. She shook her head furiously.

"I can't dance."

"Oh, come on…we don't have to dance like _that_" said Sirius, jerking his thumb at Seamus. "Just a little?" he pleaded.

Amaryllis did not want to dance, especially not in front of Severus. She shook her head again. Sirius then turned to Pomona Sprout, who was more than happy, and he led her on to the dancefloor. Amaryllis laughed loudly as they began to dance_ just_ as wildly as Seamus. She looked at Severus finally.

"Was he like this at school?"

"Yes" he replied without hesitation. "You don't want to _enjoy_ the night like him?"

"I was serious when I said I can't dance. Can you?"

He looked at her blankly in response.

Amaryllis felt tired from the day, her feet were starting to hurt from standing and she had barely eaten lunch. "Hey, I'm just going to quickly run to the kitchen, I'm starving" she said to Severus apologetically.

"I'll accompany you" he said. "I have to do my rounds soon, anyway."

"So, what were you like at school?" she asked, once they had left the Great Hall.

"As I am now."

"Did you wear a lot of black back then too?"

"Yes."

When they arrived at the kitchens, Amaryllis ordered enough food to feed three people and she all but inhaled her first few bites. She was about to put more food in her mouth when she realised Severus was watching her. "Sorry" she said sheepishly. His expression seemed unbothered and he waved his wand, and a small table and two chairs appeared. She smiled gratefully and sat down.

"What were you like at school?" he asked.

"_As I am now_" Amaryllis sarcastically repeated his earlier answer. Severus rolled his eyes. "What do you think?" she asked.

He sat back on his chair. "Cheerful…popular".

Amaryllis snorted, and she put her fork down and sat back in her chair as well. "I assure you I was anything _but_ cheerful and popular. Besides, I had no time for that, I had to grow up fast."

"Because of the war?"

"Yes… as well as other things."

Severus looked her at her expectedly.

"Well, lived in an orphanage so I was the resident freak there, _of course" _said Amaryllis grimly. "And it didn't get any better at school because I was a Muggleborn. Then, when I turned 16, I left the orphanage and started working to support myself – and that became my life. Work and school, work and school…Eventually, I dropped out and after that I totally cut myself off from the wizarding world." she paused. "Now looking back on it, I know I could have done so much more, especially with my healing ability…I was selfish, and I turned my back on everyone". She let guilt wash over her.

Severus said nothing for a moment. Then – "Selfish is a word I could not imagine myself ever having to use to describe you" he said softly. Amaryllis looked away at once, and she heard him clear his throat. "When did you learn of your healing ability?"

She looked at him again. "I always knew about it. I thought it was normal. But after a while I realised it wasn't."

"And you didn't you tell anyone about it?"

"By the time I figured it out, I was already _out_" Amaryllis explained. "And then I heard about Harry Potter being a Parseltongue and I got scared that people would think…"

"I understand" said Severus.

Many of the students were leaving by the time Amaryllis and Severus entered the Great Hall again. They had spent most of the night together talking as she accompanied him on his rounds. Amaryllis yawned when they approached the staff.

"You and Severus can retire for the night" said Minerva.

Amaryllis looked around the Hall. "Where's Sirius?"

"Passed out in his quarters, I'm sure" Minerva replied, with a roll of her eyes.

"Oh God, I should probably check on him" Amaryllis said. "Are you sure I can't do anything here?"

"We can manage."

She turned to Severus. "Are you staying here?"

He turned to Albus and Minerva, who both gave their approval for him to leave also.

"I'm just going to quickly change before I go to Sirius. Thank you for walking me" said Amaryllis, when she and Severus reached her quarters. It was the second time he had done that now. Then she gasped. "Stay here!" She disappeared in to her quarters and quickly returned with a slim package. "This is for you – I mean for your birthday. I was meant to give it to you then" she said sheepishly. "Go on, open it!"

Severus looked slightly taken aback but opened the gift. Amaryllis had hand drawn for him a picture of the Great Lake. "It's nothing flash" she said self-consciously. "But I know how much you love Hogwarts."

He looked at the picture silently, and after a few moments he looked at her again. "Thank you, Amaryllis" he said. His voice was soft.

"it's nothing really" she said, matching his tone.

She only realised then how close they were standing. "I should get to Sirius. Thanks again…for walking me."

When Amaryllis entered her quarters, she leaned her back on the door and closed her eyes. This was easily the best Valentine's Day she'd ever had.


	13. Chapter 13

Harry

"Can you believe McGonagall last night?" Isabella said sourly. She stabbed her fork in to the plate of scrambled eggs in front of her.

It was the weekend and Harry, Ron, Ginny, Isabella and Anna were having a late breakfast in the Great Hall.

"You have to admit; your dress _was_ a bit revealing" said Ginny. "Besides, I thought you didn't have a date. Who were you trying to impress?".

Isabella scowled. "And _why _do I need a date, or someone to impress? Why can't I wear what I want to wear, because I want to wear it?" She pushed her long blonde hair to the side. "I spent all day making that damn dress too."

"Well you looked nice, regardless" Anna piped up. Isabella's expression softened. "So, what are we doing today?"

"Didn't you say you wanted to try a broom?" asked Ron eagerly.

"Oh, I was just saying – I didn't really mean it" she stammered back. She looked weakly at the others.

"Yeah, if she doesn't want to…" Harry began to say.

"Oh yeah, only if you want to. We could always do something else" offered Ron. Anna gave him a reassuring smile. Harry had noticed that Ron had grown quite fond of her. He supposed that it was because she, unlike most of the women in Ron's life, had a quiet and calm nature, comparable to Mr Weasley.

"Did you see Hermione this morning?" Ron asked Ginny.

She shrugged. "Library, I think."

He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and stood up. He then grabbed a napkin, placed two pieces of toast on it and carefully wrapped the napkin around it. "Right, I'm going to go see what she's up to." Ginny sighed and slumped on her seat when he left the table.

"What?" asked Harry.

"You guys will all be gone soon" she replied glumly.

"It won't be too long before you leave too."

It had not sunk in to Harry until that very moment that he would be graduating from Hogwarts after this year. That somehow, he, Harry Potter and his two best friends, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, who defeated Voldemort, would be graduating. Against all the odds. Against _death_. What would he do after school? Where would he go? Home? Hogwarts was his home. All at once, he felt overwhelmed, and he quickly excused himself and headed to the library to see Ron and Hermione.

"Hey" he said breathlessly once he reached their table. They both looked at him, alarmed.

"What's wrong, Harry?" asked Hermione.

"Don't tell me Voldemort is back" said Ron sarcastically.

They burst out laughing.

"No, definitely not that" said Harry, sobering up. "I just didn't realise – until now – that we'll be _graduating_ soon."

Ron blanched. "Don't remind me" he grumbled. "Mione's been on my case about it for weeks."

Harry suddenly felt alienated. Hermione hadn't mentioned it to _him_ yet.

But she must have known what he was thinking. "I was going to talk to you about it, but I didn't want to put any pressure on you" she said gently. "I feel like you've finally caught a break…"

"I think the two of you sometimes forget that you defeated Voldemort too" said Harry quietly. Hermione squeezed his hand then and Ron grinned bashfully. "So, what are your plans?"

"No idea" replied Ron, stretching his arms behind him.

"Hermione?"

She sighed. "Honestly Harry, I don't know."

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis was meeting Tonks for lunch. She left Momo with Hagrid and quickly apparated to Hogsmeade. They would be meeting at The Three Broomsticks. She arrived an hour an hour ahead of schedule and decided spontaneously to get her hair cut.

"I'm Kristy, I'll be taking care of you!" the young woman said enthusiastically. She looked vibrant with her short pink hair. "So what are we doing today?"

"I think I want to go shorter…maybe just below my shoulders?"

"That will look amazing!" Kristy marvelled. She put a cape around Amaryllis and brushed out her hair.

The cut took around 25 minutes and Amaryllis was happy when she looked in the mirror. Kristy had cut her hair into a long bob. She left the salon and decided to wait for Tonks at The Three Broomsticks. Tonks entered the pub just as she took her seat at a table.

"Tonks!"

"Hey" said Tonks breathlessly. She hugged Amaryllis before sitting down. "I thought I was going to be late. It took me _forever_ to put Teddy down for a nap."

"You should have brought him!" exclaimed Amaryllis. "We could have always gone somewhere else if it was too loud here."

Tonks looked sheepish. "Well, I just thought – I didn't know if you would be Ok with me bringing him."

"Oh please, it's just me," said Amaryllis, waving her hand in dismissal. "The only thing wrong I could see about bringing Teddy would be me getting baby fever!"

Tonks laughed. "I like your hair by the way" she remarked in approval.

"Thank you! I just got it cut before you came. I can't even remember the last time I went to a hairdresser."

"Same" snickered Tonks, and she scrunched her face. Her mousy brown hair turned to bright purple.

"_You're a_ _Metamorphmagus_!" gasped Amaryllis. "How am I only finding out about this now?"

Tonks shrugged. "_So_" she dropped her voice. "Sirius mentioned to me this morning you might have some news to tell me."

Amaryllis felt her ears burn. "Is that right?" she said lowly. "What else did he say?"

"Nothing really. He's good at keeping his mouth shut – when he wants to anyway. So what's up?"

"Oh, not much really."

Tonks looked at her doubtfully.

"Ok fine. So…I may or may not have asked Severus to the Ball."

Tonks's eyes widened. "_What!_" she exclaimed. "No way! What happened?"

"He said no, obviously."

"How?" asked Tonks incredulously, and she leaned in anticipately as if she were watching a game of Quidditch.

Amaryllis laughed. "He literally just said 'no'." She imitated Severus's voice. "Honestly, I couldn't tell you anything else. I legged it out of there pretty much straightaway –" Tonks burst out laughing, and while doing so, banged the table loudly with her hand, drawing the attention of nearly everybody in the pub. "Oh shut up, _Nymphadora_, it's not that funny."

"Sorry" said Tonks. She tried to quieten herself, but burst in to small bouts of laughter as she began to speak again. "So what happened after that? How are you two like now?"

"I think we're fine"

"Do you fancy him?" asked Tonks.

Amaryllis bit her lip. "I think I do" she admitted; whether to Tonks or to herself, she was not sure. "It doesn't even matter."

Tonks sighed. "I wish I could give you some good advice said sincerely. "But all I can tell you is to hang in there, if you really want to be with him – that's what I did anyway…I guess mine and Remus's circumstances were different though…"

"It just hurts a little because he's always around me."

Tonks reached over the table and gave Amaryllis's hand a squeeze. "I know" she said gently.

Severus 

Severus had decided to spend the day reorganising his personal supply of potions. he had considered going to Spinner's End but ultimately decided to remain at Hogwarts. _Truthfully_, he had found himself hoping to spend time more with Amaryllis, but to his dismay she was absent at breakfast. There was a knock on the door and he groaned when he opened it and saw Dumbledore smiling at him.

"Headmaster" said Severus curtly. He reluctantly opened the door wider. Dumbledore took a seat in the living room; he waved his hand and a pot of tea and two cups appeared on the coffee table. sighed. "Is there something you wish to speak to me about, Headmaster?" He remained standing.

"I just noticed Amaryllis had gone out for the day and I thought you would be free" Dumbledore replied nonchalantly. Severus grunted in response. "She is nice, don't you think Severus?"

He did not respond.

"There is no need to be hostile, Severus. I was just making an observation." Dumbledore paused. "She seems to have taken a liking to you –"

"And so what if she has?" hissed Severus.

"Something can come of it."

"_Nothing can!_"

"And why not?" asked Dumbledore, unphased at Severus's tone.

"You know why."

"Could you not make room for her in your heart?"

"No."

"Any why not?" asked Dumbledore. "What flaw does she possess?"

"No flaw" said Severus. "Lily –"

"She is not _Lily_."

"Exactly. I don't want anyone else."

"How do you know that?"

"I know" said Severus. He wondered if Dumbledore could also hear the uncertainty in his voice.

"You are a foolish man, Severus." Dumbledore stood up, as if he had had enough, and the tea pot and cups vanished. Without another word he left.

Severus was dumbfounded as he stood alone in his living room – and then he felt _furious_. Determined to get the last word, he followed Dumbledore's suit. He slammed his door hard behind him.

"_Severus_"

It was _of course_ the familiar, soft voice of Amaryllis Swan. She was behind him. He turned around to look at her, expecting to explode in anger, but it all disappeared when he saw her face. And then the unexpected happened: It was as if some powerful force pulled Severus to Amaryllis in that moment. He strode the nine or ten steps between them and kissed her on the lips.


	14. Chapter 14

Amaryllis 

"So he just kissed you?" asked Sirius incredulously. "Just like that!"

"Sirius, calm down" Amaryllis said patiently. They were in her quarters now, and she sat down next to him on the sofa. He moved away, recoiling. "You're overreacting! Look, I get that you hate –"

"It's got nothing to do with that, Milly!" He stood up. "He's a bloody git, yes. But what gets me the most is that he rejected you – and now he's out there _snogging_ you!" Amaryllis's lips twitched, but Sirius seemed to be in no joking mood. "Oh, you think it's funny, do you?" he snapped.

"No!" she exclaimed. She pulled him back on to the sofa. "It's just that you're overreacting. It was just a kiss!"

"You wouldn't be thinking it was _just a kiss_ if it was Filch."

"Well obviously not" Amaryllis said, rolling her eyes. "Besides, I'm sure you did things like that plenty when you were younger."

"Yeah, when I was _younger_" Sirius shot back. "And I'm now much older, and so is he."

She sighed. "Sirius, I appreciate your concern. I do – but I'm a grown woman! If I didn't feel comfortable, I would have punched him in the face – or hexed him! I'm a qualified witch you know." She smiled at him reassuringly and he relaxed back on the sofa a micron. He scrunched his face suddenly. "What?" she asked.

"I know I'm going to regret asking this, but as your friend, I supposed I'm obliged – How was the kiss?" Sirius shuddered.

She paused. "I think it was OK – It was fast. And I don't think he really _meant_ it." He looked at her questioningly. "I kinda get the feeling it was a spur of the moment type of thing. He looked really angry, actually."

"Great."

She was momentarily. "Sirius, I want to tell you something, but I'm scared you're going to get really mad" she said in a quiet voice.

Sirius blanched. "Oh God, don't tell me you slept with him." He put his face in his hands.

"That was actually my first kiss, ever" Amaryllis confessed.

His head snapped up immediately. _"What?"_ he hissed, and he tried to stand up again but she pulled him back down on to the sofa. "I'm going to kill him."

"I don't care about him kissing me!" she cried. "Please, just listen to me." He visibly calmed. "I just – I don't know. I thought there would be _fireworks_ or something. And there wasn't…Maybe you were right all along, Sirius" she said sadly. She put her head on his shoulder, thankful when he said no more.

Harry 

June had arrived, and Harry, Ron and Hermione were set going to graduate. Harry packed his suitcase for the very last time. There were so many memories he had made here; being welcomed in to Gryffindor, Quidditch practice, Hermione slapping Malfoy, Ron vomiting slugs, the Yule Ball, meeting Luna Lovegood, the DA meetings, kissing Ginny for the very first time…every moment he shared with Ron and Hermione. And now finally he would be leaving the place where it all started.

They sat on the edge of the Astronomy Tower, looking out on to the horizon.

"It's weird, huh?" murmured Ron.

"I'll say" said Harry. He stood up, so Ron and Hermione could face him while they sat. "You two ready?"

"With everything we've done already, we should be…right?" said Hermione, though her voice was laced with doubt.

"Thank you" said Harry suddenly. "For everything. Everything you two have done for me, everything you've given me…I could spend my whole life trying to repay you and I still wouldn't be able to make a scratch."

"Shut up, Harry" laughed Ron. Tears were brimming from his eyes. He stood up and put his arm around Harry and pulled Hermione up, so they were huddled together.

"We love you, Harry" she said softly.

The three friends broke apart and looked out on to the horizon, with both happiness and sadness, for the last time.


	15. Chapter 15

Isabella 

Mr and Mrs Weasley had invited Isabella to stay with them after she graduated. Having been officially disowned, she had nowhere to go and for the first time in her life, she had no money. While she was relieved that she had somewhere to live, she could not help feeling like a burden; the Weasley home was already so overcrowded as it was. For the time being, she stayed with Ginny in her room.

"I need to get a job" she groaned. "I don't know what the bloody hell I'm going to do once you leave for Hogwarts again."

"You have time to figure it out" said Ginny lazily. They were both eating Bertie Bott's while hanging upside down from the bed.

"I know – it's just that I have absolutely no backup, you know? I know that Harry asked me to travel with him, Ron and Hermione but I could tell he was just trying to be polite."

"I get what you mean. But honestly Mum and Dad are fine with you staying here for as long as you like."

"Yeah, I guess" sighed Isabella. She went to pick up another jelly bean, but Ginny grabbed her hand.

"It's going to be Ok, Bells" she promised. As Isabella opened her mouth to reply, Mrs Weasley burst through the door.

"Girls, there is so much to do before the graduation party!" she cried. "Ginny, will you _get up_ and clean the lounge room! And Isabella dear, could you please help me cut the vegetables?"

Ginny let out a frustrated groan after her mother closed the door.

"Why are we bloody cleaning the house if the party is at _Sirius's_ place?" she protested. "Sorry, you have to do all this."

But Isabella didn't mind at all, Mrs Weasley had been very kind to her. "It's just a tiny bit of work. You're such a _princess_ Ginny Weasley" she joked.

Ginny picked up a jellybean and threw it at her.

She sighed. "Ok, let's try and get this done quickly so we can relax when Anna gets here".

"Done."

As Isabella walked in to the kitchen, she was almost trampled by Fred and George Weasley, who were both running from their mother.

"Both of you OUT" screamed Mrs Weasley.

"C'mon Mum, we're just trying to help!" protested Fred.

"The only thing you're trying to do is_ destroy_ everything."

"Yeah_, boys_" said Isabella, mimicking Mrs Weasley. The twins glared at her.

"Oh, it's on" said George, and they left the kitchen at once, undoubtably conspiring their revenge.

Isabella turned to Mrs Weasley and smiled at her sweetly.

"Don't give me that look Miss" she said in a warning tone. "I don't want you being trouble like those two."

"Never" Isabella replied innocently.

She had never prepared food in her life, but Mrs Weasley was a very good teacher. They finished the cooking in no time and she realised she actually enjoyed the experience. She ran back upstairs to Ginny's room and found Fred and George hovering near the door.

"Whatever you think you're going to do, don't bother. I'm 100 steps in front of you" Isabella said casually from behind them. They spun around quickly and smiled at her mischievously. She merely rolled her eyes and motioned for them to move out of the doorway.

Once inside, she closed the door behind her and collapsed on the bed. She felt drained mentally, from constant thoughts regarding the uncertainty of her future. She had no interests, no hobbies – she was smart, but she didn't know how to translate that into a career.

"Oh hey" said Ginny, opening the door. "Finally done." She flopped on to the bed next to Isabella.

"What are you wearing tonight?" Isabella asked, turning her body so they lay facing each other.

"No idea. You?"

"I don't really have any nice clothes. Your Mum wouldn't mind if I wore my gold dress, right?" Isabella suggested jokingly.

Ginny snorted. "Oh yeah, she'll be _fine_ with that" she said. "You can borrow my clothes if you want, but it's going to be pretty casual. Sirius is really laid back".

At the sound of his name, Isabella immediately perked up. Sirius was quite possibly the only person in the world that she knew she could relate to.

Anna 

Anna had spent the morning house hunting. Now that she was 18 years old, she was required to leave the orphanage. She had seen many houses and units but her choices were limited as most places were out of her budget. She had gotten a job when she was 15 years old, so she had a considerable amount of savings and she would be receiving a grant from the Muggle government to aid her financially. Unfortunately however, it still was not enough for Anna's ideal home.

She laid down on her bed and massaged her temples. Soon, she would have to get ready and go out again. She would be staying with the Weasleys over the weekend for the graduation party Sirius Black was hosting.

Anna quickly packed a small bag and apparated to the address Ron had given her. When she arrived, she was immediately met by a crop field and was unsure she had come to the right place.

"Could I help you?" said a voice behind her. She turned around to a middle-aged, red-haired man; he had a kind face.

"I'm Anna Li–"

"Oh Anna! I'm Arthur Weasley, Ron's dad" said Mr Weasley. He smiled warmly at her and led her through the field to the house. "Molly! Ginny!" he called out when they entered the living room. Anna noticed that there were at least four levels to the house, and she looked up and saw heads pop out of each level.

"Anna!" exclaimed Ginny. She and Isabella ran down the stairs and hugged Anna in turn. "Did you find the house alright?"

"Yeah, thanks to your Dad" she said, looking at Mr Weasley gratefully.

"Who's this then?" Anna poked her head around Ginny and saw two older red-haired boys. They were twins, presumably Fred and George.

"This is Anna" said Ginny.

"Nice to meet you" one twin said, winking. "I'm George."

Anna immediately felt her cheeks heat up as she shook his hand. "Likewise" She heard sniggering around her.

"Oh stop it" snapped Ginny. "That" She pointed to the boy who shook Anna's hand. "Is Fred. That's George." She jerked her thumb at the other boy. Anna looked at them both next to each other and noticed Fred was slightly taller than George. She made a mental note of it to help her differentiate them in the future.

"You ruin all the fun" said Fred.

George came forward. "Nice to meet you" he said, smiling. "So you're the infamous Anna, huh?" He smirked. "We've heard you're very _rowdy_."

Her eyes widened in horror. "Oh no. I'm really not, I swear" she said hastily. They all laughed, and her cheeks heated more intensely from embarrassment.

"Leave the poor girl alone" an older red-haired woman scolded George. She smiled kindly at Anna. "So nice to see you, Anna dear."

"This is our Mum if you couldn't tell" George joked.

Mrs Weasley engulfed Anna in a hug.

"Thank you for having me" she said in a small voice once Mrs Weasley let go of her. "I hope it's not too much trouble."

"Not at all!" said Mr Weasley happily. "The more the merrier, we always say."

"Come on" said Ginny, pulling Anna's arm now. "Let's put your stuff away."

Once Anna, Ginny and Isabella were all in Ginny's room, Anna felt more relaxed. She had anxiety and meeting new people was always daunting for her her. They sat cross-legged on the carpet.

"Hopefully we can all fit on this bed" sighed Ginny. "I'll just sleep on the floor if not."

"I'm fine to sleep on the floor" Anna said quickly. "Really."

Ginny opened her mouth but was interrupted by a loud bang. "It's probably just Fred and George" she said absentmindedly. She looked at Anna then. "What have you been up to?"

"Just house hunting. The orphanage kicked me out" said Anna, attempting to sound cool. But she quickly changed her tone when she saw the looks of horror on Ginny and Isabella's face. "I mean, they didn't really _kick me out_. But now that I'm 18, I do have to leave."

"God, you almost gave me a heart attack" said Isabella, dramatically clutching her heart. "So where are you going to go?"

"I don't know" Anna answered grimly. "I want to stay close to London but it's so expensive." She suddenly remembered Isabella's owl to her. "Oh! I was meant to tell you. I asked my manager if he was hiring and he said he could give you a trial. I mean the money isn't amazing but –"

She was interrupted as Isabella tackled her in to a hug.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" she sang. "I was just saying to Ginny how I need a job!" Her eyes widened. "I just had the best idea. We could be housemates! That'd make rent a bit cheaper, right?"

"Let's just see how you go on trial first" Anna laughed. Truthfully, she did not want to get her hopes up. She had considered shared housing but felt anxious at the prospect of sharing a house with strangers. Living with her friend seemed far more attractive to her.

"Where's Ron?" she asked, suddenly realising his absence.

"Think he's out with Harry and Hermione," said Ginny. "We should probably start getting ready for the party soon."


	16. Chapter 16

Amaryllis 

In the rush of getting ready for the graduation party, Amaryllis had almost burnt her skirt whilst ironing. She straightened out her clothes again and gave herself a once-over in the mirror. Not phased with her reflection, she apparated to Grimmauld Place.

"Wotcher Milly!" greeted Tonks cheerfully, and she almost tripped on a chair while walking up to her friend. As she opened her mouth to say more, the sudden ringing of Teddy's wail could be heard in the distance and she quickly excused herself.

Amaryllis looked around the room awkwardly. Aside from Tonks and Sirius, she really did not know anyone on more than an acquaintance basis.

Finally, Neville Longbottom approached her; he was with an older woman. "Professor Swan, this is my Nan." He put his arm around her.

"Augusta" she said politely. "Neville has had nothing but kind words to say about you."

"He's been a wonderful student" said Amaryllis, smiling at both of them. "You must be very proud."

"Oh yes" remarked Augusta. "He has certainly grown in to a fine young man, hasn't he?" She looked at grandson fondly. "His parents would be proud."

"I'm sure they are…" Truthfully, Amaryllis was not sure where Neville's parents were.

But Augusta must have sensed what she was thinking. "They're still at St Mungo's" she informed her. "Unfortunately what brought the dead back did not bring Alice and Frank…"

Amaryllis held Augusta's hand and gave it a small squeeze. "They're here, and they're proud of Neville" she said. "And grateful for the wonderful job you've done raising him"

Augusta smiled sadly. "Yes, I'm sure." She turned to Neville. "I'm feeling a little tired. Neville dear, would you take me to my seat?" He gave Amaryllis an apologetic smile, but she shook her head slightly and wordlessly expressed for him not to worry.

Sirius was nowhere in sight. Thankfully, Tonks signalled to her from across the room and Amaryllis joined the group she was standing with. She recognised Remus, James, Bill, Fleur and Charlie, though the latter she had never had the opportunity to talk to.

"Nice to see you, Amaryllis" said Remus. "You must be happy to be on break."

"Definitely. I've been enjoying sleeping in a lot, that's for sure" replied Amaryllis. "How are you doing?" she asked, looking around the group. Everybody murmured their responses, but Tonks cut through them all.

"Charlie's just gotten back from Romania actually" she said loudly. The group stared at her. "Um, I think Sirius said he was looking for us." And she quickly pulled everyone away, so Amaryllis stood alone with Charlie.

"Sorry about that" he said sheepishly. "I think Tonks has picked up matchmaking skills from my mother – though to be fair, Mum has a little more _tact._"

"I don't doubt it" Amaryllis replied. They stood there awkwardly, probably waiting for the other to speak first. She decided to break the ice. "Well go on, how was Romania then?"

Annoyed as she was at Tonks, Amaryllis enjoyed talking to Charlie. He had a vast knowledge of dragons which fascinated her. Additionally, he was funny and very easy to talk to. She must have lost track of time because when she looked up again, there were almost twice as many people in the room since she looked last. She saw Sirius at last at front of the dining room. He was holding up a goblet and she did not have to guess what the contents were inside it. He appeared to be slightly unbalanced.

"Let us all raise our glasses to Harry Potter, Ronald Weasley, Hermione Granger, Neville Longbottom, Isabella Parish and Anna Lindsay" Sirius toasted. "May your future be brighter than your past."

Everybody held up their glasses and cheered, yelling out their congratulations and clanking their glasses together. Molly announced more food, and many made their way to tables. Amaryllis excused herself from Charlie to check on Sirius. He drunkenly put his arm around her when she approached him.

"Sirius, you need to stop drinking so much."

He belched loudly. "_Mill-ay_, 's a party."

Irritated, she took him to a nearby table and poured out a glass of water. She tried to get him to drink it, but he brushed her off and stumbled towards James and Remus.

"You shouldn't need to babysit him" drawled a familiar voice behind her.

Amaryllis spun around quickly. "When did you get here?" She ignored the comment about Sirius. Severus didn't reply, leading her to suspect that he had arrived a while ago, she just hadn't noticed until now. "Are you enjoying the party?" she asked, hoping to alleviate the tension.

He grunted in response but spoke further upon seeing her eye roll. "Fine. How is your break fairing?" he asked, leaning on the table.

"Alright" replied Amaryllis. "Yours? – What do you even do in the break?" she asked curiously. She sat on the table next to Severus, so her feet were dangling inches above the ground.

"Research."

"Research on what?"

"Mostly potions."

"Any breakthroughs?"

"Some, though I am still perfecting them."

"Cool" said Amaryllis. She paused, unsure whether to continue with her train of thought. "It must be something to you to be seeing them all graduate."

"Indeed" he replied. "Longbottom has done quite well, for what he was…"

"I heard you were pretty hard on him while he was in school" she said softly. "Maybe you even feel guilty about it now…but I guess you trained him for the years to come, how tough it was going to get."

He remained silent. "Perhaps" he said finally.

There was a sudden loud crash, and Amaryllis sighed in frustration when she realised who the culprit was. "Sorry, I should go put Sirius to bed. It was lovely seeing you, Severus."


	17. Chapter 17

Anna

It was Sunday morning and those who made it back to the Burrow after the graduation party were nursing their hangovers. Anna, unlike the others did not drink and woke up early. She decided to help Mrs Weasley prepare breakfast.

"Are you sure you wouldn't like to stay a little longer?" asked Mrs Weasley

"Oh – Yeah, I'm Ok" replied Anna. 'And there's so many people here already…"

Don't be silly, dear. Ginny and Isabella are enjoying having you here for the break."

"I know. And I'm having fun with them too – It's just that I have to start packing my things and looking for somewhere to live now that I've graduated" Anna explained. Mrs Weasley looked at her sadly. "It's not that bad, honestly" she said. And it was the truth. As daunting as becoming independent was, Anna was looking forward to finally living a life outside of the orphanage.

"Oh God, don't breathe so loudly" grumbled Isabella. She tried to keep her balance walking into the kitchen but almost fell while attempting to sit on a chair.

Anna quickly poured coffee into a teacup and put it in front of Isabella. "How was your sleep?" she asked sympathetically. Isabella looked as if she was trying to give her a thumbs up but only managed to slightly raise her hand.

"Good morning all" said Fred cheerfully, as he walked into the kitchen. He took the seat opposite of Anna and smiled brightly at Isabella.

"_What the Hell?_" she hissed; she ignored Mrs Weasley's visible disapproval. "How are you so _awake_?" At that same moment Ron, Ginny and George walked into the kitchen, looking as chipper as Fred.

"_Weasleys_ are not lightweights" Fred said smugly.

"How did you sleep, Anna?" asked Ron. "Hopefully Ginny and Bella's snoring didn't keep you up all night". They both scowled at him.

"Not at all" replied Anna, and she tried to conceal a smile. "How about you?"

"Like a baby" Fred replied instead of Ron. Isabella poked her tongue at him. "_So_, I was thinking we should have a friendly game of Quidditch when Harry and Hermione come over later."

"Urgh, why is everybody so obsessed with Quidditch?" groaned Isabella. "Can't we just lay around the house?"

"_You_ can do that" quipped George, "The rest of us are playing – You in, Anna?".

"Oh, um, probably not sorry" she stammered. "I'm going home later; I've got a bunch of things to do."

"Oh, come on" said Ginny. "Just stay one more day, please?"

"If she wants to go, don't force her" said Ron.

"It's not that I _want_ to go" Anna clarified quickly. "It's just that I have things to do." She could feel her ears burning from the pressure; she hated being the centre of attention.

"Well at least stay for the first game" suggested Fred.

She nodded reluctantly. "Sure."

Everybody began to eat, but Anna still felt uneasy. "I'm just going to quickly go to the bathroom" she excused herself.

Once in the confinement of the toilet, she let out a huge breath and tried to calm her racing heartbeat. Anna had anxiety from an early age, and while medication helped her, she still had moments where she felt extremely overwhelmed. She closed her eyes and took three deep breaths. When she opened her eyes again, she wordlessly asked herself: '_What can you see? What can you hear? What can you smell?' _Her psychologist had taught her many coping mechanisms to ground herself but asking those three questions helped her the most. She could see a spider in its web on the right corner of the ceiling; she could hear the feint sound of water leaking from the faucet; and she could smell the air freshener inside the toilet. Anna took another deep breath and eventually felt her heartbeat stabilize. She turned on the faucet and splashed water on to her face, then wiped her hands on the back of her jeans. She felt alright now.

When she opened the door, Ron was leaning on the opposite wall.

"Sorry about that" he said apologetically.

"It's Ok, Ron – really."

"You looked pretty pale when you left."

Anna thought about lying but it was easier to tell the truth. "I have anxiety" she explained. "Especially around new people." Ron nodded sincerely, though she was sure he did not really understand the complexity of it. "I hope the others didn't notice."

"Doubt it" Ron assured her. "Or at least, not Fred and George – if that's who you're worried about. They're pretty daft." She laughed.

"Hermione's here!" they heard Ginny call from the kitchen. In their absence, Bill, Fleur, Lupin, Tonks, Charlie, Sirius, Lily and James had arrived at the Burrow with Harry and Hermione.

She sat on the grass with Isabella and Hermione while the others got ready to play Quidditch on the field. Fred ran over to them before it began; he took off his jumper and threw it in Isabella's face.

"Hope you lose" Isabella called out sweetly, as Fred ran back on to the field. Anna suddenly felt extremely envious of her. Isabella was charming, funny, outgoing and could talk to anybody. And Anna was the complete opposite. Socially awkward, quiet and boring. She knew she should not have been comparing herself to others, but at times she could not help but feel like a complete wallflower.

Amaryllis

Time had been going slowly after the first week of the break and Amaryllis felt more bored than ever. She had decided to take up gardening and grew some herbs on the terrace of her home. She was watering the parsley when an owl almost flew into her. She gave the owl some space to gather itself and then patted it on the head when she took the tiny scroll from its beak. _'Hi Amaryllis, Was wondering if you'd like to meet up for a drink some time? Charlie.' _Amaryllis raised her eyebrows in surprise but quickly scribbled down a response asking if he was free later in the day. Within the hour, the owl had come back, and Charlie confirmed their plans to meet each other at The Three Broomsticks at 1pm.

Truthfully, she felt hesitant to see him, in case he was interested in her, but she thought it would be rude to decline.

It was quite cold so Amaryllis put on a coat and a beanie with a bauble on the top. When she arrived at the Three Broomsticks, Charlie was already at a table waiting for her.

"Hey!" She wasn't sure if they were supposed to shake hands or hug, so she just put an arm around his shoulder in a half hug. They sat down, and he ordered two Butterbeers.

"How have you been?"

"Good. Haven't really been doing anything" Amaryllis replied truthfully. "How about you?"

"Same old" Charlie replied, but then he paused. "Actually, there's a reason I called you." Amaryllis felt her stomach drop. "I actually fancy a girl – a Muggle girl – and I just wanted to ask you for your advice."

She felt a wave of relief wash over her.

"Sorry" he said sheepishly. "I just don't have any friends who are female. I mean, I know Tonks but…"

"No, that's fine!" Amaryllis assured him. "So what's happening with her? Who is she? How did you meet her? So many questions!"

Charlie laughed. "Well, I actually don't know her name. She works at this Muggle café I started going to."

"Have you spoken to her yet?" Their Butterbeers arrived.

"Only when she takes my order, but that's about it" Charlie laughed. "Plus, it's pretty busy whenever I go."

"Maybe go around closing time?".

"Yeah, I guess…I _was_ thinking of doing the whole 'write my phone number on the napkin' thing – but I don't have a telephone, so that's out of the question."

"That's a terrible way to do it anyway" said Amaryllis, shaking her head. "You should get to know her. That's putting in effort."

"What do I say to her?"

"Can you think of anything she likes?"

"Umm, not really…she wears a lot of pins? I don't know what they mean though."

"Perfect! Ask her about them the next time you see her".

"Ok, I'll try that" said Charlie, smiling. "Thanks."

Amaryllis and Charlie talked for the next two hours about different topics, including Severus. When she left the Three Broomsticks, she decided to pop in to Flourish and Blotts to see the new releases.

Amaryllis had entered an aisle and saw Severus immersed in an open book he was holding.

"It's like I can't shake you" she joked.

Severus looked up and closed the book he was reading. "It's not my fault you follow me everywhere."

"Ha-ha" said Amaryllis, rolling her eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"What do you think?"

"You came to Diagon Alley just to get a book?"

"I have other things to get. Yourself?"

"I had a drink with Charlie" Amaryllis said without thinking. "Not in a date way" she added quickly. When Severus made no response, she decided to change the subject. "What are you reading?"

Amaryllis took a step forward to take the book out of his hands but tripped over her own feet; he automatically dropped the book to catch her and helped her regain her balance.

She looked up expecting his annoyance but all saw was his black eyes boring in to her own. They were only inches apart now.

Amaryllis stood up on her toes and with her hands, brought Severus's face down to her level. She brushed her lips against his lightly and he swiftly pulled her closer to him. This kiss was _definitely_ not like their first kiss. It was passionate and deep, and full of feeling and longing. Severus brought his hands down to her waist and was holding Amaryllis so close to him now that she could barely feel her feet touching the floor. A loud thud quickly broke them apart. Amaryllis stood catching her breath, and after a few moments she looked at Severus. He considered her for a moment, before picking up his book and walking out of the aisle.


	18. Chapter 18

**Hey guys! Thank you so much for reading so far, and thank you so much especially for your reviews! I've definitely taken all your words constructively and I'm going to try and do better each time. Please keep leaving your reviews. I really appreciate them! :)**

Anna 

Anna worked at a bookstore in London called The Page Turner. It was the most perfect job for her because reading was her favourite hobby, and she could easily spend every shift sifting through the book shelves and immersing herself into a new world. She loved even more to make up her own stories, sometimes on parchment, sometimes just in her head. Of course she knew the chances were slim but she hoped one day to become a published fictional author.

Isabella's trial had gone well and within a week, Anna's manager Chris had offered Isabella a part time position. Anna had known Chris and his family for many years and was very good friends with his son Thomas. Over time she had developed a crush on him, though even in her wildest dreams she would never tell him, especially so because he was one of the most popular boys in town.

"Where do you want this?" asked Thomas, lugging a huge box in to the living room. Anna and Isabella had just signed a lease for their new unit in London, and while she didn't necessarily need help moving – because magic – Thomas had offered her his help.

"Just put it anywhere" she replied, putting her own box on the ground. "Thanks for helping me out today."

"No problems, Annie" he said. He put his hand through this blonde hair. "Must be exciting having your own place."

"Yeah, I guess…What about you? Excited to be starting University?"

He sighed, and sat on the box he put down. "Sort of. I wish I could have had more of a break though."

"For your music?"

"Yeah…but Dad thinks it's a waste of time, of course."

"You should ask him to come to more of your shows" said Anna gently.

"Maybe." He yawned.

"You should go home. Isabella will be here soon anyway, so we'll finish the rest."

"Oh yeah, Dad told me he hired your friend. What's she like?" asked Thomas.

Anna felt her stomach sink a little. Isabella was very much the _type_ of girl he would be interested in. "She's really nice" she replied truthfully. At that same moment, Isabella walked in to the unit, wheeling her suitcase behind her.

"Looks homely already" she commented, while looking around. From the corner of Anna's eye, she could see Thomas visibly perk up.

"I'm Thomas" he said. He quickly stood up and offered Isabella his hand.

"Isabella" she replied. When he turned around to pick up her suitcase, she mouthed _Muggle_ to Anna questioningly. Anna nodded her head.

"Thomas is actually Chris's son" she said.

"Oh right!" exclaimed Isabella, "Guess I'll be seeing you around then." She turned to Anna then. "Everyone's going to Sirius's tonight. You coming?"

"No, I have a few things to do" Anna replied apologetically. Isabella shrugged, before disappearing in to her room, and Anna turned back to Thomas, who was still looking at the spot Isabella had just moved from.

Isabella 

When Isabella and Ginny had arrived at Grimmauld Place, everybody was sitting around the dining table listening to Sirius and James tell stories from when they were at school. Needing to use the bathroom, she quickly excused herself. As she walked along the hall, she came across the Black Family Tapestry. _The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black 'Toujours pur'_. Isabella scoffed. She looked closer to find Sirius's photo, gingerly touching the area where his face had been blasted off. She looked curiously at the face next to his: _Regulus Black_.

"Master Regulus was a great wizard." Isabella turned around and saw Kreacher. She had not been formally introduced to him. He stood at a short distance from her.

She turned back around so she could see the tapestry again. "He's dead" she said, and a lump formed in her throat.

"Yes."

"How old was he?"

"18."

"Oh" Isabella closed her eyes and gripped the necklace Sam made her, the lump forming in her throat became almost too much to bear.

"You alright, Isabella?"

She opened her eyes and saw Sirius. He stood next to her now and Kreacher had disappeared.

"I didn't know about your brother…" She cleared her throat. "We should get back to the group." She began to walk away, but Sirius held her arm.

"I need somebody to talk to about Regulus" he said quietly. "Maybe you can talk to me about Sam?"

Isabella agreed wordlessly. They sat down, for what felt like hours – millenniums even, and talked about their childhood, their family, Sam, Regulus, and the happiness of being disowned.

Severus

Severus was angry with himself for getting involved with Amaryllis _yet_ again. He tried to keep his distance from her but whenever she was near, he could not help himself. He felt so drawn to her. She had crept up on him; how and when he could not pinpoint, but thoughts of her constantly plagued his mind.

He sighed and got ready. He was expecting Lily to visit, and he hoped that Amaryllis would not be brought up.

"How has your break been going?" she asked.

"Fine" replied Severus curtly. She narrowed her eyes at him. "I have been reading a lot" he elaborated.

"Good." She looked around the house. "Have you had any visitors?"

"No" Lily said nothing, she took a sip of her tea. Severus internally groaned. "Something you wish to say?" he asked.

"Nothing, just wondering if you've been seeing Ama –"

Severus cut across her. "Enough about her" he snapped. She raised her eyebrows at him. In the history of their friendship, Severus had never raised his voice at her. He opened his mouth to apologise, but she spoke again.

"Well obviously there's something there. I see you two together all the time."

"There's nothing there" Severus lied.

"Why? Is she not good enough for you?"

"No, she's –"

"Or she's not smart enough?"

"No."

"You find her annoying?"

"Lily, enough" said Severus, he could hear his voice become strained.

"Severus, what's stopping you?" asked Lily gently.

"I don't know."

"Is it me?"

A beat of silence.

"No."

"You have feelings for her" said Lily. A small smile pulled on her face. "And she has feelings for you."

Severus sighed. "You don't understand, Lily…"

"I understand perfectly, Sev. You're scared of opening your heart to her…scared she'll run away. You probably have your parents at the back of your mind too."

"I just don't see it working out" he said bitterly.

"You see what you want to see."

"It's too much."

"_Too much_ was when you became a spy for Dumbledore. _Too much_ was when you became a spy for Voldemort. This is nothing."

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis spent the afternoon curled up on the sofa reading a Muggle novel. She had gotten some recommendations from her friends and found most of them quite enjoyable. There was a knock at the door and she reuctantly peeled herself off the sofa to answer it; she wasn't expecting any visitors.

It was Severus.

"Oh, it's you" she said coldly. She not heard from him since their encounter at Flourish and Botts, even while writing him several times. She was starting to feel used. "Is there something that you want?"

"I wanted to apologise" he said.

"For what?" she asked rhetorically. "Oh, you mean for the second time you kissed me – and then ignored me? Or maybe –"

She was cut short when Severus pulled her in to a kiss. She responded instantly and pulled him inside, and out of the doorway. He kicked the door closed behind him.

Suddenly, as if only realising now what she was doing, Amaryllis pulled away from him, and pushed his chest. "_What the hell?_" she cried in frustration. "Is this a game to you?"

He had the nerve to roll eyes.

Her jaw dropped. "Excuse me_?_" she shrieked. His lips twitched. "This is not a laughing matter!"

"No, it isn't. I am trying to tell you something."

"What?" There was a moment of silence. Severus opened his mouth but then closed it quickly, he seemed to be struggling to find words.

"Every time…I've left" he said finally. "But I'm not leaving today."

"So what, _you like me now_?" He glared at her. "I need an answer.""

"Yes."

Amaryllis felt doubtful at this point, it felt almost too good to be true. "Are you sure?"

"Yes."

Sirius 

"So you two are actually together now?" asked Sirius. He pretended to gag.

"Yes Sirius, for the hundredth time" replied Amaryllis. "Why is it so hard to believe?"

"Because he's in love with Lily." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop himself and he realised how hurtful they were with one look at Amaryllis. "I'm sorry, Milly" he said gently. "I wasn't trying to upset you. I was just trying to look out for you."

This seemed to pacify her, because she held his hand and gave it a squeeze. "Sirius, I appreciate what you're trying to do, but I'm sure about this. Can you please be the tiniest bit happy for me?"

Sirius sighed. "I'm happy if you're happy."

...

Sirius was not at all happy – nor was he convinced. When he returned to Grimmauld Place that afternoon, he sent an owl to Snape requesting to meet.

"What is this about, Black?" His wand was firmly in his grip.

"Calm down" said Sirius, rolling his eyes. "It's about Mil – Amaryllis."

He gestured for Snape to sit.

"What about her?" Snape asked suspiciously. He remained standing.

"Rumour has it the two if you have become exclusive. I want to make sure you're not screwing around with her – and if you are, then end it."

"And what makes you think I'm _screwing around with her_?"

_Because you're an arsehole_, thought Sirius. "Just checking" he replied.

"Well, it's none –"

"Oh, it is my business, Snape" he said threateningly. "It is my absolute bloody business when it comes to Milly, and you've hurt her in the past and I'll be damned if I let you do it again. So I'm asking you one more time, are you screwing around with her, or is this serious?"

Snape glared at him.

"Serious" he said finally. There was awkward silence after that.

"Right" said Sirius. "Well, good. Don't push her to do anything, you already ruined her first kiss." Snape looked confused. "Oh, she didn't tell you that part…and uh, make sure she's ready before you two take that _step –_"

Snape had already stormed out the door before Sirius could finish his sentence.


	19. Chapter 19

Anna 

Anna woke up early and decided to go Diagon Alley to purchase parchment and quills that were currently on sale. With her now having to budget more than ever, she needed to take advantage of any ways to save money. She finished brushing her hair and went to the kitchen to grab a piece of toast before heading out, Isabella was eating cereal at the table.

"What time do you want leave home this afternoon?" she asked Anna.

"Leave home for what?"

"Thomas's band playing tonight. Didn't he tell you about it?"

"No." Anna felt embarrassed. "I guess he knows that I don't really go out" she said quickly.

"You should totally come" Isabella urged. "I don't even know anyone who's going."

"Renee and Megan from work normally go."

Isabella made a face. "They don't like me" she said pointedly.

Anna sighed.

"Ok fine, but just for a little bit."

…

After buying the last item on her list, Anna felt tired and wanted to go home. As she crossed the street, she saw Fred and George's shop Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. She felt nervous but as she had already met them, she decided to stop by and say hello to them. When she entered, she saw Fred immediately and gave him a small wave.

"Hi there, Miss" he said, grinning as he approached Anna. "Welcome to Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes! Can I interest you in sample of our Otters Fizzy Orange Juice?"

She was not sure if he was pretending that he did not recognise her; he was after all renowned for his pranks. She laughed nervously.

He only responded by looking at her expectedly.

_He didn't recognise her._

"Oh, um, no thanks" replied Anna, feeling embarrassed now for the second time that morning. "I'm Anna, Ron and Ginny's friend?"

"Oh!" exclaimed Fred, he looked sheepish. "Of course! What are you doing in Diagon Alley?"

"Just getting some stuff" Anna replied vaguely. Not wanting to elaborate on her boring shopping list, she quickly changed the subject. "Your store is really cool."

"Isn't she?" He looked around admiringly. Then - "You're living with Bella now, hey?"

She felt herself deflate. "Yeah."

"She's not too much of a princess?" he asked, smirking.

"Not really."

Anna could sense herself becoming detached and knew she had to leave. "I'm really sorry, but I should get going – It was nice seeing you, Fred."

"Likewise."

…

Anna was happy to be home. She felt emotionally and mentally drained from her morning, and wanted to rest before Thomas's performance. She was about to close her eyes when Isabella burst through her bedroom door.

"Which one?" She wore a red dress, before twirling and transforming it in to a light shade of blue.

"Definitely red" said Anna. "It's your colour."

Isabella crawled on to the bed. "What are you wearing?" she asked, getting under the bed cover.

"This.." Anna lifted her side of the bed cover, so her outfit – what she wore to Diagon Alley – was visible. Isabella made a face. "Don't start" she warned and closed her eyes.

They had overslept, which thankfully meant that Isabella was in too much of a rush getting ready herself to complain about Anna's outfit again. When they arrived at the club, they looked for a spot near the stage.

"So, what does Thomas do in the band?" asked Isabella.

Anna looked at her, confused. "Hasn't he told you?"

"Yeah, I think once, but I must have been daydreaming or something."

"Oh, well he's the lead singer. He's really good" gushed Anna. Isabella raised her eyebrows at her but said nothing. Thomas appeared on the stage then and Anna immediately waved at him. He crouched down to meet their level.

"Well, well, well, Miss Lindsay – I never thought I'd ever get you to come to one of my gigs" he joked. She blushed. He looked at Isabella. "You're doing, I presume?" Isabella opened her mouth to respond but the announcer called him backstage. His band _Hole Punch_ played their set, and even Anna, who got nervous in large crowds, enjoyed herself. After his performance, Thomas signalled for Anna and Isabella to meet him backstage.

"That was great!" exclaimed Anna.

"Thanks Annie" He smiled at her. "A bunch of us are going out later, if you wanted to come?" he asked, though he was mainly looking at Isabella. Anna felt her stomach sink.

"I don't know" said Isabella, and she looked at Anna. "Do you want to go?"

"I'll probably just head home, but you should go if you want."

"Nah, I think I'm coming down with something to be honest." Isabella looked at Thomas apologetically. "Raincheck?"

"Sure."

Anna and Isabella apparated home, and Anna quickly went to the bathroom to find cold medicine to give to Isabella while she was still in the lounge room.

"What's this?" she asked, inspecting the small box.

"Cold medicine – I'll just get you some water." Anna was about to move but Isabella grabbed her arm.

"I'm not sick" she laughed. "It was just an excuse to not go out."

"Oh."

Anna sat down on the sofa opposite of Isabella, she opened her mouth to ask why but Isabella spoke first.

"You like him, don't you?"

"Who?"

"Thomas" said Isabella. She gave Anna a knowing look. "It's pretty obvious – well, to everyone but him, anyway." Anna didn't say anything. "I'm not interested in him, by the way."

"You're not?"

"Nope" said Isabella simply. "And I'm being serious. Sisters before misters." She jumped on to the sofa Anna was sitting on and they both burst out laughing.

They stayed up until the early hours of the morning, talking and laughing, and Anna felt silly that she had ever felt envious of Isabella.


	20. Chapter 20

Anna 

"I knew it!" Isabella exclaimed triumphantly. "I told you there was something going on with Snape and Swan. They always had this weird sexual tension whenever I saw them together – oh, grow up" she added, seeing the equal looks of horror on her friends.

It was a warm day, and Anna, Isabella, Ginny, Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Fred and George had decided to go to the lake near the Burrow to have a swim. Anna felt too embarrassed to be seen in a bathing suit and opted to sit in the shade and read.

"Anna, come on!" called Ginny from the water. She splashed Ron, who glared at her. "The water's so nice!" Anna pretended not to hear her and kept reading. Isabella got out of the water and at first dried herself with a towel but then ran over to Anna and shook herself like a wet dog.

"So I was thinking about having a party on Saturday" she said, ignoring Anna's glare directed at her. "We'll invite these guys and everyone from work?"

"Do _I_ have to go?"

She narrowed her eyes. "Obviously. Besides, Thomas will be there."

"And?"

"_And_, it's a perfect opportunity for him to fall in love with you!"

"Oh yeah, because that'll just happen" scoffed Anna. She rolled her eyes before turning her attention back to her book.

"Well, I was thinking…maybe I can give you a makeover?" said Isabella hopefully.

"Absolutely not" replied Anna, without looking up.

"What are you two conspiring about?"

She looked up and saw Fred making his way over to her and Isabella.

"Nothing" they said in unison. He raised his eyebrows.

"Actually, we're going to have a party this weekend" said Isabella, and she ignored the filthy look Anna was giving her again. "You better be there."

"Sure." He looked at Anna momentarily, before quickly snatching her book out of her hands. "_Great Expectations_" he read aloud.

"You're going to wet the pages!" cried Anna. She went to grab the book back, but Fred stood up and held it above his head. He was at least a foot taller than her. Anna whipped out her wand and with one quick wave, Fred was rolling on the grass laughing.

"Tickling hex, _nice_" commented Isabella. Anna waved her wand again and her book was back in her hands. She inspected it casually before letting Fred go.

Severus 

Severus was relieved to find that Amaryllis did not care much for dates, and while they had been spending most of their time together, thankfully none of that time was spent on generic couple activities. Amaryllis was still a student at heart and she often showed a desire to learn from him, especially in potions and the dark arts. In turn, she educated him with her knowledge of the Muggle world. Finally, after some time, Severus felt comfortable enough to invite her to his home on Spinner's End.

"Well, this is…quaint" she commented, as she looked around the lounge room. "Very you."

"Thank you" said Severus sarcastically.

"Hey, that was a compliment, Sev."

Unfortunately for him, Amaryllis saw the look of discomfort on his face before he quickly changed his expression. "What? You don't like 'Sev'? But I always hear Li –" Realisation dawned on her. "Oh."

They were both silent in that moment, then -

"Oh my God!" she exclaimed suddenly, and he almost flinched in surprise. "What about _Mount Sev-erest?_" He glared at her, but it didn't deter Amaryllis. "Come on, if I can't call you 'Sev', then at least let me have this!"

"Why can't you just call me 'Severus'?" he groaned. "I call you 'Amaryllis'."

"That's because you're _boring_."

She stood on her toes and gave Severus a kiss on the cheek, and then grabbed his hand and twirled herself. When she extended his arm again, he noticed that her eyes followed not his face, but his arm. The Dark Mark. It was still on Severus's wrist, and now it was visible for her to see. Ashamed, he let go of her hand and pulled his sleeve over the Mark so it could be hidden, but she took his arm again and kissed the back of his hand.

"Huh, I wonder if I can…" she murmured.

Amaryllis pulled Severus on to the sofa and turned his wrist over, so the Mark was visible again. She then closed her eyes and put her hands over the Mark. Severus watched as white light emerged from her hands. After five minutes, he saw that the Mark looked slightly less pigmented, but Amaryllis was sickly pale. With his free hand, he gently took her hands off his wrist and stopped the healing process. He then lightly placed Amaryllis's head down on to the sofa cushion and let her rest.


	21. Chapter 21

Severus 

"Are you sure you want to come?" Amaryllis looked in the mirror and applied a dark burgundy colour to her lips. Her friend Elissa had invited the two of them for dinner, along with her and Amaryllis's other friends.

Severus leaned against the wall next to her vanity. "Yes" he sighed. "If _you_ don't want me to come, just say so"

She turned to him quickly.

"Of course not, Severus! I want you to come" she said hastily. "It's just that…I know you don't like to socialise much. I don't want to force you."

"It's fine."

Amaryllis took Severus's hands and pulled him closer to her and stood on her toes so she could lightly kiss his hooked nose. When she stood back down, she smiled, and the golden-brown of her eyes glimmered towards his black. Severus fiercely pulled her close to him again and kissed her deeply, feeling almost animalistic with her, as she was fragile in his arms. He felt her hands pull at his coat and at once he cold recall what Sirius had advised him. With all his strength, he pulled away from her, and took a step back. Amaryllis looked at him with confusion; the area around her lips were smeared with the burgundy colour.

"What?" she asked breathlessly. She took a step forward, but he turned around.

"It's almost time to go" he said with his back to her.

Amaryllis walked around him so that she could face him again. "Did I do something wrong?" she asked.

"No."

"Then?"

Severus remained silent.

"Look, I know I'm not the best kisser, but –"

"Absolutely not" said Severus at once, and before Amaryllis could finish her sentence. "You are _more _than adequate." He hesitated. "Black – he told me that you are…inexperienced."

"Oh, you mean that I'm a virgin?" she scoffed. She let out a frustrated breath when Severus made no response. "You know that I'm an adult woman, right? – Tonks is literally the same age as me and she has a _child_, so contrary to what you and Sirius think, I can actually make decisions and judgments pretty well on my own."

"Clearly not" scoffed Severus. He touched her chin and showed her the burgundy colour.

Amaryllis narrowed her eyes at him before retreating into the bathroom. When she came back, she brought a towel and wiped the bottom part of his face.

"Speak for yourself" she said, showing him the burgundy blemished towel.

….

Much to Severus's relief, there were only a handful of people at dinner. They were dressed very casually, and Severus was thankful that Amaryllis had advised him to leave his cape at home.

He was introduced to Elissa and her husband Jacob, and another couple; Stu and Jimmy. Severus had never met a same sex partnership before. Truthfully, he had barely any exposure to anything outside of the heterosexual spectrum – aside from the odd, ill-mannered quips by his drunk father. He, of course, did not share the same opinion of his father, as he did with virtually every opinion of Tobias Snape's. His thoughts wandered to the Wizarding World – it was quite _reserved_. Perhaps there were many who fell on to the same spectrum as Stu and Jimmy, though, felt restricted by the narrow-mindedness of the elders; some wizards and witches after all could live far beyond 150 years. But the atmosphere in the present dining room felt free and natural, no person paying special attention to Stu and Jimmy's movements as they put their arm around each other and called each other names of an affectionate nature. Severus thought about Amaryllis; she carried herself with an unphased, sensitive and accepting nature and, now, meeting her friends, he understood why.

She nudged him lightly with her elbow, and jerked her head to Elissa, who was looking at Severus with a large grin on her face.

"I was just saying that I can't believe I'm meeting you, Severus!" she exclaimed. "Amaryllis has been_ pining_ over you for months."

"I – _absolutely_ – was – not" spluttered Amaryllis, as the others burst out laughing. Severus noticed that she was tapping her foot underneath her chair.

"How did you meet?" Jimmy asked interestedly.

"At school" Elissa answered quickly, before Severus or Amaryllis could even open their mouth. "They _work_ together."

"Well this is the first time we've ever met a _boyfriend_" said Stu.

Amaryllis, who had just put her wine glass to her lips, spat the contents immediately and coughed dramatically, all while shooting daggers in the direction of Stu. Severus was amused.

"Fine, I mean _partner_" Stu corrected himself.

"Give her a break" laughed Jacob. He stood up and poured more wine in her glass.

At the very moment, the doorbell rang and Severus noticed that Jacob's smile instantly slid off his face and he quickly looked at Elissa, who in turn looked quite alarmed. He left the table quickly and came back into the dining room with a new guest. Severus felt Amaryllis tense next to him, and her foot tapped faster.

"Oh, hey Brodie" said Jimmy. He and Stu stood up, somewhat awkwardly, and shook Brodie's hand in turn. Brodie looked at Severus curiously.

"Didn't think you'd make it tonight" said Elissa, her tone was strained.

"Yeah, knocked off work pretty early." He took a seat on the end of the table next to Jacob. Severus noticed that Brodie's eyes jumped back and forth between himself and Amaryllis.

"How was work?" asked Amaryllis. Her voice sounded smaller than usual. Brodie shrugged in response.

There was not much small talk or joking after that. The atmosphere in the room became painfully uncomfortable, even for Severus.

Finally, when everybody was ready to leave and Amaryllis, Stu and Jimmy all thanked Elissa and Jacob for dinner, Brodie disappeared without a word.

"Don't mind him" said Stu. He lowered his voice so that the others could not hear. "Brodie's liked Milly for years…he's just jealous."

Severus did not comment; having felt that way for years with Lily and James, he understood.

….

When they arrived back at Amaryllis's home, she took off her shoes and collapsed on to the couch. "Thank God that's over" she said. Severus grunted in response; he was in an irritable mood now. He stood next to the coffee table with his arms crossed firmly.

"I don't know why Brodie came" she said grimly. "Elissa said he wouldn't be there, but I had a feeling…anyway." She shrugged, and then stood up and walked around the table to be near Severus. She tried to uncross his arms, but he kept his arms crossed even firmer. "What's wrong?"

"He has feelings for you."

"Yeah, but I don't have feelings for him" said Amaryllis gently. "You're the one I want to be with."

"What don't you like about him?".

"What do you mean?" She was frowning now. "He's a great guy."

"Obviously not if you're not attracted to him."

"No…I'm just not attracted to him, Severus. There's no reason for it. It just _is_."

"But he has feelings for you."

Amaryllis looked at him curiously. "I'm confused – are you getting mad at _me_ because I _don't_ have feelings for him?"

"He's known you for a long time" said Severus.

This only seemed to frustrate her.

"And, so what?" she cried. "Just because someone has feelings for me, I _owe_ them feelings in return?" He did not respond. "Look, I get where this is going."

"Where what is going?" asked Severus, feigning ignorance.

"You're upset with me because I don't have feelings for Brodie, the same way Lily didn't have feelings for you" said Amaryllis bluntly. Then her expression softened. "Severus, you can't force someone to like you. When I thought you were uninterested, I didn't press you about it – sure, I was bummed – but I wasn't about to try and change your mind, I accepted it."

"But you and I are together _now_" Severus pointed out.

She looked at him evenly then. "Severus be honest with me. Do you really think you're ready to be in a relationship with me right now?"

"I do have feelings for you."

"I know you do" she said. "And I understand your love for Lily, but you getting triggered like this and taking it out on me…you know it's not right, don't you?"

"It is difficult to let certain things go" Severus confessed. "I have loved Lily for a long time."

"Then maybe we should take a break for now" she suggested; her voice sad but steady.

Another man would have rejected the idea immediately. He would have fought for Amaryllis until she took back her words.

But he was Severus Snape, and unfortunately it was _not_ in his nature to do things like this.

Instead, he agreed with her.


	22. Chapter 22

Anna 

"Why are we cleaning? The house isn't even dirty" whined Isabella. She dramatically flopped on to the sofa.

"_You're_ the one who wanted to have the party" Anna pointed out. "Cleaning is part of the process."

"I guess I always had house elves to do that part for me." She shrugged. "What do we have left to do after this?"

"Just food."

"_And brews_" Isabella said, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

Anna sighed. "Only a little bit. It's really expensive" she warned.

"Leave that to me."

Working together, they finished cleaning by midday, and afterwards Anna rested on her bed while Isabella raided Anna's closet to find her something to wear.

"Oh God, there's like fifty shades of beige in here…" She closed the drawer and turned around, a wicked smile on her face.

"What?" asked Anna suspiciously.

"Let's go SHOPPING!" Isabella exclaimed, and she jumped on the bed in excitement. Anna wrinkled her nose. "Oh, come on, we literally just got paid last night!"

"Yeah, and we should be saving it!"

"Anna, it' one outfit. You're being such a party pooper" Isabella whined. Anna sighed. "Yes!"

"Hey, that wasn't a yes!" But Isabella had already jumped up and grabbed Anna's hand.

"Let's _goooooo_."

"Fine. But only if we go to a thrift store" Anna said firmly.

"What's that?"

"It's a shop where you can buy second-hand clothing for really cheap." Isabella made a face. "It's all hygienic" Anna assured her.

"Whatever – let's go" she replied absentmindedly.

When they reached the thrift store, Isabella gushed over every item of clothing she saw.

"How cute is this!" She took a navy-blue dress out of its hanger and held it against her frame. "And it's only £10!"

After a strenuous two hours of convincing her not to spend her entire pay check, Anna finally dragged Isabella out of the store – though, she felt pleased to see that Isabella enjoyed something that she suggested. As soon as they got home after buying groceries, they both collapsed on the couch and fell asleep almost instantly.

….

Anna woke up first. Looking at her watch, she jumped up instantly and shook Isabella awake.

"It's almost 5pm!" she hissed.

"We've still got another hour" Isabella said groggily when she looked at her own watch.

"We haven't made any food yet!"

Frustrated, Anna left Isabella and headed straight to the kitchen, where she immediately started putting trays in the oven. After half an hour, things were finally prepared enough for her to change her clothes. When she entered her bedroom, Isabella was sitting on her bed with a devilish grin.

"Whatever it is, the answer is no."

"Can I please, _please_ do your hair and makeup?" begged Isabella. Anna groaned. There was not enough time to be fighting Isabella now.

"Ok" she said reluctantly. Isabella squealed and pulled her into her bedroom.

"Have you ever put makeup on before?" She seemed to be intensely focused on applying blusher to Anna's cheek. "Anna, stop making that face" she scolded.

"No. I don't really put anything on my face, it aggravates my acne." Her eyes began to water from the mascara that had applied on her earlier.

"Just make sure to take it off before you go to bed."

Anna looked in the mirror and almost did not recognise herself. Isabella had curled her hair into loose waves and the makeup she applied, enhanced Anna's natural features. She wore a dark plaid skirt, with a white knitted, long sleeved top and sheer stockings – the skirt she bought from the thrift store.

"If Thomas doesn't notice you tonight, he's crazy."

The guests began to arrive, and Anna felt more nervous than ever. She had never dressed up this much for anything, not even for the Valentine's Day Ball. She caught sight of Thomas in the doorway and waved to him. He did a doubletake when he saw her.

"Wait – Anna, is that you?" He squinted his eyes dramatically to look at her more closely. She laughed, though on the inside she was panicking.

"Isabella did this to me."

"Well, she did an excellent job. You look really pretty" said Thomas sincerely. She blushed. "Where is Isabella anyway?"

Then Anna deflated.

"Oh, um – I don't know. Maybe try the kitchen?" she suggested, and she tried very hard not to let disappointment show in her voice. Thomas walked off in the direction of the kitchen, while Anna remained at the doorway.

"Is this where the party is?"

It was Fred.

"Nice to meet you" he said, extending his hand to her. She felt hurt at first, but quickly saw a smile twitching its way on to Fred's face. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Ha ha, very funny" she said sarcastically.

"To be fair, I almost didn't recognise you" he said, grinning at her. "You look different."

"Different good or different bad?" asked Anna.

"Just different" he replied. "Oh! I got you a housewarming gift – just don't mention it to Bells, I forgot to get her something." From his coat pocket, Fred pulled out a book and gave it to Anna. She gasped when she saw the title.

"_Memoirs of a Geisha_! I've been wanting to get this for ages!" she exclaimed, and she hugged the book tightly against her chest. "It's on the best seller's list!"

"That's what the shopkeeper said as well" said Fred, laughing at Anna's reaction. She blushed. "I have no idea about Muggle books, but he was pretty helpful."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

She was about to ask him what book shop he went to but remembered the trays in the oven; she had forgotten to take them out. Her eyes widened in panic, and she quickly ran to the kitchen. She could smell the scent of burnt food and there was steam billowing from the oven. Without thinking, Anna opened the oven door and immediately felt the heat on her face. She took a step back in shock before a hand pulled her away from the heat.

"Watch out" she heard Thomas say. She felt a hand on her shoulder and opened her eyes to his concerned face. Behind him was Fred, who shared the same expression. "You Ok, Annie?"

"Yeah, I'm fine" mumbled Anna, she was embarrassed now. Thomas went to the fridge and pulled out a packet of peas from the freezer and he wrapped it in a tea towel and held it against Anna's face. She felt butterflies in her stomach seeing him care for her this way. "It's honestly fine…my makeup's probably the only thing that's suffered." She touched her face and her embarrassment doubled; it was oily.

"Just making sure" he said. He turned to Fred then. "Keep an eye on her?"

"Yeah sure" He smiled widely at Thomas, but when Thomas turned back to Anna, Fred's smile slid off his face.

"Be careful, hey." Thomas tapped Anna's head gently and left the kitchen.

"Wow, can you believe he just saved your life?" Fred said sarcastically. He whipped out his wand and a wave of cool air hit her face.

"Fred!" she hissed. "There are Muggles here!"

He shrugged.

"Hope my brother's not annoying you."

George Weasley walked into the kitchen then; he was holding hands with a beautiful girl with a deep complexion.

"Well not too much anyway" said the girl. She looked amused.

"Anna almost died" Fred informed them solemnly.

Anna rolled her eyes. "Oh, shut up" she said dryly.

The girl laughed. "At least she can handle you." She smirked at Fred. "I'm Angelina, by the way" she added, looking at Anna.

"Anna."

"So I heard there was going to be alcohol here?" asked George suddenly, looking hopeful. Angelina glared at him.

"No. No alcohol tonight. You have work tomorrow" she disapproved.

"I have work _every _day, Ange" he countered, but her glare only intensified. "Ok fine."

"Let's go find the others" she said sweetly and pulled George's hand out of the kitchen. As they left, Fred made a whipping noise.

"She seems nice" commented Anna. She quickly looked around and waved her hand; the burnt food on the trays transformed to a perfect cook.

"Anna, _there are Muggles here!_" exclaimed Fred, and he put his hand over his mouth dramatically. She laughed.

There was a loud cheer outside the kitchen.

"Sounds like they're starting the shots" sighed Anna. "You're not going to join in?"

"Nah, it's a lot more fun watching you fret about." He laughed when she glared at him. "Why aren't you out there?"

"I'm more of a 'behind the scenes' type of person" said Anna. She put the peas back into the freezer. "Besides, the party is more for Isabella. She's had a pretty crappy year."

"Do you normally do things for everyone else?" asked Fred. His tone was not judgmental.

"I see it more as being a good friend" she replied.

"And what do you do for yourself, huh?"

Anna hesitated. The answer was obvious to her: writing, but she always thought it made her sound lame. "I like to write" she answered, deciding to tell the truth; it was far easier than feigning interest in something she did not love. She waited for his response, half expecting him to be unimpressed.

"Oh, so now you're this great writer?" he asked grandly.

She laughed, relieved mostly. "I wouldn't say '_great_' – but I do enjoy it. It's like I get to be this whole other person, you know?"

"And that is?"

"Someone who has all the qualities I wish I had" she said quietly.

"And you don't think you have those qualities now?" asked Fred

"I don't think so."


	23. Chapter 23

Isabella 

"I don't know, Bells" said Anna warily. She wrinkled her nose at a pair of stockings before putting it in the washing machine. "Do you think that Dumbledore would even allow it?"

"I guess I won't know until I ask" grumbled Isabella. She knew that Anna was trying to look out for her, but she was hoping for a more positive response.

The prospect of the future had created a pit of fear in Isabella's stomach and in true desperation, she decided that she would apply for an assistant teaching position at Hogwarts. Of course, she knew there was a high possibility that she would be rejected, but with everything going on in the world right now, anything was possible. In the evening, she and Anna would be going to Harry's birthday party, and she hoped to talk to Dumbledore directly about it, as he would also be in attendance

"What class would you want to be an assistant in?" asked Anna.

Isabella looked sheepishly at her hands; she had not thought that far. Sure, she had gotten good grades exiting Hogwarts, but there was no class that she felt that she had excelled more in than others. "Hmm, maybe Potions – or Defence?"

Anna seemed to be amused at that answer. "So you wouldn't mind spending the entire day with Slughorn or Snape?"

"I honestly don't understand everyone's problem with Slughorn." Truthfully, Isabella had grown quite fond of the Potions Master.

"And what about Snape?"

She shrugged. "He couldn't be as bad as _my parents_."

….

Isabella was amused to see Fred eagerly greet Anna when they arrived to the Potter's new home, and watched the two disappear immediately in the crowd. Already feeling nervous, she weaved her way through the sea of guests, awkwardly rushing her greetings to those who knew her. Finally, she saw Dumbledore; he was in the company of Snape and McGonagall. It being the perfect opportunity, she took a deep breath and proceeded in their direction. Dumbledore smiled kindly at her when she neared them.

"Professor Dumbledore – Hi, uh, could I please speak with you?" she asked, berating herself for the lack of confidence in her voice. "Actually, all three of you" she added, looking at Snape and McGonagall. They looked at Dumbledore, who nodded in acceptance. Isabella led them to the closest room and closed the door. She could hear her heart pounding.

"I know this is going to sound crazy" she began uncertainly. "But I was hoping that – I mean _if_, I could get a job at Hogwarts?" In her head, prior to leaving home, Isabella had prepared an entire dialogue to convince the Headmaster but the situation was more intimidating in real life, and only a few of those words left her mouth. She looked at Snape and McGonagall, who both looked at her as if she had just asked to crack an egg on their heads. McGonagall spoke first.

"Isabella, we do not take students who have just graduated –"

"Please make an exception for me. I _promise_ I'll do good."

"Unfortunately –"

"_Please_."

"I'm sorry" McGonagall said with finality, and Isabella felt hot tears form in her eyes, and her ears burned from embarrassment.

"Please." She looked straight at Dumbledore as she spoke. "You don't understand. I'm scared, and I feel alone. I have for a long time, especially now my parents are in Azkaban. They never prepared me – and I don't know if someone's after me now. I know I have to face the world one day, but I can't right now. I'm not ready. So please, just give me a job, any job – I'll clean the floors with a toothbrush if I have to!"

She looked away from Dumbledore then, and, to her intense embarrassment, accidentally glanced at Snape and McGonagall, whose expressions of distaste had vanished. The Headmaster cleared his throat.

"Very well, Isabella" he said. "For this year, _just_ this year, you may join the Hogwarts staff. _But_ you will do so by assisting Severus in his first to third year classes of Defence Against the Dark Arts."

Isabella felt her heart soar.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" she sang, jumping on the spot, and without thinking, she hugged him. She quickly let go and regained her composure, blushing. "I mean, thank you – I won't let you down." Standing next to Dumbledore, McGonagall looked amused, while Snape's expression had quickly turned sour. Isabella swiftly exited the room, hoping to find Anna and Ginny to tell them the good news.

As she took a step into the crowd, she heard a glass tinkle behind her. She turned around to see Dumbledore and felt her stomach sink; he was going to make an announcement. The chatter in the room died down and everybody's attention had turned to him.

"We are gathered here tonight to celebrate the birthday of Harry Potter, the bravest of us all. To him, I wish the very happiest of days today, tomorrow and for the rest of his life." Dumbledore's words were met with a round of applause and cheer. Isabella looked at Harry and stifled her laughter when she saw how mortified he looked. He raised his hand to indicate that he would be speaking again and the applause quietened down into silence. "We have another reason to celebrate tonight, it seems." Isabella closed her eyes in embarrassment. "I am pleased to announce that Isabella Parish will be joining our esteemed teaching staff at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry this year, as the assistant to our very own Defence Against the Dark Art's professor Severus Snape!"

The announcement was met with no applause, and when Isabella opened her eyes, the guests shared equal looks of confusion and surprise. And while nowhere in sight, she was sure Mrs Weasley was tut-tutting her disapproval somewhere in the crowd. Suddenly, a loud clap started. She turned to where the sound came from and felt her heart soar for the second time that night when she saw Sirius. She smiled gratefully at him. Eventually others started to clap as well, ending the silence. Isabella looked over to where her friends were standing and smiled grimly at them; she avoided making eye contact with Ginny, feeling guilty that she had not had a chance to speak to her before the announcement. As chatter began again, she walked tentatively towards them. Ginny grabbed Harry's hand and walked off.

"Congratulations Bella" said Hermione. She was smiling, though it looked forced. She hugged Isabella weakly.

"It's only because I begged Dumbledore" she said quickly. "Trust me, I'm sure Snape would have taken you as an assistant over me any day if he had the choice." It was of course a lie. If Snape _did_ have the choice, she was sure he would rather eat a whole bag of dung flavoured Bertie Bott's than have _any_ past student of his as an assistant. Hermione's face brightened however, much to Isabella's relief. She felt a tap on her shoulder and turned around to a wide smiling Sirius.

"Congratulations Isabella!" he exclaimed happily. "Finally, someone as young as me on the staff table – ow! Just joking, Milly!" Amaryllis Swan, who was standing in a group behind him, dug her elbow in to his back.

Isabella laughed.

"Thanks Sirius! I can't wait to start" she said brightly. "Would you happen to know where Ginny is?" She wished she could have spoken to him more, but she had to find her friend.

"I think I saw her go outside." Sirius then turned around and joined Amaryllis's group, putting his arm around her shoulders. Isabella noticed that Snape watched him with disdain.

She quickly made her way towards the front door, hoping nobody would stop to congratulate her. As she went to take a step outside the door, she saw Ginny and Harry walking towards her. They faced each other.

"I – uh, am going to go find Ron" Harry said awkwardly. He swiftly hastily the house, leaving Isabella and Ginny alone. Ginny's arms were firmly crossed.

"No congratulations?" joked Isabella nervously.

"You know, you could have given me a head's up before it was announced." Ginny's voice was low.

"I know. And I wanted to. Unfortunately, Dumbledore got to you before I did."

"You know hiding at Hogwarts isn't going to make anything better for you when you leave, right?"

Isabella sighed. "Trust me, _I know_…I just need some more time to figure everything out" she said. "Are you mad at me?"

"I was" said Ginny, and a smile was fighting its way on to her face now. "But I guess I can't be anymore…seeing as you'll probably be grading my papers."

Isabella had to laugh at that.


	24. Chapter 24

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis ran as fast as she could to the staff room hoping she would not be late. When she turned in to the corridor, she saw Isabella hovering near the door.

"No one in there yet?" she asked breathlessly.

"Nah, I think we're early" replied Isabella. "Are you Ok, Professor Swan?"

"_Amaryllis_ – and yes, just haven't ran that fast in a while – I'm out of shape."

Isabella laughed. "I guess us wizards don't run enough, huh?"

"I guess not" replied Amaryllis. She smiled at the young witch. "How are you settling in? Must be weird going from student to teacher in a matter of weeks."

"Definitely" she groaned. "Feels like I'm still a student to be completely honest."

"I'm sure it does. But trust me, it'll all feel natural soon enough."

"I hope so" sighed Isabella. "I'm dreading seeing Snape already. I'm sure he's cursing my name as we sp –" She looked over Amaryllis's shoulder and suddenly cleared her throat loudly as if to say '_He's coming!_'

In the short silence that followed, Amaryllis listened to the familiar stride of Severus's boots before it reached a halt next to her. His coat brushed against her bare arm, instantly taking her back to their time together in the school break, the closeness they shared, right before the dreaded night of Elissa's dinner party…

She was brought back to reality when Isabella began to speak.

"Looking forward to our classes together, Professor?" she asked, casually leaning against the door. Severus said nothing for a moment. _Probably cursing her name_, Amaryllis thought in amusement.

"Dumbledore is enforcing it" he replied finally. And then he cleared his throat. "You may call me 'Severus' outside of our classes."

"Sure thing _Severus_" said Isabella, drawing out his name like a first-year student in Charms class. Without looking at him, Amaryllis was sure that he looked scathingly at Isabella; she stifled a laugh.

"Oi!" Sirius was panting by the time he jogged up to the group of three. "I thought I was going to be late."

"I think all our watches are wrong or something" said Isabella, she smiled brightly at him.

With Sirius joining them now Amaryllis could look directly at Severus; she gave him a shy smile and watched his expression soften.

The days leading up to school she busied herself with reading, cleaning, and seeing Sirius and Charlie whenever she could – anything that would not let her mind wander to Severus. But now she would have to see him every day. What was she supposed to say to him? What would they talk about now? They had long left the world of colleagueship far behind when they tested the dangerous waters of something more. Its existence and failure plagued her mind with different emotions surrounding him now; awkwardness, sadness, disappointment, hurt, and even in tiny part, resent. But most of all, she felt insecure, that perhaps, unlike her own, Severus's feelings for her had disappeared.

Thankfully, Minerva came then and quickly shooed everyone away from the doorway and into the staff room. Amaryllis sat in her normal seat next to Severus, while Sirius offered his seat, next to her, to Isabella and sat on her other side. Shortly, Albus and the other members of staff arrived, and after the Headmaster's announcements, the room was filled with chatter. Amaryllis turned to Severus, with finally enough courage to talk to him.

"How was the rest your break, Severus?" she asked him tentatively.

"What are you talking about?" Isabella broke in before he could answer. She looked from Amaryllis to Severus in confusion – then: "Have you two broken up?"

She must have spoken loudly, for the whole room fell silent. Amaryllis hastily looked at her hands.

"_I knew they were together_" she heard Sybill Trelawney whisper from the other side of the room.

Isabella 

If Isabella thought that teaching Defence Against the Dark Arts would be fun, she was dead wrong. As a student, she enjoyed the class greatly – but teaching was different. It was boring and repetitive – well, at least it was in Severus Snape's class. She had to commend him though for teaching as long as he had, especially considering the clear disdain he had for the students.

"Mr Sparrow, if you and Mr Heathen continue your conversation, you will both have detention" he snapped. The two second year Ravenclaw boys quickly straightened up in their seats. "Now, open your textbooks to page 193."

The rest of the morning went painfully slow. Severus's teaching plan was strict and ordered, with more lecture than discussion. She perked up, however, in third period, when fourth year Slytherin and Gryffindor students were taught how to produce the Patronus Charm. The room was quickly filled with silvery wisps, with some taking the form of animals, and others remaining shapeless. One Gryffindor student in particular – Ed Humphries, a small boy with blonde hair covering his eyes - had his Patronus take the form of a sloth.

The excitement and wonder ended soon enough though, and the students took their seats again. Severus expected a written essay submitted to him by the end of class, with each student describing their Patronus. They wrote in silence. Then suddenly, to Isabella's complete and utter embarrassment, her stomach growled loudly. She heard the students snigger around the classroom. From his desk, Severus glared at her.

Finally, it was lunch time and it took every ounce of her will power not to run out of classroom before the students. Instead, she waited until they all left and approached Severus's desk; he sorted the student papers with a look of contempt.

"Anything for me to do, Professor?"

"_Severus" _he corrected, without looking up. "And no. You may go to lunch."

"Cool."

She turned to leave, but quickly whipped back around. "Oh, uh – do I sit at the staff table?" Severus looked at her with an expression that clearly indicated that she had just asked a very stupid question.

"Obviously."

…..

Isabella walked past the Gryffindor table and saw Ginny and Luna sitting together. Ginny smirked at her.

"Straighten up your posture Miss Weasley, or that'll be 10 points from Gryffindor" threatened Isabella jokingly. Ginny rolled her eyes. She quickly looked around, before giving Isabella the bird.

Knowing that there was an order that the staff usually sat in, Isabella awkwardly approached the staff table. Sirius and Amaryllis sat next to each other already eating their lunch. Thankfully, he motioned for her to sit on his other side.

"It's alright Bella" he said, as she sat down next to him. "I asked Flitwick this morning if you could sit here."

"Thanks Sirius." She felt warmth at his use of the name 'Bella'.

"How was your first class?" asked Amaryllis interestedly. Sirius sat back further on his seat, so that the two women could see and hear each other better while he was in between them.

"Bor-ing" answered Isabella, drawing her syllables out. "Hearing Sn – _Severus's_ voice three classes in a row could put even Binns to sleep – I'm lucky I even made it past the second class!" Sirius roared with laughter. Amaryllis however looked saddened. "But he is a good teacher" Isabella added quickly, raising her voice to speak over Sirius's laughter. "Most of the students got their Charms to work on their first try." Amaryllis brightened. Severus arrived at the staff table then, he sat down on his usual seat.

"How were your classes?" Isabella asked Amaryllis.

"Good!" she replied happily. "My sixth years are learning about technology right now, which I can tell they're_ really_ enjoying. And right before lunch, we played hang-man!"

Isabella realised in that moment, that, contrary to what she believed, teaching was not actually _boring_ – _she_ just was not passionate about it – unlike Amaryllis, who Isabella could easily see had an incredible passion for teaching.

"That's awesome!" Isabella craned her neck to talk to Severus. "I was just saying how _riveting_ our classes were this morning."

"Perhaps you should spend your time _eating_ instead of talking" he sneered. "So that we do not experience another _tremor_ in class again."


	25. Chapter 25

Amaryllis

Amaryllis squealed loudly upon seeing Charlie's letter. He had finally asked the Muggle girl he was interested in on a date; her name was Sarah. Sirius and Isabella looked at her alarmed, but she shook her head, letting them know not to worry.

"What are you guys up this weekend?" asked Isabella. She took a sip from her goblet, but spat out the contents immediately. "_What the Hell?" _she screeched. "I thought this was orange juice!". Quickly grabbing a serviette, she scraped her tongue with it dramatically. "This bloody school and its _obsession_ with pumpkin juice…it's ruined my breakfast!". She then whipped out her wand and tapped the goblet with it. "That's better" she said, after taking a sip. She turned back to Amaryllis and Sirius again. "Sorry, back to my question."

"Nothing really" said Amaryllis, trying not to laugh. "Might go see Charlie later on if he's free." The words slipped out of her mouth before she remembered Severus was sitting next to her. "He's got some news to tell me" she added quickly.

"That's nice" commented Isabella. "What about you?" she asked Sirius.

"Going to James and Lily's house, Moony and Tonks will be there too" he said happily. "You?"

"Probably nothing" she replied. "Anna is at work all day and Ginny has Quidditch practice."

"You should come with me."

"Oh no, that's fine –" Isabella began to say, but Sirius cut across her.

"They'll be happy to see you."

"I don't want to intrude..." She looked at Amaryllis for support.

But it seemed as if Sirius had already made up his mind. "Not at all. Trust me, I'm sure Lily and Tonks would appreciate another female in the house."

"If you're sure…"

"Of course." He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand "Alright, I have a couple of things to do – meet at Dumbledore's office at 10?" She nodded her confirmation.

"That should be fun" said Amaryllis encouragingly when Sirius left the table. "Tonks is really nice, you'd get along with her easily."

"I hope so" said Isabella. "I've heard Lily Potter is really nice too."

At the sound of Lily's name, Amaryllis felt her stomach drop. Lily. The reason why she and Severus wrre not together. Lily. The reason why she and Severus could _never_ be together. She could admit to herself now that she had her doubts with him even when they were together during the break; back then she had pushed those probing thoughts to the back of her mind, the thoughts that screamed to her that Severus was only with her because Lily was married, that he had settled for her. It was piercing, and it was too painful for her to think about for too long.

Amaryllis quickly stood up, she heard herself say few words to Severus and Isabella before walking back to her quarters at a steady pace. Once in the confinement of her bedroom, she let only some tears escape her eyes, before taking out her quill and parchment and scribbling a note to Charlie; she hoped he was free to catch up later in the day.

….

"Sarah seems really nice" said Amaryllis happily. Her mood had instantly lifted with Charlie's presence; they sat together in their usual spot at the Three Broomsticks. "So where are you planning on taking her?"

"Well, she likes live music, so maybe to a club or something?" replied Charlie. "I wrote down some of the bands she's interested in."

"Do you think that maybe it'd be too loud to have your first date at a club? They're pretty loud, I don't know if you'd really get the chance to know her better."

He sighed. "See Milly, this is why I come to you first."

She laughed. "I don't even know why you trust me to be honest, it's not like I know anything about dating.

"You're female and you're reasonable" said Charlie seriously. "So you're probably the best person for it."

"If you say so." Amaryllis shook her head in amusement. "Have you told anyone from your family about her yet?"

Charlie ran his hand through his red hair. "Not yet. If things go well then I'll bring her up later. Don't want to get Mum and Dad too excited. Especially Dad, he would get way too overjoyed at the idea of having an actual Muggle in the family."

"That makes sense."

"I really hope things go well thoug. I know it sounds cliché, but I've liked her from the moment I saw her."

Amaryllis suddenly felt an intense wave of jealousy crash over her. Not because she was jealous of Charlie and Sarah, but because of how easy it was for him to express his feelings about her. It was leaps and bounds away from Severus.

Charlie must have sensed her change of mood. "Sorry, I'm sure this is the last thing you want to hear about" he said apologetically.

"Of course not!" she said quickly, her jealousy now overtaken by guilt. "Seriously, I am happy for you Charlie. You deserve nothing but the best, and I mean that."

"Thanks Milly." He cleared his throat. "So, how's stuff with Snape at school now?"

"Fine" answered Amaryllis automatically. He looked at her doubtfully. "Terrible," she groaned. "I don't even know how to act around him now. Every time I see him, I can't help but think of all our time together over the break. I miss kissing him."

Charlie made a face of disgust. "Sorry" he said quickly. "Old habits. Just hard to forget sometimes that he used to be my Professor – But I do understand what you're saying. Have you spoken to Sirius about it much?"

"Not really" said Amaryllis grimly. "Sirius is an incredible friend, but he _hates_ Severus. I think it spoils his mood when I bring it up." She sighed frustratingly. "I just want Severus to want me back, is that too much to ask?"

"We can make him jealous?" suggested Charlie. "It's not like anyone besides you knows about Sarah."

She laughed. "That's very sweet of you to offer, but Charlie, that never works – also, what if your Mum sees and starts planning our wedding?"

Charlie blanched. "Oh God, she probably would, huh?".

"Exactly."

"So, what's the plan?"

"I just need to get over it" said Amaryllis. "See friends, get to know new people, enjoy my days…as Sirius once so eloquently put it."

Isabella 

Isabella and Sirius apparated to her home and quickly she checked that her room was still intact.

"Looks all good to me" said Sirius, from the doorway.

"You can come in, you know" said Isabella. From the corner of her eye she saw a pair of her underwear hanging on her bed frame, she quickly grabbed it when Sirius wasn't looking and shoved it her dresser drawer. He looked at her with his eyebrows raised.

"Hiding love letters?" he asked.

"Love letters?" repeated Isabella in amusement.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Cut me some slack, Bella. The last time I was in a teenage girl's bedroom was about 20 years ago."

"Excuse me, I'm not a _teenager"_ she said, mock-offended. "I'm an adult now."

"Oh, of course." He rolled his eyes.

….

"Your Mum was kind of my hero growing up" said Isabella, as Sirius filled her goblet to the brim with Firewhiskey.

"You're kidding?" exclaimed Tonks.

"I'm serious!" replied Isabella. "Mum hated her guts for marrying a Muggleborn so of course I had to feel the opposite. I still remember her shrill voice growing up – '_That wicked Andromeda Black, she brought shame on her family!_'"

Tonks roared with laughter. "I'm _definitely_ going to have to tell her that the next time I see her" she said, after sobering up.

"So, how is teaching at Hogwarts?" asked James suddenly. .

"I think he means, how is teaching _with Severus_?" interjected Lily before Isabella could answer. She rolled her eyes at her husband who in return gave her a sheepish grin.

"He's alright" said Isabella truthfully. "I personally never really had a problem with him to begin with. He's quiet, which is good. I never feel like I have to make conversation with him." Her eyes widened. "Did you know he and Amaryllis Swan have broken up?"

"What?" yelped Tonks. "They only just got together!"

"Do you know why?" asked Lily; she looked disheartened.

Isabella's mind instantly recalled Amaryllis's demeanour after she had mentioned Lily at breakfast. "Not at all" she lied. "I'm not really that close with her and obviously Severus hasn't told me anything."

"I think it's great" said Sirius happily. "She can do way better than that slimy –"

"Sirius" warned Lily, but he ignored her.

"– git, that we all know he is" he finished. "So let's stop pretending that –"

"He saved us all?" she replied sharply. "That he sacrificed years of his life to keep Harry alive –"

"He didn't do it for _Harry"_ said Sirius, just as sharply. "He did it because he knew he screwed up –"

"Oh, stop it Siri -"

"I think we can agree to disagree with each other" said Remus loudly, so that his voice silenced them both. "Because of him, Voldemort is defeated, so we should be grateful for his involvement in the war. But in saying that" he continued, when Sirius opened his mouth again. "I also know he was cruel to so many, including myself, which was extremely immature and unbecoming of him. It's a grey area so perhaps it's best that we don't ruin our friendships and relationships over it."

The room fell in to an awkward silence.

"Speaking of relationships" said Tonks. "Sirius, I keep hearing you're this mass womanizer and yet, I haven't seen you with a single woman."

"I'm still in disbelief that you and Amaryllis are just friends" remarked Remus. "Back when were in school, Sirius would have jumped at the prospect of seeing her" he explained to Isabella.

"A girl and a boy can be just friends, you know" said Sirius; he put his nose in the air haughtily.

"_Boy?_" repeated Isabella, narrowing her eyes. "Only this morning you were saying how you haven't seen a teenage girl's bedroom in _20 years." _

James, Lily, Remus and Tonks burst out laughing.

"Do you remember when Griselda Munfront asked you out and you told her you were_ saving yourself_?" howled James, through fits of laughter.

"She always had a runny nose!" exclaimed Sirius. He looked at Isabella. "The Marauders would never have let me live it down, actually, maybe Peter – " He suddenly became quiet and all laughter ceased. Isabella caught Tonks's eye and they exchanged a worried look. Then: "Prongs and Moony would never have let me live it down" he said finally, grinning, though half-heartedly Isabella thought.

"Have you – " she began, but then she closed her mouth, unsure whether to continue. "I don't want you to get mad at me" she said. "...But have you all ever thought about seeing Peter again?"

"Why would we want to do that?" said Sirius at once. His tone was even, though the hostility laced within it was obvious.

"Well, he betrayed you" said Isabella simply. "Not that I have to remind you. Don't you want answers?"

"I got all _my_ answers years ago in the Shrieking Shack" sId Sirius.

She looked at Remus. "Even you?".

"I have nothing more to say to him."

Isabella turned to James and Lily.

"I wouldn't even know what to say to him" said James.

Lily sighed. "He was a good friend, our _best_ friend. But he was the reason James and I didn't get to be a part of Harry's life growing up. I can't forgive him for that."

"I'm not saying anyone has to forgive" clarified Isabella. "But have you thought about getting closure? I mean, it sounds like you all haven't even talked about Peter amongst yourselves. In fact, now thinking back on it, I can't even remember Peter being mentioned in any of your stories."

The room remained silent.

"Look, I get it" she said evenly. "It's the same reason I never confronted my mother about Sam. It's hard to dig up the past, especially when the person who's hurt you so much is someone who's supposed to love you."

Sirius rounded on her at once. "So why haven't you seen your mother then?"

"I don't think she'd be able to give me a proper answer" she replied, ater some thought "I think losing Sam did something to her – like in the head. I have a feeling even if I do ask her, she'd tell me it was because he was a Squib, and to be honest, I'm sure that's what she believes because that's what she's been telling herself for so many years to get through it."

He looked at her grimly and no one else spoke.

Suddenly, Isabella raised her goblet of Firewhiskey. "To terrible friends and family" she toasted. The room instantly exploded in laughter, as the others raised their goblets as well, not allowing their day to be wasted on sadness.


	26. Chapter 26

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis looked grimly at the stack of papers she had left to mark before her next class. It was lunch time now, but she chose to remain in her classroom. As she picked up her quill, she heard a knock and looked up. Albus stood at the entrance of her classroom. She smiled at him as an indication for him to enter.

"Hello Albus." She stood up out of respect. "Not going to lunch?"

"I thought I would take the opportunity to visit you, seeing as you haven't been present in the Great Hall during meal times for the past couple of days." He sat down at one of the student desks.

Amaryllis sighed and sat down again. She considered lying but it seemed pointless now. "I'm trying to avoid Severus" she said truthfully.

"And why is that?"

"You know why."

"Do you think Severus deserves that?"

Her stomach dropped. "No" she confessed.

"Severus is a very complicated man" said Albus.

"I know that."

"Then perhaps it's not impossible to believe that the love he has for Lily is also complicated."

She felt her ears burn with embarrassment; she didn't want to have _this_ conversation with the wizard many considered to be the greatest in the world.

"Perhaps there is a particular ache attached to it" he continued. "Which is why it has remained with him for so long."

"I don't understand."

"Pain and disappointment can feel like home if felt often enough, Amaryllis. Loving Lily and losing Lily is all Severus has known for so long…To feel something outside of that spectrum, is, I think, still completely foreign to him."

Amaryllis said nothing. She understood his words, but it seemed all too impossible to her.

"Have you considered speaking to Lily?"

"No" she said at once. "How embarrassing –"

"Lily is a very kind person."

She scoffed. "That's the point though, isn't it? That she's perfect, she's beautiful…that's why Severus will never get over her" she said bitterly. Immediately, she regretted her words, mortified at her response in front of the Headmaster. But his face had not change in the slightest, in fact, Amaryllis thought, he looked amused.

"Why do you feel so strongly about this?" she asked. "Why does it matter to you whether Severus and I work out?"

"He has grown right in front of eyes" said Albus. "I witnessed so many of his emotions over a span of many, many years, but happiness was never one of them."

….

"Thanks for having me over tonight on such short notice" said Amaryllis.

"I'm glad you and I are finally getting a chance to talk" said Lily. "I think it's been a long time coming."

Amaryllis looked around the Potter's kitchen. "Where's James?"

"Out." She gestured for Amaryllis to sit at the table with her. "So you and Severus broke up." It was not a question.

"Yes – I broke up with him."

"Why?"

"Why do you think?"

"Because of me."

"Yes."

"Did he say that?" asked Lily.

Amaryllis sighed. "Look, to be honest, it doesn't matter if he did or he didn't. The problem is me, my brain in this whole thing – I just can't help but feel that Severus is only available because you're married, that he ruined his chance with you because he called you a mudblood." She spoke her words hastily and hoped Lily understood, so she would not have to repeat herself.

"But James doesn't feel that way" stated Lily.

"What do you mean?"

"James doesn't feel that way" repeated Lily. "Nor do I. I didn't fall in love with James because Severus called me a mudblood" she explained. "I fell in love with James because I just did. Severus calling me a mudblood is just a coincidence to that fact." She paused. "Give yourself some credit, Amaryllis. Like you said, Severus is available, but he has been for a _long_ time. He could have been with anyone in that stretch, and yet, it wasn't until you came in to his life that he actually considered feeling for someone new."

Amaryllis processed Lily's words slowly. "You think I actually have a chance with him."

"I do. But unfortunately, you have to be patient" said Lily. "He's _passionately_ short-tempered – he always has been, but it's only because his relationships have been destructive in the past. Not just with me, but think about his parents, how many problems they had, how much they fought. I think it's _you_ that has to show him, that having problems and fighting, it doesn't mean the end – it can be worked through, just like most things in life, and that is what's going to help him move forward."

Amaryllis closed her eyes, still processing. "You're right" she said, and she opened her eyes again. "And I can't give up on him every time something doesn't go the way I want it to either."

"I think so too."

"Maybe I should have come to you earlier" said Amaryllis sheepishly. "Though, I have to admit, I was really hoping you weren't as nice as everyone says you are."

"So I'm still your Hero?" joked Lily.

She laughed. "Oh God, you remember that?".

"How could I forget?"

"You must have thought I was an idiot."

"No, but it was _so_ obvious that you had a crush on Severus. He was oblivious of course."

Amaryllis grinned at her then. "I hope we can be proper friends now" she said sincerely.

"Me too" said Lily. She smiled, but then her face changed, "Have you had the chance to talk to Sirius lately?" she asked.

"Not really. Why?"

"We got in to it the other day," she said grimly. "The topic was Severus, of course. He can't seem to let go of this enmity between them."

Amaryllis bit her lip. "I think it upsets Sirius that Severus is being hailed as a Hero right now because there was a time when he didn't see the distinction between good and evil – and Sirius _always_ has. But he's not getting the same gratitude."

"And I understand that" said Lily. "I just wish he wouldn't get so worked up every time someone mentions Severus's name."

"If Severus is passionately short-tempered, then so is Sirius" reasoned Amaryllis. "However, I think we misjudge what we see from him as anger, when really it's pain. It's just the way he releases it. And it's built up over the course of almost 20 years. To think that James was the person that Sirius loved most in the world, then he lost him and was imprisoned for his murder. His whole world must have shattered. I think all this pain, it's coming out in bursts of rage and unfortunately for him – and us – our automatic response is to scold him for it. Probably the only time Sirius feels valid is when he sees his psychologist…but I think it's time he gets that support from home too."

Lily sighed. "You're right. And I have to admit, sometimes, when I look at Sirius, I see the boy that I went to Hogwarts with, the bully, and maybe I haven't fully let go of that impression yet."

"I'm not saying Sirius isn't immature" said Amaryllis. "But he went to Azkaban when he was _really_ young, and that's hardly a place to grow. He was never given the same opportunity to mature as everyone else."

"I know. But I can't help myself when I defend Severus – I owe him so much. But I also love Sirius I don't want to keep fighting with him."

"I think the fighting will eventually stop" said Amaryllis. "Remember that he is now armed with James and Remus again, and so many other loved ones that he can be surrounded by and be supported by. Also, he's free now, not couped up in Azkaban, or the attic, or alone with his thoughts…I think we're going to witness a lot of growth in Sirius within the next couple of years. But just like Severus, we have to be patient."

**…..**

Amaryllis woke up early and quickly jumped out of bed. After speaking with Lily the night before, she felt rejuvenated and was ready to talk to Severus again. She put on her favourite burgundy tea dress, curled her hair nicely and put a little more effort in to her makeup. Satisfied with her appearance, she left her quarters, hoping to catch Severus before breakfast. She knocked on the door of his quarters but there was no answer. Slightly disheartened, she decided to go and have breakfast early; she knew she would have more opportunities to speak with Severus throughout the day.

"_Amaryllis_!"

She turned around and saw Isabella running towards her.

"Bloody…Snape" she panted. "Has had me running…around all morning…getting…ready."

"He's in his classroom?"

Isabella put her hand up, indicating that she needed a moment before speaking again. "Yeah, he is" she said finally. "But I wouldn't try and see him now…he's in a really bad mood."

"I think I'll take my chances."

"Your funeral." Without another word, she quickly bound off in the other direction.

At the dungeons; the doors were open, but Severus had his back to her, writing on the blackboard. She cleared her throat. He turned around, initially annoyed, but his expression quickly changed upon seeing her. He gestured for her to enter.

"I saw Isabella before coming here" she said. "She said you're in a bad mood." She stood awkwardly next to the student desk closest to Severus's desk, not wanting to sit down, but also not wanting to be too close to him just yet.

"I'm always in a bad mood."

Amaryllis grinned at him. "That's true." Against her better judgment, she found herself walking towards Severus. When she reached him, they stood only an inch or two apart. "Severus…I just wanted to apologise to you for what happened over the break. All that stuff with Brodie…I should have taken the time to understand what you were feeling. It was really unfair of me to end things abruptly the way I did." She paused. "I don't expect us to get back together but –"

He closed the gap between them and kissed Amaryllis deeply, after what felt like an eternity of waiting. She responded in less than a heartbeat, standing on her toes so she could put her arms around his neck.

Suddenly, there was a loud cough and quickly they broke apart. Sirius and Isabella stood at the back of the classroom; Isabella looked at the ground awkwardly, but Sirius looked straight at Amaryllis and shook his head. He then stormed out of the classroom.

Amaryllis looked at Severus apologetically, before running out behind Sirius.

"Sirius!" she called, but he kept walking. "Can you just listen!" A group of students nearby watched the exchange, and he stopped. She caught up to him and led him to an empty classroom nearby.

"I don't understand you, Amaryllis" Sirius rounded on her, once the door was closed. "First you cry and then you go back to him, then you cry again and then you go back to him again. It's an endless cycle!"

"I know how it looks" she explained. "But I'm sure now, I promise."

"That's what you said last time."

"Sirius –"

"I don't care!" he snapped. She flinched at his tone. "Not anymore – you do what you want to do, Amaryllis. I'm not going to stop you. I'm not even going to say anything to you – just don't come crying to me when it all goes to shit."

Amaryllis felt her eyes sting. Sirius had never spoken so coldly to her before. He opened his mouth to speak again but upon seeing her face, he stopped dead in his tracks. He put his arm around her instead.

"I'm sorry, Milly. I overreacted" he said softly. He let go of Amaryllis and looked at her properly. "But I still don't like this".

"I know."


	27. Chapter 27

**CONTENT WARNING: DEATH AND SUICIDE**

Isabella 

Isabella was excited for class. She and Severus were going to teach their third-year Hufflepuff and Slytherin students about Boggarts and the_ Riddikulus_ charm. The students seemed excited also. They quickly lined up in front of an old wardrobe in which the Boggart was hiding.

Alia Yemen, a Slytherin student, was first in line. When the Boggart was released, it quickly transformed in to an extremely large cockroach, that made even Isabella's skin crawl. "_Riddikulus!_" yelled Alia. The cockroach transformed in to a beautiful butterfly.

Thrilled chatter broke out amongst the students and Severus had to glare at them to quieten them down again.

Next, Kate Friend, Hufflepuff, came forward and the Boggart transformed from the butterfly in to a frighteningly huge python. "_Riddikulus!_" The Boggart changed in to a large balloon dog.

Graham Sylvester's turn came next. He was a Slytherin student who Isabella noticed was very quiet in class. The balloon dog transformed, and she watched in horror as Bellatrix Lestrange stood before him. Instinctively, she quickly ran in front of him.

There was a high-pitched scream, from which student she would never know. They stared at something behind her with equal expressions of terror; she turned around.

The last thing Isabella saw was a pair of little, bare feet, before her knees buckled, and darkness consumed her vision.

….

_"Sammy, put some shoes on, or your feet are going to get cold" she scolded. She put her hands on her hips in a matronly way. _

_"No" said Sam stubbornly. "I hate shoes, Bellie. You know that…Can I have a piggy back?"_

_Isabella sighed. "Fine." He ran as fast as he could and jumped on her back._

_"Bloody Hell Sam, you're getting heavier by the day." She began walking towards the pond near their house._

_"Will I be going school soon like you, Bellie?" asked Sam. There was hopefulness in his voice._

_"Mmhmm" she said. "But you'll be going to a different school. It'll be better than mine. Better people. You'll make loads of friends."_

_"Really?"_

_"I promise."_

_"Can I take Murray with me?" asked Sam. She thought of the clingy little Bowtruckle that he loved so much._

_"We'll see."_

_Isabella stopped at the pond and let her little brother off her back. Out of her pocket, she took out two slices of bread wrapped in a napkin, and gave one to him. They watched as a family of ducks swam towards them, keenly awaiting their daily feed._

_Sam loved feeding the ducks._

_"Isabella! Sam!" they heard their mother call. They ran back to the house quickly._

_She noticed that her mother looked particularly white._

_"Isabella, go to your room" she said sternly. "And don't come out until I say so." She then held her hand out so Sam could take it. He went to her eagerly._

_Isabella waited until her mother could not see her again and followed them to the living room, a room that she could not bear to be in thereafter. She hid behind one of the pillars, Sam's pillar, the one he like to hide behind when they played hide and seek._

_ She watched, now understanding what would happen. She was too scared to move, too scared to even close her eyes. The sound of her little brother's body thudded to the hard timber floor, the loudest noise Isabella had ever heard. Her body now limp in shock, her mouth left open. She did not even notice the trickle of drool that fell on the ground beneath her. Her mother was visible, her face as lifeless as her son's._

_Somebody put a sheet over Sam, a rough job; his little, bare feet were not covered. The very last part of him that Isabella ever saw again._

Her eyes opened slowly, and she squinted, trying to adjust to the light. When she could finally see clearly, she realised she was in the hospital wing. Ginny and Sirius were at her bedside, concern etched on their faces.

"What happened?" she croaked.

"You feinted" said Ginny. "After seeing your Boggart, we think..."

Isabella felt her stomach drop. She remembered it now.

"Snape brought you here right away" continued Ginny. "I think he feels really bad."

"He should have known better" said Sirius with contempt. "He's –"

"No" interjected Isabella. "It's not – not his fault,_ I_ should have realised what my Boggart would be. I wasn't thinking."

"It's not your fault either, Bella" Ginny said gently.

Isabella said nothing, not wanting to speak anymore. Thankfully, Madam Pomphrey came and shooed Ginny and Sirius away. As soon as they left, she shut her eyes tightly. The image of Sam was imprinted in her mind, and she dug her long nails in to the palm of her hand intensely, hoping the pain would make the image disappear. But it was in vain. The image was stuck now.

Madam Pomphrey appeared again. "How are you feeling?" she asked.

"Fine" lied Isabella. "Can I leave now?"

"I would rather you stay here for a while longer."

"I'm fine, really" she insisted. "I just need to rest. I can do that in my room."

Madam Pomphrey looked at her sternly. "Very well" she said. "But make sure you actually rest."

Isabella walked slowly to her quarters. Her path was clear, but she could not see; her mind was plagued with one awful thought.

Sam's death was her fault too.

She should have, _could have_, run away with him when she had the chance to. She should have told Sam to ignore their mother, to keep feeding the ducks, to never go back home…

Her breathing became laboured. She wanted to remember no more. Nor did she want to keep going. She had done her part for the war. Her parents and those other awful people who killed Sam were in prison now. She had gotten justice for her little brother.

What more did Isabella have left to do now?

She took a detour to the Dungeons. There, she knew of the potions Severus stocked. She picked her potion of choice and hid it in her sleeve. When she entered her quarters, she went straight into the bathroom. She locked the door.

In the shower now, she sat on the ground. She took out the small vile of potion from her sleeve, and stared it, tears now streaming down her face.

Isabella's final thought was of Murray, who she never saw again after that day. She could not blame it for leaving her too. The small creature could only bear so much heartbreak.

She poured the contents of the vile in to her mouth.

She could not cry anymore. She could barely think.

She was going to Sam.


	28. Chapter 28

Amaryllis 

"It's not your fault, Severus."

He looked away from her. "If I had known…"

"But you didn't."

"_I should have."_

"She's OK now" said Amaryllis. "Madam Pomphrey discharged her. She's probably just resting."

Severus said nothing. She moved from her seat and walked to the side of his office where his chair was, and sat on the ground in front of it so that she could put her head in his lap. "She's going to be Ok."

She felt his hand stroke her hair. She kissed his knee before taking his hand and kissing his knuckles. Severus lifted her chin with his other hand and kissed her lips gingerly. He pulled her up, so she could sit on his lap and they kissed more passionately. Amaryllis heard a knock at the door and started to pull away, but Severus gripped her tighter.

There was a second, louder knock and they both heard the strict voice of Minerva call "Severus" through the door. They broke apart immediately. Amaryllis quickly sat back down on her chair, straightening out her dress and smoothing her hair so it looked neat. She nodded at Severus to indicate she was ready.

He opened the door to Minerva; her expression was full of grief.

"Good that you're both here, saves me the trip" she addressed them both. "Isabella has been transferred to St Mungo's. She attempted to take her own life."

Amaryllis felt her heart drop immediately. "_What?_" she gasped. She looked at Severus, who had turned pale.

"She's stable now."

Shw breathed a sigh of relief. "How though – how did it happen?"

"Horace believes she must have drank a potion, he's unsure of which one though" said Minerva grimly. "Poppy discharged her this afternoon…poor dear, so distraught – as you can imagine."

"It wasn't her fault" said Amaryllis at once. "I'm sure she genuinely thought Isabella was Ok." Minerva nodded in agreement. "Are we allowed to go see her in hospital?"

"Yes, but Albus has suggested to wait until tomorrow. I informed Molly and Arthur Weasley, so they should be there by now, along with Anna Lindsay. Sirius is there as well." She sighed. "I have to inform Ginny Weasley – I should do that now."

When Minerva left them, Amaryllis turned to Severus immediately. "I can't believe this" she whispered.

He said nothing. Carefully, she touched his arm, but he recoiled back in disgust. "Severus don't –"

"You need to leave."

"Don't push me away."

"Go."

"I'm not going anywhere." She put her arms around him and gripped her hands together like a vice so it was harder for him to move her away. He showed little resistance, before submitting and finding solace in her arms.

Isabella 

_Please let me be dead, _thought Isabella. Her eyes were closed but slowly she began to hear noise around her.

_Why am I not dead?_

_I should be dead. _

Voices, then words, and at a distance, sobbing. Anna? No, this person was louder than Anna.

Isabella opened her eyes slowly for the second time that day. Once her eyes adjusted, she looked around the room; this was not the hospital wing. A middle-aged woman walked in to the room then, she did a double-take when she saw Isabella.

"You're up!" she exclaimed happily.

"Where am I?" There was a rasp in her voice and her throat burned.

"St Mungo's" the woman informed her. "I'm Clarice, one of the healers here. I'm going to be looking after you."

"St Mungo's" repeated Isabella. "As in the hospital?"

"Yes. You were transferred here after you drank an extremely potent potion. Thank goodness you came here in time, any longer and you could have died!"

"That was the point" she said, without thinking.

Clarice looked at her empathetically. "You have so much to live for."

"Sure." She turned on the bed so her back was towards the nurse and closed her eyes again, falling asleep almost immediately. When she woke up, Clarice at the foot of her bed; she held in her hand a glass filled with orange liquid.

"Can I leave yet?"

"Unfortunately not. We just want to keep you here for a little while longer until we think you've healed completely."

"But I'm _fine_ now."

"It'll only be a little while longer" said Clarice. She shook the glass in her hand slightly. "Here, I brought you some pumpkin juice."

Isabella scowled. "ai hate pumpkin juice."

"What would you prefer?"

"To leave."

"Aside from that"

She sighed. "Water – please."

Clarice disappeared and quickly returned with a glass of water. Isabella took it and eagerly drank until the last sip. She did not realise how dehydrated she was.

"Now" said Clarice, putting her hands together. "You have _a lot_ of visitors. Would you like to see them? It's alright if not. I'll just tell them you're still resting."

Of course she wanted to see nobody, but there was no point in delaying the inevitable.

"Let's just get it over and done with."

"How many do you can you handle right now? It doesn't have to be everyone."

"Maybe just one – or two?"

Clarice disappeared again and when she returned, Isabella was relieved to see Anna and Ginny. She smiled thankfully at Clarice as she closed the door, leaving the three friends alone. Anna rushed to Isabella's side and flung her arms around her.

"You're gonna suffocate me" laughed Isabella. Ginny sat on her other side and held her hand tightly. Anna finally let go and sat down.

"I'm so sorry we weren't there for you, Bella" whispered Ginny. Isabella looked at her properly and saw that her eyes were red. "If I knew just how bad – "

"Stop" she interrupted. "It's no one's fault. Nott yours, not Snape's…I wasn't in a good place. There was nothing anyone could have done."

"Still...if I had reached out to you more –"

"Then it would have made no difference" said Isabella. "Trust me."

"What happened?" asked Anna quietly.

She wanted to piece words together to form a lie, to save herself from telling her truth, but what was the point anymore. "Sam died because of me."

"_What?_" gasped Ginny. "You know that's not true!"

"_You_ don't know. I could have prevented it…".

"No –" said Anna, but Isabella cut across her.

"I don't want to talk about it anymore."

There was a long stretch of silence.

"Who's out there" she asked, suddenly curious.

"Mum is" said Ginny solemnly. "She's a mess. Dad had to practically wrangle her from barging in before."

She could be glad about that; there was no way she could face Molly Weasley right now. "Who else?"

"Just the usual suspects. Basically everyone in the Order. I'm sure McGonagall, Snape and Amaryllis would be here too, but apparently Dumbledore advised them to come later."

Isabella felt warmth flood her body. There were so many people who cared about her and she had no idea…

"How long are they going to keep me here?" she asked. Anna and Ginny exchanged glances. "What?"

"Well" Anna began nervously. "From what I heard them say to Dumbledore – when he was here, it sounds like they're going to keep you here for a while to observe you…because you attempted suicide. They think it's too dangerous for you to be anywhere on your own."

Isabella dug her nails in to the palm of her hand. Clarice had lied to her. "_What?_" she spat. "So not only am I not dead, but now I have to be _babysat?_"

"Don't say that" Ginny said sharply.

"Who found me?" she demanded.

Ginny hesitated. "Sirius" she said finally. "Well, sort of – You left your wand in the hospital wing and he suspected something was wrong…He got McGonagall to enter your room and she found you in the bathroom passed out…"

So, out of everybody, it was Sirius. Sirius who had stopped her from being with her little brother Sam and leaving this miserable world behind...

"Don't be angry with him" said Ginny, but just as she opened her mouth to say more, Mrs Weasley burst through the door. She made a bee-line towards Isabella and almost knocked her own daughter off the bed. She flung her arms around Isabella in the same fashion Anna had.

"_How could you?_" she wept. "You foolish girl."

When Isabella was finally released, she noticed that Sirius was in the room also.

"_You" _she said shakily. "You were my friend and you _betrayed_ me."

"_Betray you_?" His eyes widened in shock. "I would never -"

"You should have let me die!"

"But Isabella, you have so much to live for!" cried Mrs Weasley.

Isabella froze, remembering that Clarice had said the same thing to her earlier. It was a hollow statement to her ears, and one she did not appreciate. She had tried to refrain from becoming hysterical but now she could not stop herself any longer. "I DON'T CARE!" she screamed at Mrs Weasley. "I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK I HAVE TO LIVE FOR!"

The whole room fell silent, perhaps even the whole hospital. She could only hear herself breathe.

Ginny's eyes jumped between Isabella and Mrs Weasley, stunned, perhaps never having witnessed anybody speak to her mother in such a way before.

Clarice rushed in to the room then. "Everybody out" she ordered, before leaving Isabella alone to rest once again.


	29. Chapter 29

Isabella

It was Isabella's third day in hospital and she was becoming extremely irritable. She hated the psychiatric ward at St Mungo's, it was the most dreadful place she had ever been to.

'When can I go home?" she asked for the tenth time that morning. She shifted uncomfortably on her bed.

Clarice sighed. "I can't give you an exact day, you know that." She drew the curtains so that the morning sun could shine in to the room. Isabella squinted, blinking several times to adjust to the new light. "We just want to make sure it's safe for you to go home."

"Safe how?" she asked. "Voldemort's defeated now, the world _is_ safe."

"I mean, we want to make sure it's safe for you to go home, and not be a danger to _yourself_."

She dug her fingernails in to her palm, insulted by Clarice's choice of words. "No" she said sharply. "_You _just want to punish me."

"I don't want to punish you, Isabella" said Clarice patiently. "I just want to help you."

"By keeping me here against my will?"

"You're still at high risk. If I let you go home now, there's a high chance you'll relapse."

Isabella let out a frustrated cry. "But why do you _care_?" she asked angrily. "Can't you see that there's no point in you trying to help me?"

Clarice smiled sadly at her. "I see a very capable young woman, who has so much potential "

She rolled her eyes at that, and did not bother replying. There was a knock and they both looked at the door. It was Dumbledore.

"How lovely to see you Albus" said Clarice. She smiled brightly at him. "I take it you've come to visit my favourite patient?"

Isabella scowled.

"I have indeed" he said politely.

"Well I'll leave you two to talk." She patted Isabella's hand before leaving the room, closing the door behind her.

"How are you feeling?" asked Dumbledore. He sat down on the chair next to her bed.

She glared at him. "Why are you here, Professor?"

"I was concerned after your incident."

"You mean me trying to _kill myself_?" she spat. "Thanks, but no thanks. I don't need your concern." She turned her head away from him.

"I'm sure you don't" he said, not phased by Isabella's tone. "I understand the pain you must have felt, I myself –"

"_Don't – _try and relate to me" she said menacingly. "You can't console me."

"I'm not here to console you, Isabella."

"Then what?"

"I want to discuss what happened."

"Not interested."

"Why did you try to end your life?"

Isabella turned her head back sharply, ready to shout obscenities at him, but he held her gaze. "I - I can't help but feel that I could have stopped Sam from dying" she said instead.

"How?"

"I could have literally done _anything _– but I did nothing "

"You were quite young."

"No, I wasn't." Her temper flared again. "I was 15. By that age, Harry Potter had saved multiple people's lives."

"Harry is an exception, it was the prophecy –"

"But not everyone has a bloody prophecy!" She kicked the foot of her bed frame. "I never heard of any prophecy about you defeating Grindewald, or any other dark wizards for that matter."

Dumbledore was a quiet then. "Isabella, who killed Sam? Who was the person?"

"You already know."

"Remind me."

She clenched her jaw. "My father" she said vehemently.

"How did he do it?"

"He used the killing curse."

"Did you play a hand in that?"

"No. But I also didn't stop it."

"Did you pass your father the wand, so he could cast the curse?"

"No."

"Did you encourage him to cast the curse?"

"No."

"Did you even _know_ that he was about to cast that curse?"

"No" said Isabella. Her jaw was still clenched.

"Then tell me why you are responsible" asked Dumbledore. "Do you hold yourself responsible because you could not predict the future? Or that you could not read your father's mind?" She remained silent. "Isabella, the only person responsible for your brother's death is your father. The Death Eaters, Voldemort, those who encouraged him - they can also be held responsible, if you like. But not you. You are a victim to that traumatic event."

Isabella considered his words. "But it doesn't change how I feel" she concluded.

"Look at everything you have done. You gave refuge to so many so that they could be safe. You worked with me – you could have died –"

"Professor, my life doesn't mean _anything"_ said Isabella. "It was never a sacrifice."

"But it was!" marveled Dumbledore. "And you have shown how much of a sacrifice you made by being here in this hospital today. You sacrificed your own happiness to keep going. You sacrificed being with Sam in death. You sacrificed submitting to your sadness. All this to make sure his death was not in vain, and to provide safety to those who were in danger. You did all this, even though you wanted nothing more than to leave this world."

Tears threatened to fall, and could not longer deny them in Dumbledore's presence. He politely waited until she found her voice again. "Why then do I feel like I've accomplished nothing?" she asked. "Why do I still feel so empty?"

"Because you are still grieving" he said simply.

"But I was fine before – just the other day" said Isabella. "All these thoughts…why are they crashing down on me suddenly?"

"Well, there is no time limit to how long you can grieve" offered Dumbledore. "But if you would like me to give you a more specific answer, then let me bring your attention to your past – Your first response to Sam's death, was it to end your life?"

She nodded.

"But you didn't, why?"

"I wanted justice."

"So you spent your time attaining that – careful planning, carrying out missions, living in secret as a spy for me, as well as being the Isabella Parish everybody knew you as. You were extremely _busy. _Now, move to yesterday; you saw your Boggart. And that was?"

"Sam's dead body."

"And what did you have left to attain at that point?"

"Nothing."

"So you did the exact opposite of what you had done when you saw Sam's body for the first time – You spent_ all_ your time thinking about his death, how you felt about it, what your response could be now it's all over – which was to do the very thing you wanted to do all those years ago, to end your life. The wound is fresh again because you relived his death for the second time, but this time you have to confront it."

She wiped her tears with her sleeve. "I can't spend my days thinking about it" she whispered. "My mind…it feels like it's on _fire_ – I can't handle it anymore."

"Yes you can, Isabella" said Dumbledore. "You can handle grief and loss, and you _have._ You have done it for years."

"It's not the same."

"Of course it isn't, but you now have people to love and people who love you, to keep you going. They will be the ones that help you move on."

"_Don't you understand?_" she said, suddenly furious with him. "I can't move on from Sam. I don't _want_ to!"

"Moving on does not mean forgetting your brother, or not loving him. Allow yourself to grieve, to revisit old memories. Do it all, but ultimately you must go on."

"I don't want to."

Dumbledore considered her for a moment before he spoke again. "Do you think Sam would be happy to see you in this state?"

"He might be happier with me."

"At the cost of your life?" he asked. "Forgive me, but I do not think he would be that selfish."

She closed her eyes, and leaned her head back in to her pillow. "No, he wouldn't."

"You see, it is possible. You can live with Sam's love, you can honour his memory. You are far stronger than you give yourself credit for."

"You think too highly of me, Professor."

"What can I say?" said Dumbledore. He had on his face a growing smile. "I have intense admiration for anybody who has yelled at Molly Weasley and lived to tell the tale."


	30. Chapter 30

Severus

"Thanks for bringing me my stuff" said Isabella. She rummaged through the bag of clothing and picked up a navy coloured sweater. "I hate these bloody hospital gowns."

"It's nothing" said Amaryllis. "We were coming to see you anyway." She sat on the bed, while Severus sat on the chair next to the bed.

He looked at Isabella properly then and instantly noticed that she looked weaker, paler, and perhaps even smaller than he remembered her. Her voice was hoarse, which he suspected was the result of drinking the potent potion that brought her to the hospital.

"Just to let you know, I'm doing well - before you awkwardly ask me how I am."

"That's good" commented Amaryllis. "Though to be completely honest, the first thing I was going to ask you was whether I could borrow your blue dress, I have a party to go to in a couple of days and I think that's a little more important right now."

Isabella burst out laughing. "Oh, well in that case, who cares how I'm feeling." Severus rolled his eyes at them; he would never understand women.

"But seriously" said Amaryllis. "That's good to hear. We were really worried about you."

He locked eyes with Isabella; he opened his mouth to speak, but she beat him to it.

"I am so sorry about what happened in class. I should have known better than to put myself in front of the students like that."

Severus shook his head. "I should have been more attentive to the class, I felt – _feel_ extremely remorseful…"

"It's Ok Severus, really" she said. "Were the students Ok?"

"Some were a little shaken, but on the whole, they were fine."

"That's good…though I think you should check on Graham Sylvester, after seeing what his Boggart was, the poor kid's probably really messed up."

Severus made a mental note of it.

There was a knock on the door, and a woman, a healer Severus assumed, popped her head in to the room, before closing the door again.

"That's Clarice" grumbled Isabella. "She has to do these checks every twenty minutes – you know, to make sure I'm not trying to _kill myself."_

Severus grimaced, not knowing how else to respond.

"So, I guess it's safe to assume that you hate it here?" said Amaryllis.

"It's _terrible._ This place is like a combination of Azkaban and being babysat – in that I can't leave _and _they treat me like a toddler. My wand got confiscated too."

"What do you do to kill the time?"

"Mainly visitors, Anna dropped off some books – not that I've been bothered to read them" said Isabella. "What about school? Any hot gossip?"

"Not really" replied Amaryllis. "I think the students have caught on that Severus and I are –" She stopped, and Severus saw her eyes become wide, as if she had just told revealed a large secret.

Isabella rolled her eyes at that. "I already know you two are together" she informed them. "Sirius and I walked in on you two snogging, remember?"

He shifted in his seat uncomfortably; he was a private man after all, and while he did like Isabella, he did not like his affairs being spoken about so openly.

"Speaking of Sirius" said Amaryllis in an obvious attempt to change the subject. "Are you speaking to him again? I heard you had some choice words for him and Molly."

Isabella's face fell. "I didn't mean to say what I did to them, it was just the moment…"

"I'm sure they know that too."

She sighed. "Well Sirius - he's been here basically every day" she answered. "Though I haven't spoken to him yet. I'm not upset with him anymore. It's just that if I start talking to him – everyone really – then I'll have to _keep _talking, which I don't really feel like doing everyday."

"I understand" said Severus quietly. Isabella gave him a small smile, but then her face fell again.

"Don't think Dumbledore is going to let me come back to school" she said grimly. "And just when we were becoming comfortable with one another."

"Well" began Severus. He paused awkwardly, struggling to find words now. "You are always welcome to speak to me, if you wish."

She laughed. "Thanks Severus. That means a lot coming from you."

Anna 

Anna was fast becoming good friends with Fred Weasley. They had absolutely nothing in common, and yet, somehow, they could spend hours together.

"Fred, you and George really need to clean your place." She wrinkled her nose as she looked around the living room of the twin's apartment; there were half empty containers of takeaway food piled on the coffee table and clothes thrown all over the sofa.

"We thought about getting a house elf, but Hermione'd probably be on our tail about it."

"Or you can just learn how to clean" suggested Anna. "You two have such imaginative brains and can do so much with your magic, yet you can't even use a feather duster."

"OK _Mum_" said Fred sarcastically. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"What does Angelina think when she comes over?"

He shrugged. "Don't know, probably that we're slobs. She's always been a bit of a nag though, even when we used to date."

Anna's jaw dropped. "You two used to _date_?"

"Yep."

"And now she's dating your twin brother."

"Yep."

"Isn't that weird?" she asked curiously.

"Not really" replied Fred. "Angelina and I started dating after I asked her to the Ball in sixth year, it was kind of a carry-on thing, really. She and George are a far better fit."

Anna nodded slowly, trying to comprehend this new information. "I guess if it works…"

He shrugged again. "Oh! That reminds me." He disappeared quickly then returned with a thin package. "For you" he said, grinning.

"Fred! You shouldn't be spending your money on me!"

He rolled his eyes. "Just open it." She delicately tore the wrapping paper and gasped when she saw the contents: her favourite brand of writing parchment. "I remember you saying you needed more a little while back" he said, chuckling at her reaction.

Anna thought back to when she spoke to Fred about it; it was an offhand comment, and she felt touched that he remembered it. "Thank you" she said sincerely.

"You're welcome, Annie."

She looked at him with a surprised expression.

"What?" he asked.

"Thomas is the only person who's ever called me 'Annie'."

Fred scoffed. "Well, _so-rry."_

"No, I didn't mean it like that" said Anna quickly. "It's just that no one else have ever called me that. I like 'Annie'."

"Well I don't want to call you 'Annie' if _Thomas_ already does."

"It's really not a big deal. It's not like Thomas owns that word." Fred grunted in response. "Do you have a problem with him?"

"Nope."

"Yeah sure" said Anna. "That sounded _believable_…"

"I just think he's a pretty boy."

She frowned. "What does that mean?"

"All he cares about is how he looks and trying to get with girls."

"You don't even know him!" she exclaimed, immediately defensive now.

Fred look at her, surprised. "That's the loudest I've ever heard your voice go."

She blushed momentarily before regaining her composure. "Well, you're talking about my best friend. I'll have you know that Thomas is _much _more than what you think."

"If you say so…"

"I do" she said stubbornly.

He grinned at her then. "You know, you look like a little piglet when you get mad."

She glared at him. "That's not very nice."

"I meant it as a compliment!" laughed Fred, putting his hands up in surrender. She turned around in mock anger. "OK OK, Miss Dramatic." He had a mischievous look on his face when she faced him again.

"Well, I don't like the look of that."

"I've actually been meaning to talk to you about something" he said and gestured for her to take a seat on the sofa. She tentatively sat on an empty spot that wasn't covered by the twin's dirty clothes. "So, I was reading the Quibbler and I noticed that they publish short stories by people who write in. I reckon you should definitely give it a go. You can have a pen name if you don't want your real name mentioned."

Anna frowned. "No way" she said at once.

"Why not?"

"Because I'm not that good, Fred."

"I bet you are."

"You haven't even read my writing" she countered.

"Well not for a lack of trying! It's not my fault you're so secretive."

"No."

"Just give it once chance, and you don't have to tell me which story yours is. They publish plenty, so I wouldn't even know."

"No."

"It can be for my birthday!"

"Your birthday's already passed."

"What about –"

Anna sighed frustratingly then. "Fine! If it'll get you to shut up."

"Yes!" He smirked at her. "See I can annoy you in to doing _anything."_

"But only if you clean up the living room."

His smirk slid of his face instantly. "That wasn't part of the deal."

She grinned at the small victory. "Clean or no story."

"Fine" he huffed.


	31. Chapter 31

Isabella 

Isabella awoke to her stomach growling. She tried to sit up so she could call Clarice, but she could not move her feet; there was something heavy on top of them. She gripped the side of the bed and hoisted herself up. There was large, black dog sleeping at the foot of the bed.

"Sirius, I know it's you."

The dog woke instantly and she watched it jump off the bed and transform into its human counterpart. He smiled sheepishly at her.

"Can't blame a man for trying."

"How did you get past Clarice?" Isabella asked curiously.

"I'm very charming, you know" Sirius replied, puffing his chest. "That, and I snuck in while she went on her break."

A beat of silence, and suddenly his face changed. Instinctively, she turned her head so she would not have to speak, but he grabbed her hand. "Isabella, I am so sorry about what you had to go through" he said sincerely. "I'm sorry you lost your brother, and then your parents…I can understand why you would have thought about ending your life, but Bella, I am _so_ happy that you're still here."

Her body was instantly flooded with warmth. "Thank you, Sirius." She smiled sadly at him. "I'm sorry for how I behaved the last time we saw each other."

"I know you didn't mean it."

Her stomach growled. She thought about calling out for Clarice again, but she remembered that Amaryllis had brought her a canister of brownies that had made herself. It was a sweet gesture.

She offered one to Sirius first.

He picked his brownie and took a bite, but within seconds he spat it out. "_What is this?_" he cried, and he held the brownie away from his body as if it were a bomb.

"Brownies" answered Isabella. "Amaryllis made them for me."

He paled. "You know her cooking is poisonous, right?"

"It is not" she said, rolling her eyes. She then took a bite of her own brownie to demonstrate her point but she immediately gagged when the flavour hit her tongue.

"_What the hell?_"

"Told you" sang Sirius. He laughed when she threw her brownie at his head and missed.

Amaryllis 

Amaryllis opened the door to her quarters and was startled when she saw Severus standing outside. His fist was balled, as if he was about to knock on the door.

"Oh God, you scared me" she said breathlessly.

He looked at her purse. "You're going somewhere?"

"Yeah, I was actually just about to look for you. I need to go to Diagon Alley to get some things, so I won't be at dinner."

He looked as if he was in deep thought. "I have to get some supplies as well" he said finally. "We can go together, if you like?" Amaryllis noted that he looked particularly awkward.

"Like a date?" she teased. He glared at her. "Sure."

As she walked through the corridor with Severus, they both heard a loud wolf whistle. Out of the corner of her eye she saw a group of boys, most likely in their fifth or sixth year, sniggering. Severus's head snapped in their direction and the group quickly dispersed. She rolled her eyes at their immaturity.

When they arrived at Diagon Alley, Amaryllis and Severus decided to split up as they needed to go to different stores. They would then meet up again at Flourish and Blotts.

Amaryllis's first stop was Madam Malkin's; she needed a new pair of work robes. An assistant tended to her straight away and she was thankful to leave the store within ten minutes.

She looked at her list as she walked on to the street again and within a matter of seconds, she crashed in to another person. Her list and shopping bag fell out of her hands.

"Sorry!" cried Amaryllis apologetically. She quickly crouched to the ground to recover her belongings.

"_Watch it, girl_" the person growled above her.

Surprised at their rudeness, she stood up and looked at the person before her; he had long, white-blonde hair and a scowl that looked like it was a permanent fixture on his face. He looked familiar, though she could not recall from where. Behind him was a younger man with similar features who she presumed was his son.

The man looked as if he were about to say more but something over Amaryllis's shoulder seemed to pique his interest instead. His scowl turned in to a sneer.

"Severus" he said coldly.

"Lucius."

She remembered where she has seen him now; the Daily Prophet. Lucius Malfoy and his son, Draco.

"So I see the rumours are true" he said coldly. "You've found yourself another_ Mudblood_."

"Severus, we should get moving" Amaryllis said at once. She locked eyes with Draco momentarily before he quickly looked away.

"Yes, you should keep moving, _Severus_" taunted Lucius. "Your _master_ Dumbledore must be waiting for you at school." He turned around, appearing to leave them, but then he stopped. "A word of advice?" he said over his shoulder. "Keep an eye on your _little_ _bird_." He eyed Amaryllis disdainfully before turning back around, and he disappeared with his son into the street.

The rest of the shopping trip was cancelled, and Amaryllis and Severus apparated back to Hogwarts immediately. He walked to his quarters in long strides, making it difficult for her to keep up with him. When they entered his quarters, he paced back and forth in the living room.

"Are you Ok" Amaryllis asked tentatively.

He looked at her in disbelief. "They know who you are."

"And?"

"There is a target on your back now."

She sighed. "I doubt it. Isabella said there was a target on my back when they thought I was seeing Sirius, remember?"

"This is completely different" he snapped. "They hate me more than Black – I betrayed them. I played a hand in their Master's demise."

"I don't think –"

"This can't work."

She froze. "_What?_"

"For your safety."

"Severus, no…" She shook her head furiously. "Please don't. You can't keep doing this to me."

"You would be safe" he repeated.

"Please –"

"I'm a poison to everybody around me" he said bitterly.

"No, you're not" said Amaryllis. She tried to hold his hand, but he clenched it into a fist.

"I'm not good for you." He turned away from her.

Amaryllis hung her head in despair, uttering only the words of her own conclusion: "I'm not good _enough_ for you" she whispered.

Severus spun around. "_No_ –"

"Yes." Her voice broke. "What other reason can there be? It's _me_. You don't want me."

"Amaryllis –"

She forced her legs to move towards the door but he grabbed her arm as she passed him; he pulled her body to his.

"I_ do_ want you" he growled. His lips were so close to her ear, sending shivers down her spine. She raised her eyes to meet his, seeing only truth behind his dark irises.

The next few movements felt like a blissful blur, and then her back was pressed against a hard surface. She blushed when she realised; a door. _The_ door to Severus's bedroom.

He looked down at her with his eyebrows tightly knit together, wordlessly asking if she was sure.

She nodded.


	32. Chapter 32

**TRIGGER WARNING: MENTION OF SUICIDE**

Severus 

Severus woke up every day miserable. It was a cycle that he had been stuck in for almost all his life and one that he thought could never break. But this morning, something _did_ break the cycle, and it could be attributed to the beautiful woman sleeping peacefully beside him.

Her chest rose and fell, rhythmic in timing, like a gentle tune. He was mesmerized watching it. But then she stirred, and she unconsciously turned in her sleep to face him, thus breaking the cycle.

Amaryllis Swan seemed to be quite good at that.

The gentle tune began again. This time Severus studied her face.

He had never looked at her this closely before, and perhaps, he thought, it was only in intimate moments like this he would be able to.

She had a small, feint scar underneath her left eye shaped like the letter 'T'. Her hair was knotted and it gave her a frazzled look that he found extremely endearing. She wore a hint of a smile even when she slept…

Had Severus been told on their first meeting that one day he and Amaryllis would end up here, he would never have believed it. Life certainly was unpredictable.

Amaryllis stirred again and her eyes fluttered wide open. She smiled serenely at him once she gathered her surroundings.

"Don't tell me you've been up thinking of how to break up with me, Severus." Her voice was hoarse. "Because I will actually hex you if you do."

"I'd like to see you try" he replied, impressed with her nerve.

She smiled at him them, dazed, as if she was in a dreamland, and her hand caressed his face. "You are _so_ beautiful."

That was a lie, he thought bitterly. He knew that. Everybody knew that.

"I'm not."

"You _are._"

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I suppose."

"Good" said Amaryllis. "I don't want anyone else looking at you."

Warmth flood through his body. It was certainly an odd sensation, knowing somebody desired him so.

"Severus" she said apprehensively. "Be truthful with me. Was last night…alright? I feel like maybe I wasn't that good – it's Ok to tell me if I wasn't."

He knew the answer 'yes' would not suffice for her. "If I didn't think you were good, then it wouldn't have happened so many _times_."

Her cheeks flushed bright pink and she looked away. "Oh." Severus could see a small smile form on her face.

Amaryllis nestled closer to him and laid her head on his chest. He closed his eyes in pure contentment. Everything felt right about this. He did not even notice that she had taken his arm, because when he opened his eyes again, the faded Dark Mark on his wrist was in his line of vision.

Repulsed at himself, he sat up.

"Severus – ?"

"I don't deserve this."

"What don't you deserve?" asked Amaryllis. "Talk to me."

"This – _you_. Everything I have done. I can't do it to you."

"You're not making any sense."

"Of course I'm not" said Severus lowly. "I'm not – you are – so..."

"I'm what?"

"_Fragile_."

"_What?_" she said incredulously. "I'm not fragile!"

"It was not an insult."

"How else am I supposed to take it? _Pillow talk_?"

Severus struggled to find the right words. "You're too _good_."

Unchanged in her expression, Amaryllis took his hand and nestled her face into his open palm. "We're good for each other" she murmured. He could feel her lips move against his hand.

"Amaryllis, _please_." He berated himself for the effect her sweet gesture had on him; how the hell could he deny her _now_?

She sighed and moved her face away from his hand. "Would it help you to know I also struggle with feeling like I deserve this?"

He frowned. "Why wouldn't you deserve it?"

"Severus, my mother cheated on my father and on the day she died, she was with another man. My father only found out about her when the floodgates opened after her death. it destroyed him, and he…he committed suicide.

I was very young when it happened, so their actual deaths didn't really affect me, but their reputation has haunted me for almost all my life.

Growing up, everybody compared me to my mother. And don't get me wrong, I loved – _love_ her. But because of all the comparisons, I didn't get the chance to form my own identity. To them, I was just my mother reborn, destined to do to men what she had done to my father. And when so many people say the same thing about you over and over and for so long, you can't help but wonder if there's any truth to it. And so I did, and I promised myself that I would never, ever even_ try_ to feel for anyone else.

And then you came into my life. And it was _so_ confusing, because on one hand, I had all those bad things in my head, but on the other hand, I wanted you _so_ much. The feeling of being with you – being even just _near_ you…it was just…right. Just right.

So Severus, I need you to know; I'm not this perfect flower that you think I am. I have dark places and fears just like you do, but I choose to let my feelings for you overpower them because they're _real_. Our fears are an extension of the worst things we _imagine._

I gave up my fears to be with you. Please don't give me up to be with your fears."

Severus was speechless. If he thought he understood everything there was to know about Amaryllis Swan then he was _dead _wrong. She was all the good things he had seen in her before, and now he knew just how strong she was.

She did not need Severus to protect her from himself.

And that was what he needed.

"Live in the present with me, Severus."

"I will."


	33. Chapter 33

Isabella 

Isabella was happy to be getting weekend leave from the hospital. She decided to stretch her legs before Sirius arrived and took a stroll around the general hospital; it was so much livelier than the psychiatric ward. As she turned a corner, she saw the familiar face of Lavender Brown.

"Lavender, hi!"

"Oh – hi" said Lavender awkwardly. She wore a mixture of alarm and fatigue, and upon closer inspection there were a number of small faded scars on her face.

"What are you doing here?"

"I just..um..came to get some…"

"Potion?" offered Isabella. She jerked her head at the small vile in Lavender's hand.

"Oh! Yes" said Lavender. She lifted her arm but still had the vile concealed underneath her pale knuckles. "For my Mum – you know, she's been sick."

Isabella looked closely at the vile. She could see maybe just half an inch of the liquid, but excellent in Potions as she was, she instantly recognised it.

"_Wolfsbane_."

Lavender blanched.

"I'm not going to tell anyone, I promise" Isabella said quickly.

"Yeah, _sure_" said Lavender sceptically. She turned around.

"I've actually been in the psychiatric ward for the past week, I tried to commit suicide" disclosed Isabella. She hoped sharing this information about herself would make Lavender feel less vulnerable.

Lavender spun back around quickly. "_Oh, _Isabella, I'm – I'm so sorry. Are you Ok now?_ Sorry_, that's a stupid question."

"Not at all" said Isabella reassuringly. "And yeah, I'm fine now. Haven't been properly discharged yet though, but I do get to have leave for the weekend. It's small steps."

"Cool…I'm guessing you're going to spend it with Anna and Harry and his lot?"

"Yeah, you should totally swing by."

Lavender laughed hollowly. "Yeah…I don't think so. Ron and I used to date…so probably not the best idea now he's with Hermione."

Isabella smacked her forehead. "Oh yeah – sorry. Forgot about that" she said. "Doesn't matter. It could just be the two of us. Maybe even if you had time, you could come visit me here."

"I'd like that" said Lavender. She sighed. "I should probably get going – I'm not feeling too good, _you know?_"

"Of course" said Isabella. She smiled. "It was nice to see you again, Lavender."

"Likewise".

….

"You got all your things?" asked Sirius. He took Isabella's clothing bag from her.

"You know it" she said happily. "Now let's get the Hell out of here." She started for the door but was immediately faced with Clarice.

"Not so fast, missy" she said. "Remember the plan. You come back on Monday safe and sound and the likelihood of you getting discharged for good will look a lot sweeter. And you" she added, turning to Sirius. "Keep an eye on her, we're allowing her to leave for the weekend under _your_ assurance."

"Yes yes, we know" said Isabella impatiently. "Can we go now?"

"Yes Isabella. See you on Monday."

Isabella and Sirius apparated to Grimmauld Place quickly and Isabella could not remember a time when she felt more relieved to be in a house. She followed him into the dining room; seated already were Remus, Tonks, James and Lily on one end. She did a doubletake when she saw who was sitting on the other end.

It was Harry, Ron and Hermione.

"_What the Hell!_" she shrieked. "When did you guys get back?"

"Nice to see you too, Bells" laughed Harry. He stood up and walked around the dining table to hug her. Ron and Hermione followed suit eagerly.

"We got back yesterday" said Hermione, as they all sat down. "We wanted to come see you in hospital straightaway, but Sirius said you'd be coming back for the weekend. We thought it would be a nice surprise if you found out once you got here."

"Probably for the best, I was a nightmare in there" confessed Isabella sheepishly.

"I wish we were there for you, Bella" said Harry solemnly.

"It's fine, really" said Isabella. "You know, I didn't realise just how many people cared about me…" She cleared her throat quickly, not wanting to speak about herself any longer. "So, how was travelling? How come you guys are back so soon?"

"It was great!" exclaimed Hermione. "We went to lots of places."

"Favourite place had to be America" said Ron enthusiastically. "We checked out Ilvermorny, the school over there. It was really cool. Did you know they call Muggles '_No-Majs_'? Don't think they're much of a creative bunch –"

"Ronald!" exclaimed Hermione. "They were _very_ hospitable" she said pointedly.

"I'll say" he continued chipperly, as if he had not just been scolded. "I didn't even think they knew who we were, but I swear we must have been asked for an autograph _at least_ fifty times a day."

"Yes, and you absolutely _hated_ the attention, right?"

"Umm – what about you, Harry?" asked Isabella quickly, before Ron could respond.

"It was alright" he said. "Glad to get home to Mum and Dad to be completely honest."

"I can imagine." Her mind went to Sam for the first time in two days, how she wished he would be brought back too…

"Are you alright, Bella?"

She cleared her throat, "Yeah, of course – why wouldn't I be?"

Harry opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted when Mrs Weasley's voice was heard outside of the dining room. Isabella jumped out of her seat and ran quickly in the direction the voice came from. She entered the kitchen.

"Mrs Weasley" she said breathlessly.

"Nice to see you, dear" said Mrs Weasley; no hostility could be detected in her tone.

Isabella stood awkwardly at the door.

"I'm really sorry for how I spoke to you at the hospital –" she began to say, but Mrs Weasley had already thrown her arms around her.

"You silly girl"

Isabella did not respond, she clung on to Mrs Weasley as tightly as she was being held.

….

"You can stay in this room if you like" offered Sirius.

Isabella entered the room and immediately she saw Gryffindor banners. "This is your old bedroom?"

"It is indeed" he replied fondly.

She put her bag down and neared the closest wall to the bed, it was covered with photographs. There were so many different things to look at in each photo, but her eyes sought out the only thing she wanted to see: Sirius and Regulus. There was only one photo of the two of them; Sirius looked no older than eight or nine, he had his little arm around a giggling Regulus. The photo must have been taken before he was sorted into Gryffindor.

She continued scanning the wall until her eyes fell upon a number of bikini-clad Muggle girls. "Your Mother must have _loved _these."

Sirius laughed heartily. "I thought she was going to blast my head off the day she discovered them. It was only a matter of time after that I got chucked on the street."

She grinned at him. "Well you certainly paved the way for me, that's for sure". She sat on the bed and put her hands in her lap. "This room…it makes so much sense to me…so different to anything else that exists in this house."

"I thought you'd appreciate it."

"I wish you and I grew up together." Isabella felt childish as she said it. "I know I would have felt a lot less lonely with you around. I bet we would have been really good friends."

"I think so too" said Sirius.


	34. Chapter 34

Sirius

"Oh grow up, Sirius" sighed Amaryllis. She held a purple dress against her frame and frowned at her reflection in the mirror before tossing it on to the bed next to where Sirius lay.

"So, what time did Snape leave this morning?" he asked as he picked up the dress with his wand and examined it.

She turned around and furrowed her brow. "About five-ish? It has to be early so none of the students could see him."

Sirius pretended to gag.

She looked back into the mirror and sighed; then with a wave of her hand, she shut the doors of her wardrobe and climbed on to the bed next to Sirius and lay facing him.

"How's Isabella?"

"She's alright" he sighed. "She's getting through it. I thought maybe I was hovering around her too much at home, so I left this morning to give her some alone time – under Kreacher's supervision of course. Not that she knows that."

"And here I was thinking you missed our girl time" teased Amaryllis, though he wore a sad smile. "Sirius, I hope you don't feel like I've abandoned you since getting involved with Severus."

"Not at all" he lied. Truthfully, he had noticed the growing distance between them, but he did not want her to feel bad.

"Liar" Amaryllis said softly.

"It's fine, really" he insisted. "We've both got things going on at the moment. And I get it, being with Snape now – it's new. James was the same when he first started seeing Lily."

"Still…"

"Milly, we're good. I have no doubts our friendship will withstand Snape" Sirius joked. He gave her a reassuring grin but she did not look convinced.

There was a loud knock. Sirius sat up and looked at the door and when he turned back to Amaryllis, she looked at him wide-eyed. "Oh shoot! I totally forgot about - I need to get changed. Can you open the door, please?" Without waiting for an answer, she quickly jumped out of bed and ran into the bathroom.

"Yeah yeah" Sirius murmured. He slowly got off the bed and walked to the entrance of the quarters. When he opened the door, he groaned when he saw Snape. "Hello Snape" he greeted dryly. "If you're looking for Amaryllis, she's left the school because she never wants to see your dirty underpants again –"

Amaryllis suddenly appeared next to Sirius and pushed him out of the doorway.

"Hey" she said breathlessly to Snape. "Sorry about that." She narrowed her eyes at Sirius before turning back to Snape. "Would you mind if we rescheduled today? I was hoping to spend some time with Sirius."

Snape gave her a curt nod. When he turned to leave, Sirius exhaled loudly.

"Don't worry about it" he said, waving his hand in dismissal. "I should get going anyway."

"But Sirius –"

"_Seriously_" he said. "I need to be getting back to Isabella." And it was the truth, he could not help his growing protectiveness over her, especially while she was at Grimmauld Place all alone.

"If you're sure" said Amaryllis.

"I am" promised Sirius. "See you later, Mills."

….

"Can't we at least go to the Three Broomsticks?" whined Isabella. "I'd _kill_ for some Butterbeer."

"I can ask Kreacher to get some" suggested Sirius.

"OK, let me rephrase that" she said sweetly. "I'd kill for some Butterbeer, _outside_ of this house."

He sighed. "I know you would, but I think it would be best if you stayed in for now."

"_But why?"_

"You know why" he replied. "For your safety." He leaned back on his chair and grinned at her from across the dining table, knowing his answer would not be received well.

"Well, then keep me away from potions!" cried Isabella, she threw her hands up dramatically. "That's my poison, isn't it? What am I being couped up in here for? If I had known that you weren't going to let me leave this house then I wouldn't have bothered leaving the ward!"

"Look Bella, I know what it feels like to be stuck in this house –" began Sirius, but she cut across him.

"Is that right?" she said. "Because to me, if you _did_ understand, you wouldn't make me go through it too."

"It's for your safety."

"Uh-huh, because that's exactly what you loved hearing, right?"

She looked at Sirius evenly.

He closed his eyes and breathed out of his nostrils. He remembered the long, isolated days in Grimmauld Place. It was hypocritical for him to be lecturing Isabella about it.

"You're right" he said quietly, and he leaned forward so he could prop his elbows on the dining table. "My days here, they were Hell. I felt useless and worthless…I guess I just got too caught up with trying to keep you safe, I didn't think once about your feelings about it." He paused. "The connection I have with you, I don't have with anyone else…you're my kindred spirit or something. Seeing you that day…it killed me, Bella. I thought I had lost you. Maybe it was selfish of me to keep you going, I just didn't want to lose you."

Isabella stayed silent for a long moment, too long that Sirius wondered if he had said too much. But then – "Sirius, you are the biggest reason why I've _wanted_ to keep going. Whatever you feel about me, know that I feel that but ten thousand times more for you." She reached across the table and placed her hand upon his. "And I appreciate everything you have done for me, I do. But you know that eventually I'm going to have to leave your safe bubble."

"I know."

She smiled at him and sat back in her chair. "Being here…I honestly didn't think I'd make it this far."

"You mean after Snape's class?"

Isabella shrugged. "In life, in general. I always expected to die during the war."

"Bella –"

"No – don't worry, I'm not going down a hole. I'm just…speaking out loud. You're the only person I want to talk to about this."

"OK."

"It's hard to even remember life before Sam's death. I didn't grow up liking things or having fun. I hated school and I hated home. The only thing I liked was my little brother. After…it was like I had zoned out of life. Living but not living.

Some of the kids I went to school with…they had their whole lives planned out: what they would achieve, when they would achieve it. But that was never me. Sam was my future; he was the paradise I was fighting for and where I would go when my life ended. There were no long-term goals, there were barely any short-term goals. I only fought to get through each day.

Things are better now, I know they are. But I'm just a little confused…I don't know where I am with life right now. The things I assumed I would get to achieve over the span of my life, I've done in just a few short years…I don't even know if I've recovered."

"I think that what you're doing here right now, it's the beginning the process" said Sirius thoughtfully.

"I think so too..._oh wise one_" she added humourously.

He barked laughter. "Moony would be proud."

Isabella smiled mischievously. "Does this mean we can go out?" she asked hopefully.

"Fine, but you better be on your best behaviour."

"Always."


	35. Chapter 35

Anna

"_Annie Annie Annie Annieeeeeee._"

"Fred, stop goofing around over there and come help me fold these socks" huffed Anna. "Honestly, it's a miracle I even got you to clean your apartment this morning and you're already messing it up."

"You know _Annie_…for a little piglet, you sure like being clean." A silly grin pulled at his lips.

"Stop calling me that!" She threw a bunched-up pair of socks at Fred's head. He ducked.

"Haha, missed." Anna turned herself around on the sofa. "Oh, alright" he sighed and sat down next to her.

"Isabella might be coming home next week" she said, as she turned herself around again. "I saw her at Sirius's this morning, she looked a lot better."

"Do you think there's something going on with those two?"

"Who?"

"Isabella and Sirius."

Anna frowned. "In what way?"

"You know, like they're together…_romantically_?"

She looked at him incredulously. "He's _way_ too old for her!"

"Hey, it could happen." Fred raised his hands up in defence. "Look at Lupin and Tonks, they've got an age gap and they're married now, same with Snape and his girlfr – _partner_. Also – this is _Isabella _we're talking about here. She could be dating Mad Eye for all we know."

"Who's Mad Eye?" began Anna. "Actually, don't answer that. I'm sure if Isabella was seeing somebody, I would know about it by now."

"Ok, Miss Know-it-all, if you say so." Anna glared at him and the rest of the folding was done in silence.

When they hafinished and Fred had levitated the clothes away to his bedroom (he was too lazy to walk), Anna's left eye suddenly became very irritated. She brushed her top eyelashes with her finger and then prodded the inner corner. Eye rubbing was a habit she had always been reprimanded for by the nuns at the orphanage and she unconsciously clenched her fists in to a ball to discourage herself from doing it.

"You Ok?" asked Fred.

"Yeah – just, something…in my _eye._" As she spoke, she blinked several times, before shutting her eyes completely and submitting to her old habits. She began to madly rubbed her irritated eye with the inside of her palm.

Suddenly, her hands were being pulled away from her face and when her eyes adjusted, albeit through blurred vision, she saw Fred's face only inches away from her own. Perhaps even just one inch. She instinctively tried to move back but he held her hands firmly.

He let go of Anna's left hand and with his free hand, gently pulled down her lower lid. "Don't squirm" he murmured. She could feel his hot breath on her skin.

Sometimes Anna had no control over the thoughts that came in to her mind and in this moment, her lack of control created this blaring thought: _You can kiss him right now, if you really wanted to_.

She blinked in surprise and was met with a sound of frustration from Fred, who seemed to still be determined in taking out whatever was in her eye. Determined herself not to blush, with her free hand, she pinched her other arm – which was still being held by Fred – and tried to focus on that pain.

"There we go" he said finally after some time. He held in the tips of his thumb and forefinger an eyelash that Anna had to suint her eyes to see. Fred still had not moved away from her and for a long moment he and Anna sat on the sofa just looking at each other.

_Is this a moment? Are we about to kiss? Are we? _Anna's mind blared, and her breath was held for some reason. Perhaps in the moment, perhaps in whatever this new feeling was, she did not know. She could only focus on his face still so close to her own.

But then just as suddenly as it began, it was over, and Fred had moved back on the sofa. Anna blinked and tried to adjust to her surroundings. When she looked ahead again, he was looked at her expectantly, perhaps he had said something and she had not registered it.

"Sorry, what?"

"I said, are you going to make a wish?" He impatiently waved his hand in front of her face. She squinted her eyes again and saw he was still holding her eyelash.

"Oh right – um, no. I don't believe in all that."

"Your loss" said Fred, and Anna watched with amusement and something else she could not quite decipher at that moment, as he shut his eyes tightly as a small child would and then blew her eyelash away.

"What did you wish for?" she asked curiously.

"I can't tell you, otherwise it won't come true now, would it."

Anna rolled her eyes. "Oh yeah, sure" she said sarcastically, though to her own ears her tone sounded weaker than normal. "I'm just going to the bathroom." Once she closed the door behind her, she splashed water on her face. She looked closely in the mirror and touched her lower lid, the one that Fred had touched. It had not changed, her face had not changed – so why did it feel different? The skin buzzed and hummed in that very spot, even though the area had been wiped clean with water.

"Hey, do you want to come to a get together with me this afternoon?" asked Fred, when Anna walked back in to the living room. He now lay on the sofa across from the one she had been sitting on. "Oh wait, you said you were going to see _Thomas_ later on" he scoffed.

Thomas? Oh yes, _Thomas_.

"I'm sorry, I already planned to see him" she said apologetically. Fred roll his eyes but she chose to ignore it. "Do you know many of the people who will be there?"

"Oh yeah, George said they'll mostly be old people from school" he replied. "A lot of regular faces. It'll be nice to see Katie though, I haven't seen her in a while."

Her stomach dropped.

_Katie?_ Katie. A girl. A girl named Katie. A girl named Katie who Fred was looking forward to seeing.

_Stop it, Anna!_

"Who's Katie?" she asked nonchalantly.

"She was in the year below us." He stretched his legs out; they were too long, so they dangled over the edge of the sofa. "Gryffindor, of course. She was Chaser on the Quidditch team too."

"Oh."

"I think George invited Fleur's sister as well."

"Fleur…as in your pretty sister-in-law?"

"Yeah, Bill's wife."

"Her sister must be really pretty too." She hoped her voice was even.

Fred shrugged. "I 'spose."

…

"It's good to see you, Annie" said Thomas, as he engulfed her in his usual bear hug. "I feel like I barely get to see you these days."

"I know" she replied apologetically. "Guess we've just been caught up in other things."

He nodded grimly. "I heard about Isabella. How is she going?"

"Better. A lot better actually" said Anna. She recalled Fred's words aboht Isabella and Sirius. "She has a lot of support."

"That's good to hear. Are we allowed to visit her in hospital?"

"Well, she's in a private facility right now, Tommy. But she'll probably be discharged in a couple of days and she'll be back here. You can come see her then."

"Sounds good."

"So, how has university been?" asked Anna. In her heart, she was truly proud of her friend attending university. He had struggled significantly in school; a truth he had confined only in her.

"Good – but different. Well, mostly different" sighed Thomas. She frowned. "Not everyone out there is like you, Annie."

"What do you mean?"

"I've been spoilt when it comes to best friends. You've always been too good to me. You always told me I could achieve anything – but I don't know if I can this time, Annie…This whole degree, I don't know if I'm smart enough to actually go through with it."

"What do you find difficult about it?"

He sighed again; this time with frustration: "Everything. Just everything. I don't understand anything. I feel like an idiot every time I enter class and I just _pray_ that the teacher doesn't call on me to answer."

Anna chose her next few words carefully. "Do you think that maybe a business degree isn't for you, Tommy?"

"Of course I have!" he exclaimed, and roughly pushed his hair away of his face. "It's all Dad, it's what he wants. I tried to tell him I didn't want to study it but he never wants to listen."

"What would you want to do instead?"

"Music. You know that better than anyone. But he doesn't think it'll amount to anything."

"And you still haven't managed to get him to come to any shows?"

"Nope. He just pretends he can't hear me when I ask."

"I'm sorry" Anna said sadly, and she reached over the table and gave Thomas's hand a squeeze. "We can do some study sessions or something, and you can keep going with your music and maybe we can make a balance."

"_We_" he said softly. "You know Annie, you are the _best_ person I know. Kindness is an attribute not many people have. Trust me."

Anna blushed. "Guess I'm not really good for anything else."

"That's a lie and you know it, you're the most interesting person I know." She would have laughed if his tone wasn't so serious. "Anyway, I don't think your boyfriend would be too happy with me whisking you away for study sessions" he added, lightheartedly.

"What boyfriend?"

"That tall bloke you've been spending all your time with" he answered matter-of-factly. "With the red hair? Don't think he likes me much but he seems nice enough. He's definitely into you."

She blushed again. "You mean Fred? We're not together, he's just a good friend."

"Doesn't look like it to me" said Thomas

"Really. It's nothing. And even if I was dating Fr – _had a boyfriend_, I would never let that stop me from being a good friend to you. I think we should really do these study sessions. At least for a little while – please?"

"Ok Annie" said Thomas, and he smiled at her, though not very convincingly.


End file.
